Round 1 (2008) Bluebags v Panthers

[Willow]

Forum 7s - Round 1 2008
NEWTOWN BLUEBAGS v PENRITH PANTHERS

-v-

Game Thread:
* Please note - This is a game thread only, therefore only game posts can be made here (Teams, Articles).
* Any other posts may result in loss of points and is at the discretion of the referee.
* Only original articles, not used in previous games, will be marked by referees.

Naming Teams:
* 5v5 + 2 reserves each
* No 'TBA' or changing players named
* Captains must stick with original teams named

ALL THE RULES & REGULATIONS: http://f7s.leagueunlimited.com/rules.php

FULL TIME: Wednesday 26 March 2008 at 9pm (Syd time)
REFEREE: The Colonel
Venue: HENSON PARK

**The Referee Blows Game On!**

CLICK HERE FOR OFFICIAL WORD COUNTER​

 

[Willow]

The Bluebags bus arrives and the players disembark to a huge reception before making tracks to the Henson Park Hotel.

TEAM - NEWTOWN BLUBAGS - ROUND 1, 2008

Gorilla (vc)
Lossy
Black Kitty
Drew-Sta
Rexxy

Res:
Timmah
Willow (c)
DaveQ

 

[Big Mick]

The Panthers take the field for the first time this season in front of a hostile crowd at Henson Park. The Panthers struggled with consistency last year but proved a thorn in the side to most teams. They have been training the house down in the off-season and what better way to start than to be up against the undefeated premiers of 2007, the Bluebags.

PANTHERS TEAM ROUND 1 2008 VS NEWTOWN

1) Madunit ( c )
2) [Furrycat] ( c )
3) Leaguenut ( c )
4) The Piper ( c )
5) Azkatro ( c )

Res:
6) Big Mick
7) Spike

 

[LeagueNut]

LeagueNut (Panthers)

Paul's Story
Part One - Under Pressure

Paul knew he was on his last chance.

He’d been in and out of first grade for much of the season – mostly out. A few games as a fill-in for injury and suspension was nowhere near enough to keep the club interested in extending his contract.

There had been no other interest either. He knew an NRL career would be fleeting, but he never thought his dream would be over by the age of 23.

His coach had been patient, but it was very clear that this patience was running out. Paul had been signed from an out-of-town club and was supposed to be the next big thing, but his star had fallen quickly since then. The harder he tried, the worse it got – the ultimate Catch 22.

When the regular halfback was suspended for a week Paul knew it was “now or never” time. There was even a rumour going around that the coach would bypass Paul and pick someone else to fill the gap. Paul showed up at training as focused as he had ever been – he was going to make it impossible for the coach to pick anyone else.

Unfortunately the League Gods had other ideas. Dropped balls, bad passes, kicks woefully off target, a 3/10 goalkicking practice … it wasn’t looking good. Even the coach gave him “the look” during training – a look that clearly said “sorry mate, but there’s no way I can pick you on that performance”.

After training Paul headed to the beach to get away and clear his head. As he sat on the rocks staring into the vacant sky he heard someone approaching, and sat up to see who had found him all the way out here.

He was an old gent, easily over 60. He carried a dark bag by his side, and managed to keep a cap on his head despite the coastal breezes. The sharp contrast of his pink fingers poking through the holes of his black fingerless gloves made it look like his hands were floating. He walked slowly towards Paul, smiling and peering through two half-closed eyes.

“I’ve been watching you”

Paul didn’t say anything and prepared to leave. He’d seen enough nutters during his time in the top grade to know this conversation wouldn’t turn out well.

“I can help, you know”. The stranger patted his bag.

Paul was struck by the tone of his voice. There was a lot of knowledge in there, a voice of wisdom and reassurance. Paul raised an eyebrow and waited for the stranger to continue.

The bag was opened and a ball was pulled out. It looked like a proper regulation ball as well, complete with advertising logos.

“Kick it”

Paul still hadn’t said a word. The stranger tossed him the ball and nodded out to sea.

