PVP Semi-Finals (2005) Dragons Vs Covells
Dragons Army v Covell Brigade
Please note - This is a game thread only, therefore only game posts can be made here (Teams, Articles).
Any other posts will result in loss of points and is at the discretion of the referee.
Only original essays, not used in previous games, will be marked by referees.
Both teams will be allowed 2 reserves.
Full Time: Wednesday 23rd November at 9pm (Syd time)
Venue: The Front Row Stadium
**Referee Blows Game On!**
Last edited by roosterboy60; 27-11-2005 at 06:06 PM..
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The Dragon Army team for this match will be confirmed within the next 48 hours. We will start writing our essays after this announcement.
Sadly, our squad has been somewhat scrambled with the recent events surrounding the Dragons' former second rower. We can confirm most of the team, however two slots are as yet unfilled.
The Gonz (acting captain)
The Covell Brigade have sprung a selection shock naming untried and untest, ununified member of the covell brigade, but yet massive luke covell fan, Sassquatch for ther eround 2 match. In what prooves to be the game of the round undoubtabely, Horndog_Covell will debut.Covellz Gurl remains on the bench.Here is the full squad:
2) No.5_Luke Covell
Last edited by Big_Bad_Shark_Fan; 23-11-2005 at 07:44 PM..
Sasquatch comes out for his debut to a packed stadium. The crowd roars like how they would for Liam Fulton.
After spending eons on the sidelines, amidst the fans who smell of cabbage and cheese, I – Sasquatch – the man who once violated our coat of arms, has been called up to do battle against fans who have more in common with the demise of a midget version of James “old bean” Collins than the patriarch of our wonderful society, St George himself.
I am now being told that this essay of sorts must be mildly related to the God almighty: Luke Covell.
Oh the stories that I could tell about Luke “Hasselhoff” Covell would, if mounted on a table top, pile highly into the skies where they would wither in the basking of heights that only Luke himself could kick to.
It would be best to begin at the beginning.
It began when I woke up in the garbage pile next to a man with red hair and, as usual, deformed genitals. I amused myself by pelting 50c pieces at his skull.
I had spent the night the St George memorial banquet for the deaf – hosted by none other than Trent “Held” Barrett – where I was most unimpressed. Plentiful booze was appreciated but other parts of the afternoon left me wanting.
And so I erected my down-lofted pants, donned by top hat and admired by bodily physique in the reflection of “Xin Diang Soup Parlour” in what I presumed was Burwood. Induced by my looks, I began rubbing my body over the window in a frisky fashion. It became rather erotic.
I continued on my quest by prancing down Burwood Road to the music of “Living La Vida Loca” towards Concord Oval where I hoped to procure a signature of someone famous in glitter-pen on my left cheek.
Demoralised by lack of players at the ground, I poached a ride with a man named Hershel Kartofsky, a half Ukrainian/ Serbian man, who was dressed in his pink yet tight – oh so tight – formal suit and spontaneously shouted “rectum slurry” whilst liasing with a small pineapple tree that he had found on the side of the road whilst travelling through Lane Cove to our then-present position.
We arrived at Aussie Stadium there after. Disheartened by our lack of tickets to the game, we ventured to the nearest bar that we could find. Sure enough, the nearest bar was the Newtown Hotel where I ordered three Manhattans whilst Hershel made acquittances with his new partner; a bar stool. I honestly don't know what happened to either of them after that. I think he left with the barstool and a group of rather untidy semi-naked sports volunteers on a pilgrimage to Australia to discover the truth behind Fagan from 'Oliver' and his Missionary activities in Lebanon.
As for me, I enjoyed the serenity of lying on top of the Hotel’s roof where I found a rather entertaining thing to watch. Moths. There are so many of them near bright city lights. Big moths, large moths, tender moths, nice moths, soft moths, attractive moths, tasty moths; I ate one of them. It made my mouth gobber like a teenage Iraqi boy playing Counter Strike.
St George Illawarra lost that game and dear Trent Barrett was “held” once again. Oh I enjoy watching him fail miserably. I only get more joy by watching the annual hobo death match that I organise through the Salvation Army. 12 hobos enter the ring, 1 hobo leaves. Its funny stuff.
