CHRIS Grevsmuhl had the rugby league world at his feet — a starting back-rower for the Penrith Panthers, an Indigenous All Stars representative, a Queensland Origin hopeful.
Then last November, at the age of 23, he walked away from the game, citing “personal reasons”.
In an exclusive interview with The Daily Telegraph, he has broken his silence on the real reasons he left rugby league — revealing the pressure of being an NRL player became so overwhelming he quit for his mental welfare.
He suffered from depression, lost the desire to play and distanced himself from family, friends and teammates — before loved ones and Penrith boss Phil Gould stepped in.
Grevsmuhl on site for his building job in Orange. Photo: Mark Evans
After requesting a release from the Panthers, Grevsmuhl, who celebrates his 24th birthday on Thursday, now lives in Orange working as a builder and
helping out the local footy side.
“I hit rock bottom and I had to walk away from the game for myself,” Grevsmuhl said.
“You sort of get consumed by it and all the processes that come with it. Footy is a job, you do lose the love for it and it’s not fun anymore.
“It’s exactly like going to work and it became too much in the end. I don’t blame anyone else. I blame myself for just losing the love for it and just not wanting the pressures.
“I’d reached my low and I didn’t see it, but luckily there were people around me that could see it and they helped me get back to the great mindset and appreciating everything a bit more.
“I’m loving life away from footy.”
Grevsmuhl wouldn’t be where is today without the support of his family and friends.
He says his partner and grandparents noticed his dismissive behaviour and implored him to act.
But Grevsmuhl didn’t fully realise the seriousness of his problem until Gould pulled him aside.
“It took Gus to come and sit me down and tell me to wake up to myself and that I’ve got more to live for,” he said. “Football isn’t everything and it got me back to where I am now. Gus is wonderful and I really appreciated that.”
Grevsmuhl lives in Orange with his fiancee, who hails from the area. As well as working as a builder,
he has been training with Orange CYMS offering his advice and experience.
“All we do is play footy, it’s not like we are superstars,” he said. “I’m enjoying being treated normally.
“I can go to work and have a beer afterwards with mates, my life isn’t strict anymore.
“Coming through the grades as a player you miss out on that life when you are younger. It’s all about professionalism and you have to meet the demands.”
Grevsmuhl is enjoying his life out of the NRL spotlight. Photo: Mark Evans
Grevsmuhl says the pressure to perform is so intense that players are forced to conform.
“There are also so many f ...-ups off the field in the game today and blokes try to change the way they are,” he said.
“That pressure builds up and it all just breaks down in the end and that’s what happened to me.
“It’s a tough lifestyle and you have to be really committed.
“It’s weird you play football at the highest level, but you just don’t want to watch it, you don’t want to do anything.
“You go to training during the day and then you want to get as far away from it as you can. It consumes your whole life and you think that is it.
“Now I’m just appreciating everything a bit more.”
Grevsmuhl is in a better place thanks to the support of the NRL, which has provided him with a psychologist and employment prospects. The RLPA has also been in constant contact to monitor his mental state.
He says he isn’t alone and there are countless other players struggling with life as an NRL player. He has had footy mates commit suicide and says it’s a serious issue the game and society must address.
“Everyone has tough times in the game,” he said. “It’s not only first graders, it’s a lot of younger blokes that aren’t making the grade and are calling it quits early.
“We need to encourage people to speak. It shouldn’t come down to the last option.
“I know a lot of players who have committed suicide and I’ve lost a couple of good mates over the last three or four years. It isn’t good and it sinks you down even lower into a bad point.”
While he’d like to return to the NRL, Grevsmuhl stresses he is in no rush. The Integrity Unit is looking at his mental welfare with the Gold Coast keen to sign him.
“That’s the challenge for the blokes who are feeling that way and want to go out and get help and make sure their lives outside of football are good again,” he said.
“You need to enjoy yourself, because in the end it’s a 20-year period if you are good from juniors to first grade until you retire. Then there is another 40 years after that. In the end it’s only a short span in the NRL and that’s why blokes can struggle when they retire.”