‘Ah what the hell – he’s probably some senile old coot who won’t remember anything anyway. I’ll give him a thrill.’

Paul hoisted the largest bomb that he could, and stepped back to admire the distance. It had certainly gone a LONG way up – and Paul cursed himself for not being able to do that at training.

But something was wrong. The ball wasn’t coming down. Paul stood there, transfixed, as the ball spun over and over itself while hanging in the air, unaffected by the breeze or the forces of gravity.

Paul glanced at the stranger, who was busy flicking around with some sort of remote control. His pink fingers moved effortlessly across the small black box as he looked up at Paul and winked.

“Pretty flash aye?”

Paul did a double take. Was this guy seriously controlling the ball? He looked up and saw his monster bomb slowly coming back down to earth like a feather, floating back and forth in the breeze. Eventually it dropped into his arms.

“It feels just like a real ball doesn’t it?”

Paul spun the ball around in his hands and caught it a few times. It certainly felt real to him – no heavier or lighter than a normal game ball.

The realisation began to slowly sink in. Paul held the ball as he slowly looked up at the stranger, who was smiling at him by now – showing several crooked teeth in the process.

“Told you I could help you. Shall we talk?”

To be continued …

737 words in the official counterhttp://f7s.leagueunlimited.com/images/jersey_panthers_1.gif

 

[gorilla]

Incense smoke wafts around the ground and the chiming of bells and chants of the faithful reverberate across the seating. Gorilla rises from the downward dog position, slautes the sun and shambles onto the field of blood.

******************************************************************

Go the Monks !

This week’s match between the Tibetan Monks and the Chinese People is shaping up to be a real grinding, knock ‘em down game. The Tibetan capital of Lhasa is hosting the People in the traditional neighbors grudge match against the Monks.

Previous matches have seen displays of fireworks by the People’s fans and the Monks’ fans, resplendent in the team colours of red and yellow, rampaging about the stadium yelling slogans, trashing shops, banks and government offices.

Eye-witness reports at the Tibetans’ clubhouses in northern India say that training has been conducted in secrecy this last week, with a new rushing and storming technique, moving away from the expected adoption of the grappling guerilla tactics previously favoured by last year's Premiers, the Iraqi Snipers.

The Chinese Peoples’ team has so far been refusing to hold press conferences with the Peoples’ coach Zhang Qingli, along with the coaching team of un-named senior central government security officials, expected to keep their team list private until kick-off.

The Tibetan Monks’ coach, the Dalai Lama, (winner of the Rothmans 1989 Nobel Coaching Prize) has said he only wants greater autonomy for the Monks in their use of home ground, but is prepared to put everything on the line, one game at a time until victory.

Peoples’ coach Zhang Qingli has refused appeals by the Monk’s coach and club secretary to have joint press conferences and dialogue with the Dalai Lama, vowing to smash the Monks at the match in Tibet.

The recently published “Scroll of Feuds” has enflamed the relations between the People and Monks’ teams with the match expected to be a bloodbath, played in memory of the anniversary of the 1959 bloody Monks’ upset win against Beijing's control of the game.

The season kicked off with a controversial advertising campaign comprised of a new theme song: “The People shall reclaim the land that has always been their homeland” and the use of up to 30 prominent Chinese writers and intellectuals who signed a letter to their government urging them to ‘Play that Flute, Ref’.

The Monks’ supporters sought to drown out the season launch with their chants and use of bells and incense, coupled with the now-famous game songs of “We want freedom – when do we want it – NOW” and “We are Tibetans” – clap, clap, clap-clap-clap. The sea of red and yellow Tibetans also formed a human chain at the season launch with the low rumble of tanks in the background, drowning out one of the fan’s songs – ‘All we are saying, is give peace a chance’.

Neutral game referee, the United States’ Condoleezza Rice warned the Peoples’ team against strong handed defensive tactics and the use of the grapple tackle and sought a free-flowing match. The Indian and Russian touch judges have both remained silent on the expected large numbers of Peoples’ supporters invading the pitch, but it is expected that, with the match being held at the Tibetan’s home grounds, the Monks’ will be out in force.