On my sojourn through from Newtown to Kogarah, I passed through what is known as Jubilee Avenue waving my Wests Tigers flag and shouting quotes from their forum about how they would beat the team from “boganville”.
Needless to say the fans were not that impressed and I was chased through Kogarah by an angry mob, armed with bucket loads of hot tar, bags of feathers and an earnest desire to adorn us with both.
I woke up the next morning with a rash on the side of my head. Perhaps it was some kind of Avian Influenza, or perhaps it had something to do with the seven frozen chickens that had joined my slumber. The rash suited me, rather much like my William Shatner decorative ornamental Alcove Plate signed by Patrick Stuart.
But nothing else gives me the feeling of Covell scoring a try. Every time he does, I prance gaily around for several minutes. The cream always rises to the top. (Trust me I have spent enough time at Kings Cross to testify to that).
Gonz runs out, and wonders if any of his teammates will care to join him
The Scoreboard at Kogarah
(Based upon the rhyme The House that Jack Built)
The Gonz - Dragon Army
This is the scoreboard at Kogarah.
This is the victory displayed upon the scoreboard at Kogarah.
This is the conversion which sealed the victory displayed on the scoreboard at Kogarah.
This is the try that gave the conversion which sealed the victory displayed on the scoreboard at Kogarah.
This is the video ref who awarded the try that gave the conversion which sealed the victory displayed on the scoreboard at Kogarah.
This is the referee, with seeds of doubt, who deferred to the video ref who awarded the try that gave the conversion which sealed the victory displayed on the scoreboard at Kogarah.
This is the cornerpost all flattened out, which gave the referee his seeds of doubt, who deferred to the video ref who awarded the try that gave the conversion which sealed the victory displayed on the scoreboard at Kogarah.
This is the defender landing atop the cornerpost all flattened out, which gave the referee his seeds of doubt, who deferred to the video ref who awarded the try that gave the conversion which sealed the victory displayed on the scoreboard at Kogarah.
This is the winger with the tryline in sight, who was tackled by the defender using all his might, who landed atop the cornerpost all flattened out, which gave the referee his seeds of doubt, who deferred to the video ref who awarded the try that gave the conversion which sealed the victory displayed on the scoreboard at Kogarah.
This is the offload - a very skilled pass - caught by the winger with the tryline in sight, who was tackled by the defender using all his might, who landed atop the cornerpost all flattened out, which gave the referee his seeds of doubt, who deferred to the video ref who awarded the try that gave the conversion which sealed the victory displayed on the scoreboard at Kogarah.
This is the prop forward being pulled down to his ass, who managed the offload - a very skilled pass - caught by the winger with the tryline in sight, who was tackled by the defender using all his might, who landed atop the cornerpost all flattened out, which gave the referee his seeds of doubt, who deferred to the video ref who awarded the try that gave the conversion which sealed the victory displayed on the scoreboard at Kogarah.
This is the fullback, the last line of defence, pulling the prop forward down on his ass, who managed the offload - a very skilled pass - caught by the winger with the tryline in sight, who was tackled by the defender using all his might, who landed atop the cornerpost all flattened out, which gave the referee his seeds of doubt, who deferred to the video ref who awarded the try that gave the conversion which sealed the victory displayed on the scoreboard at Kogarah.
This is the line break, leaving clear open space, that left the fullback as the last line of defence, who pulled the prop forward down on his ass, who managed the offload - a very skilled pass - caught by the winger with the tryline in sight, who was tackled by the defender using all his might, who landed atop the cornerpost all flattened out, which gave the referee his seeds of doubt, who deferred to the video ref who awarded the try that gave the conversion which sealed the victory displayed on the scoreboard at Kogarah.
This is the halfback, at a blistering pace, who saw the line break, and the clear open space, that left the fullback as the last line of defence, who pulled the prop forward down on his ass, who managed the offload - a very skilled pass - caught by the winger with the tryline in sight, who was tackled by the defender using all his might, who landed atop the cornerpost all flattened out, which gave the referee his seeds of doubt, who deferred to the video ref who awarded the try that gave the conversion which sealed the victory displayed on the scoreboard at Kogarah.
This is the crowd at Kogarah, cheering with delight. They will be celebrating long into the night.
no.5_luke covell comes on and accepts the offload from sasquatch
Once a fan. Always a fan?
