Dragons to bring back WWII-era uniforms in lieu of WWII-era victory
by Peter North
6 November 2017
WOLLONGONG – The St George Illawarra Dragons have announced plans to bring back WWII-era uniforms in lieu of WWII-era victory, Half-Time Oranges can confirm.
The decision would improve morale and save the Dragons money, a spokesperson for the club said. It would also allow the Dragons to potentially recycle old uniforms for decades.
“Nah. Yeah. With this system, we could keep this up for a long time,” co-assistant coach Dean Young said. “Yeah. Nah. Like, players can wear these snazzy things a few years, then bam! We swap em for 1980s-era Steelers scarlet. Saves us, like, two or even three thousand dollars.”
Players were spotted wearing the Dragons 1941 Premiership winning uniform around Wollongong at pre-season training this week, leading Dragons board members and rugby league journalists alike to praise the club for potentially adopting a new playing kit that would not get the Dragons any closer to victory in the 2018 NRL season.
Board members and journalists at the Dragons have praised the idea as an ‘original’ and a ‘completely relevant’ change of pace.
“Um, y’know, um, everything looked better back then,” co-assistant coach Ben Hornby told Half-Time Oranges. “Um, and that’s the heart of the matter. If looks could kill, y’know, the Dragons back then would’ve been unstoppable?!”
Other possible plans include replacing the cotton and polyester jerseys with the older, heavier, 100% cotton jerseys with collars that will help opposition teams tackle the Dragons easier, and at pre-season training swapping the synthetic waterproof Steedens with leather-encased WWII-era rugby balls which are prone to water-logging.
Half-Time Oranges attempted to contact Dragons head coach Paul McGregor for comment on the matter but were informed he was “painting the gym” [sic].