Live coverage of the match in China has been restricted with limited television exposure and a complete blackout of the match proposed by the Peoples’ club hierarchy. Access has also been blocked to You Tube after dozens of match highlight video clips of recent training runs in Tibet appeared on the free-to-air website. The blocking has compounded the lack of the Peoples’ fans’ understanding of the Monks’ form and likely team tactics, although these have been openly available to Monks’ supporters attending training sessions in Lhasa.

It is understood that the Chinese government has commenced a study of the successful removal of the South Sydney Rabbitohs from the NRL in the Australian competition, after decades of unsuccessful attempts to deregister the Monk’s team.

Monasterial clubhouses in the provinces of Sichuan, Gansu and Qinghai have been sealed off by the Peoples’ administrative team in an attempt to keep loyal fans from expressing their support in what is expected to be a "life and death" struggle for the Monks’ supporters.

There’s only one victor expected in this match, so get out your red and yellow scarf and remember – there are no bombs allowed in the stadium.

******************************************************************
700 words between the stars

 

[madunit]

madunit for Panthers, has played every club game since Round 1, 2007.

Days Of Our Lives

Throughout the hundred years of Rugby League in Australia there have been many controversies. Most involving drugs, rape, money, sex, deceit, theft, false medical conditions, sauce, the list goes on.

But one incident tops all of these. One incident involving adultery, attempted murder, depression, attempted suicide, divorce, the end of a sportsman’s career and a forbidden love. An incident that would have the script writers of ‘Days Of Our Lives’ salivating.

Bobby Lulham was born in Newcastle in 1926 and started playing Rugby League as soon as he could. He moved to Sydney to play for Balmain in 1947. Lulham was an outstanding winger for Balmain immediately. In his debut season he became the season’s top tryscorer with 28 tries, which is a Balmain club record for most tries in a season, still to this day.

In his debut year he was selected for New South Wales in all 4 games, as well as playing for Balmain in their 13-7 Grand Final win over Canterbury. A year later he made his debut for Australia in the third test against Great Britain. He scored a try on debut, however Australia lost 23-9. He played two more tests against France on the 1948-49 Kangaroo tour.

Everything pointed towards Lulham becoming a superstar in the mould of Blinkhorn, Horder and Wearing.

Until the 1953 season.

1953 started well for Lulham, he was in good form and Balmain were performing reasonably well. On July 18, Balmain lost to Canterbury 14-7, and it was noticed that Lulham’s performance was well below his usually consistent high standard. He told the Balmain officials that he just had an off day, which they accepted and nothing more was said of the matter.

Once Lulham got home, he called his doctor to come to his house and try and figure out what was wrong with him. His doctor came to the conclusion Lulham had a stomach ulcer.

This is where the story gets interesting.

Two days after the loss to Canterbury, and with Lulham bedridden, the NSWRL doctor received an anonymous phone call from a woman, who claimed her husband had put poison in Lulham’s beer before the game against Canterbury. The doctor immediately notified the police. Lulham was consequently relocated to hospital as his condition continued to deteriorate.

The police knew immediately that Lulham had been the victim of thallium poisoning when they noticed that his hair was falling out. It was revealed that Lulham had consumed over half of the lethal dosage amount of Thallium, commonly found in rat poison.

Once this information was revealed, the public and media went into a frenzy. Claims were aplenty, many believing Lulham had tried to poison himself.

Two weeks after the discovery, Lulham’s mother-in-law Veronica Monty, was charged with attempted murder. It was heard in court that she had sat down with Lulham and made them both a warm drink. She wanted to talk with him about their relationship.

In 1951, Veronica had seperated from her husband and had nowhere to live, so Bobby and his wife Judith, agreed to let her stay with them.

Over time, Bobby and Veronica developed an intimate relationship. Eventually the guilt Veronica was feeling about deceiving her daughter had got her very depressed and she felt she had to do something before she ruined her daughter’s marriage.

When she decided to talk to Bobby, she intended to tell him that she couldn’t live with the guilt anymore. She had decided she would put rat poison into her drink and kill herself.