"It's not whether you get knocked down, it's whether you get up." – Vince Lombardi
Vince Lombardi was one of the most successful coaches in the history of American football. He was the driving force of the Green Bay Packers, who dominated the National Football League during his tenure as coach.
One of my oldest and longest mates is a ‘lifelong’ bulldogs fan. As youngsters we used to run around in the back yard, him in the old bulldogs strip and me donning my North Sydney Bears jersey. After the 2004 grand final I received a phone call at 3a.m from this very person. When the dogs beat the sharks, I took it on the chin.
In 2005 he was not the same dog (pun defiantly intended). No 3a.m call, no Monday recital of “Who let the Dogs out” and after round 4 this year (When Covell scored a marvellous solo try in a 14 point haul) not one word about the game came out of his mouth. Actions like these led me to think,
His winsome support of his team this season has led me to question, if you are once a fan, will you always be a fan?
I was once a fan of the Zimbabwean all-rounder Craig Wishart.
Craig Wishart’s equanimity during his maiden test centaury was a feature of the 2002/03 season
Wishart’s indefatigable desire to get that first test centaury finally came on his 18th test. His laudable performance on that day set a precedent too all test stars.
But in 2005 the Zimbabwe hero turned his back on his country. I’m no patriotic Zimbabwean but through this act, Craig Wishart is now my 2nd favourite player. My favourite is now Indian Hemang Badaniwho burst onto the scene as a fresh young talent and dominated the 1999 Asian cup.
It is natural for a human to support a team that is winning. After 2003 Penrith’s fan frequently packed out Penrith stadium. Did they come for the glory or come to see an exciting football team? In 2002 Penrith’s average home ground attendance was 11,008, whereas in 2004 an average of 16,836 fans turned up. That’s a rise of 5,828 people in 2 years. Penrith players, management and fans were left wondering where those 5,828 ‘fans’ were in 2002.
Furthermore the connection between Campbeltownand Balmain has grown strongly in 2005 and is only set to grow further in coming years. In 2003 after 10 homes game the Wests Tigers on averaged 8,993 people per game. In 2005, the year of the Tiger and Covell, the Tigers amazingly drew 18,635 to their games at Leichhardt Oval and Campbletown Stadium. In 2006 following a number of quality signings and a trophy in the cabinet, we will see even more ‘fans’ flock to see their beloved Wests Tigers.
After the 2005 grand final Luke Covell showed his support by turning up to the Balmain leagues club at 11p.m to see his mates. He was also spotted in the Daily Telegraph at a Tigers fancy dress party. It’s great to know that NRL superstars still don’t forget their roots. What a character!
This is why I think Cronulla fans are the best in the NRL. To quote a forum member “The [Cronulla] Fans...No band wagoners here, just all fiercely loyal and proud supporters...The best of the best!” I can’t disagree with that.
The years of 2003 and 2004 were not successful in the Shire. Yet on a cold, windy night on the 1st of May 2004, 22,302 Cronulla faithful turned out to Shark Park to see ‘The Local Derby’ vs St George Illawarra. The Cronulla fans stick it through the thick and thin. They stand strong through one after another poor management decisions. They’ll be at Toyota Park week after week, up on the family hill or sitting in the E.T stand.
Will my friend be back in 2006? Will he be sending me his new remix of “Who let the Dogs out”? Will I be shown Sonny Bill-Williams clips till my eyes are sore? Will he pretend to be one of the ‘Dogs Army’ and beat box the drums?
Like Craig Wishart’s illustrious career only time will tell…
Last edited by morri (cWo); 23-11-2005 at 05:25 PM..
BBSF gets it. Steps inside one, steps inside two, steps inside 3. Swerves around a 4th, dummys around another , chips ahead, regathers, falls down, gets back up and keeps running, bulldozes over another , 3 men are trying to tackle him now, hes through all of them, passes to himself, hes down the touchline, its luke covell in full stride, he dives ...is he there????
Luke Covell Stories
After recently catching up with Luke, he was able to tell me about some tales of his life.
Luke’s now famous and successful career in rugby league, began in a year I like to call 2003, where this now famous character from Goondiwindi debuted for the Wests Tigers against a rampaging Newcastle Knights side. Never had I been taken by a player since the golden child of Zimbabwe Cricket Craig Wishart scored 172 not out against a Namibian XI in round 1 of the Cricket World Cup 2003.
But before Luke was a star, the dream began, in the old paddocks of TG Gillers oval in Goondiwindi. Luke will never forget the old backyard matches he had with his sister Sally, his best mate Sam and the local neighbours. The rules were modifed to suit everyone. A few were:
1) No tackling (Girls only)
2) Winners kick
3) No Biting
4) Dummy Half cant score.
But unfortunately when mother Shelley’s backyard was destroyed, the game was taken to the streets and they came up with rule 5. Since they lived in one of Goondiwindi’s busiest streets, where sometimes 5 cars would come by every hour, the team facing the oncoming would call 'car' or ‘bus’ and off they would run.
They all had a dream of playing first grade rugby league, but Luke was the only one with the real talent to do it. Most of the players from those days went onto family jobs, while his good mate Sam spent his life in a wheelchair after a breach in rule 5."
His Father, His Mentor.
When Luke was 12, he got his first coach, when his father Bob took him in to teach him the fundamentals of Rugby League. When queried about this Luke replied “Yes Bob was my first coach and he had some unusual methods, some which bordered on being illegal, however you could not say I was pushed into rugby league. I was given a choice between playing league, or getting the crap kicked out of me". Luke really cared for his father, and reasons he trained so hard, had to with how much he cared for him and wanted to make him proud. "And now as I look back on it, putting him into a retirement village was one of the toughest decisions I ever made as a kid, but with all my sporting honours taking up so much room someone had to go. It was either him or the pool table”.
As a famous rugby league star today, Luke spends a lot of time on the road. "You see a lot of interesting places living the job I do. Its funny all the interesting places you go to. There is no doubting Penrith is a nice place, and I remember playing their once in 2003 to a packed out stadium. Many of their fans had saved all year to afford a ticket ($17)." Said Covell. Penrith are known as a small town really to get behind their local team. "They take their football very serious. This was seen on the paper after they were defeated, a Penrith supporter was so upset he turned a gun into his television before turning the weapon onto his own body. It really shows you how serious some people take rugby league when they are prepared to hurt a TV".
Playing Rugby League with passion like Covell does, you always have to be prepared to take alot of abuse from opposition players. So generally, you must learn to give it back. “There is a certain art of verbal harassment, which is as big a part of rugby league as the scrum or the eye gouge. I know players who have been picked for their sledging and passion alone, like Terry Hill. Some would say its tradition for some of us wingers to get into our opponents ear to try and put them off their game. And you know, through all my experience I have found even the nicest conversations can get some players fire up. Take for example Hazem El Masri. All I had to say to that guy was “How are you mate?” and he would click it. Now that I remember that time, I am surprised the hotel operator put me through to his hotel room, seeing as the time was 4.00 in the morning”.
He is not just a good footballer player, a character too.
The much awaited debut of Horndog is here.
Honrdog is yelling for BBSF to offload. He does but will Horndog get it down?
It was the second Saturday in March 2005 and Rugby Leagues most favourite club, echoed with a rich tradition and past, returned to the field with expectations that this rugby league season, would be one where the Telstra Premiership took a visit somewhere it had not been before, the Sutherland Shire.
A packed out Toyota Park had strode in to see the Cronulla Sutherland Sharks take on another premiership heavyweight, the Penrith Panthers. In an epic battle from start to finish, it was the skill of Kimmorley , Peachey , Covell and Dykes which took the game away from Penrith, as the Sharks prevailed 20-14.
2005, for all that it was worth, was shaping up to be a very exciting year for rugby leagues most unsuccessful club. Never had a squad with this much potency, flair , skill and razzle dazzle graced the lucious green grasses of Toyota Park. The Vision of Dykes, the ‘ill tackle you’ attitude of Nutley , the class of Kimmorley , the ‘put it over the posts’ goalkicking style of Covell and the entertainment of one David Peachey. Yes indeed, the class of 2005 was bigger than ever before.
It was no surprise to the Shire faithful , that the juggernaut would keep rolling on. In round two, a young , long haired blonde , muscles buldging out of his chest, would capture the rugby league worlds attention, when he charged down the touchline like a Siberian Cheetah , outpacing Scott Donald to withhold some four defenders and plant down what would turn out to be the individual try of the year 2005. Never had I been this excited about a player, since the golden child of Zimbabwe Cricket, Craig Wishart smashed 172 not out against a Namibian XI in round one of the 2003 cricket world cup. On this day, the Rugby League world stood up and took notice, as this new sensation had made his mark. Rugby League was better for it.
The juggernaut hit overdrive the next week when the crushed the Parramatta Eels 18-10 at Parramatta, starting a inspirational next two months where the Cronulla Sharks, every mans second favourite team, would win 7 of their next 8 wins to jump to the equal 1st in the premiership.
Along the way, this teams achievements would go noticed, as some of their bigger names in Brett Kimmorley (Australia) , Luke Covell (Country) and Jason Stevens (City) would go on to better and bigger things. Things were looking up for this once laughed upon club.
Monday the 16th of May, and a bombshell hits the shire. The first state of origin teams are announced. Brett Kimmorley is named. But to the shock of him and the world, Peachey, Covell, Nutley, Gallen and Dykes are left out in the cold. How could this be. What happened? Devastation among the players, team morale goes down.
After Brett Kimmorley’s poor origin form and the origin snub that was still hurting many of the other top players the sharks plummeted down the competition ladder. Luke Covell being a simple but yet complex man had one thing to say ‘We’re just not having fun’. From here the sharks won only 2 from 9 games. The early season favourites had almost hit rock bottom.
After Cronulla were defeated by Souths, coach Stuart Raper made his biggest call yet in his short time coaching in the NRL. Luke Covell was dropped. Fans protested outside the leagues club. Yet the very next week Cronulla minus Covell took out a magical match vs Newcastle.
But after two unconvincing performances from winger Nathan Meritt, Covell ‘the boy wonder’ was called back into the team, into the stoplight. Stuart Raper had forgiven Covell for his gambling addiction that almost de-railed his career. Covell was given the role of reviving the Sharks 2005 season.
Then came three wins on the trot for the mighty sharks. One including a 70’s weekend classic match against Manly. 68-6 was the score line. Covell had a 20 point haul in a match where many were giving him man of the match honours. Morale was up. The boys were ‘having fun’.
The McIntyre system came into effect. It was 2nd vs. 7th. Dragons vs. Sharks. Wollongong had never seen a game like it before. When Kimmorley, Covell and Scott combined to score the first try of the match the Cronulla faithful were getting ready for there next weeks match. But it wasn’t to be. Sharks went down 28-22.
750 between the ************ by my count.
Last edited by Horndog_Covell; 23-11-2005 at 08:49 PM..
" Who Are You" , (Ooh Ooh, Ooh Ooh)
“It sounds like a hundred drummers with different drums ,each beating their own rhythm. It sounds like the cacophony of a hundred tribes, each speaking their own tongue. It sounds like a hundred calls to battle” *
In so many homes around the world on Christmas morning 2005 the scene will be much the same. Again. The remnants of wrapping paper that took much more painstaking work in the presentation than was taken in the dismantling .The amount of care taken in unwrapping the paper directly proportional to the age of the gift receiver’s. The scene is not dissimilar to 1985 or 1955 for that matter.
This is contrary to the views of the young. Ask a teenager - any teenager about how things have changed and once you have done enough to attract their attention , they will roll their eyes in unison or point to their gleaming I-pods, new mobile phone with the refrigerated drink attachment as examples. They will, in all likelihood give Dad the usual “poor Dad is still stuck in a time warp” look.
In that little corner of the world that is represented by many New South Wales and Queensland homes, sitting among the labyrinth of crumpled paper, spilled nuts and lolly wrappers something sits crumpled in the corner. It attracts little attention, passed over for the gadgetry. It is Dad’s silent response. The symbol that some things don’t change. It is the symbol of the tribe that this teenager has decided is part of what defines them. It is the final word on which tribe they belong to in the months from March to October. This teenager made their tribal choice many years ago. They made it clear months previously that it was time to update. The fabric is high tech, light weight and colour fast. It is the 2006 prototype of their tribe’s rugby league jumper.
Dad is of the opinion that it is a blatant rip-off as it is near enough to the same as their old one .Yes it has an extra swirl on one shoulder and 2 stripes that their old one didn’t have. He whinges that it is all a none too subtle marketing ploy from the club of their choice and its new sponsors under the transparent guise of a “new look”.
This footy jumper though has this tiny link in their chosen tribe shouting in a mixture of defiant and optimistic tones to the world various things.
What is this teen shouting in silence? Some of these would be close (but in no particular order of likelihood):
“This is part of who I am! If you don’t like it I don’t care!”
“My family has always been supporters of this club - I am with you Dad –this is our year!”
“Get this up you Dad – I hope it pisses you off big time that I am a proud devotee of the team I know you hate most”
“I have the 2006 jumper and my mate will be green with envy as he/she only has the 2005 version!”
“ One thing that is certain is that tribalism was the very first social system that human beings ever lived in, and it lasted much longer than any other kind of society to date.**”
Tribalism is alive and well. For all the things that change some stay the same. Tribalism is one thing that is here to stay.
Rugby League supporters in the 20th and 21st century prove it. Rugby League tribes are clearly less rigidly defined by their geographical location than their immediate tribal forebears but rugby league clubs still rely on, encourage and recognize the benefits of tribalism in its new guises.
Rugby league fan websites owe their very existence to tribalism. Geographical dislocation unites fans from all over the country - indeed other parts of the world. Many of these fans rarely attend a live game but they sit shoulder to shoulder in a “cyber stand of solidarity” sharing opinion, united in their approval of the warriors representing their tribe.
Tribalism is an essential part and capitalised on by the media, the clubs, and most importantly the sponsors. All recognise the value of that little piece of our psyche that so comfortably lets us be willing members of our tribe.
* Excerpt from “The New Tribalism” by Dave Frohnmayer , (President of the University of Oregon).
**Wikipedia http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tribalism “Tribalism”
the great captain covell king hits someone from behind
the greatest coach who never lived
a bottle of jim beam in one hand and a cigarette with one of those long sticks on it in the other
my hair is dishevelled and i havent shaved in 13 days.
im a troubled man, a man on the brink of insanity and in the depths of despair....
why have i fallen from grace you may ask?
simple, i will tell you why.
Ever since the great Luke Covell [hes a player for the sharks) was infamously dumped to the jets mid year it became apparent that the Cronulla Sutherland Sharks need a new coach.
But who on earth could fill this void?
Phil Economidis is living the high life on tweed heads, Chris Anderson is in Wales and Brian Smith is at Parramatta!
i, and many fans can not fathom a replacement
but thats not to say i dont know who should be the new coach.... i wont let anticipation get in the way of a good idea so ill just tell you.
The Jigsaw Killer
Thats right, the old cancer ridden caucasian pretty boy from the movie Saw and Saw 2. For those of you aware of these movies (someone may have seen) they will be able to tell you that Jigsaw mourns "the survival instinct" as a lost element of the human psyche and offers to single-handedly teach flawed individuals how to value life. He does it by making them face death in the most torturous ways possible.
Sound familiar anyone?
maybe a little Brian Johnstone might jog your memory?
yes thats it, now you see why.
For those people who still dont understand (Bulldog supporters) ill explain it further.
Jigsaw strives to teach his players in his games how to survive.
How to dig deep.
He ignites passion,desperation,ticker, motivation!
All elements that the modern day rugby league/sportsmen - save for a few athletes- Luke Covell, Zimbabwean cricketer Craig Wishart[172n.o v Namibia anyone?]- fails to possess.
Can you imagine the scrambling defence, the hits in defence, the Hunger in defence! That desperation to find that tryline!
With Jigsaw, they will find that something extra.
He doesnt to know the ins and outs of the game, thats why he has assistants!!!!
There may be a slight issue of some injuries including death that would need to be smoothed out- but by Gosh he can do it if anyone could-He would be the Guus Hiddink of the Nrl! he could inspire the Sharks to come 6th next year, and that is no mean feat.
Shame its only a movie and hes fictional,
but we can only fantasize.
Last edited by captttaincovell; 23-11-2005 at 09:22 PM..
unlucky dragons. would of loved to see a 5v5.
good luck to both teams. good luck ref.
Last edited by morri (cWo); 23-11-2005 at 09:36 PM..
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