Unfortunately, the drinks became mixed up and Bobby consumed the poisoned beverage.

Once Lulham had recovered almost a month later, he gave evidence in court admitting he had been involved in an intimate relationship with his mother-in-law.

Things didn’t improve from there. The illness had rendered Lulham too weak to play first grade anymore and he was forced to retire. Veronica Monty, after being arrested, had taken thallium and was immediately admitted to hospital. Once cured, Veronica’s husband filed for divorce. Shortly after, Bobby’s wife Judith also filed for divorce.

Lulham passed away in 1980.

Not from thallium though.

…and these are the days of our lives.

Bobby Lulham career statistics

Balmain (1947-53) Played 85, 85 Tries, 85 Goals, 345 Points
New South Wales (1947-49) Pl 9, 8T, 24 Pts
Australia – Tests (1948-49) Pl 3, 1T, 3 Pts
Australia – Tour Matches (1948-49) Pl 15, 11T, 33 Pts
TOTAL (1947-53) Pl 112, 105 Tries, 45 Goals, 405 Pts

750 Words including title using the official F7's word counter.

Sources
Sydney Morning Herald Archives
The Encyclopedia of Rugby League Players by Alan Whiticker and Glen Hudson
The ABC of Rugby League by Malcolm Andrews.

 

[Willow]

Ref please note run-on team change:
Rexxy - out
Willow - in

 

[The Piper]

The Piper for the Panthers
-----------------------------------------

The New Adventures of the Rugby League Cops:

White Jersey Blue

‘The Clean Out’

Jay Laga’aia as Sergeant Anthony Puletua
Colin Friels as Detective Senior Constable Luke Priddis
Rodger Corser as Constable Jarrod Sammut
Tammin Sursok as Constable Amanda Flynn
Aaron Pedersen as Senior Constable Michael Jennings
And Gary Sweet as Chief Inspector Coach

Scene – CUA Station, Penrith (Crime Undercover Association)

Previously, in the last episode…
It was some years ago now, back in 2003 that the undercover officers of Penrith made history with one of the biggest police busts of all time; single handedly bringing down the biggest crime syndicate in Sydney themselves. Experiencing great success that year as well as the year after, the team was the best the crime stopping league had to show.
Today, the squad had lost some of their superstars and the officers remaining from those great years were not performing to the best of their ability. Ending 2007, every other team was above them in performance level. Something had to be done.

***

A surprise visit from Chief Inspector Coach, all the way from the country’s capital, stuns all the officers stationed out west of Sydney. And the Chief Inspector wasn’t here for a social call. He walked in to the office of Sergeant Puletua, closely followed by a young man in uniform. Puletua and Detective Priddis both stood to greet the man newly in charge.

“Chief Inspector Coach, what a pleasant surprise,” Puletua welcomed him.

“Gentlemen,” Coach wasted no time beginning his introduction. “I’ve been asked to step in at this point in time to help your efforts controlling crime in your community. It’s been sometime since you’ve been successful and the Penrith people want answers.”

The younger officer is introduced. “Sergeant, Detective, this is Constable Sammut. I’ve brought him up from the lower grades of this association. I think he’s just one officer that will become a household name in the near future.”
The three greet one another.

Coach said as he pulled out some papers to read off. “I’ve also been looking over recent case files and have found interesting statistics. You have an officer by the name of Jennings in your ranks?”

“Yes we do,” confirmed Priddis.

“Impressive stats,” said Coach. “Has run down many criminals on foot. Squeezes through the gaps to get the undercover information. Put many perpetrators behind cross bars.”
As he puts the papers down, he ends with, “This is the kind of officer we can build a team around.”

Puletua seemed pleased but perplexed. “The new officers are a wonderful inclusion, but we don’t have enough room for all of them. What about the older members who brought down the Bondi Boys syndicate in 03?”

“That is in the past, Sargeant,” Coach snapped. “Five years ago. No ones questioning that you weren’t outstanding in those triumphant years, because the whole squad was. You’re efforts today shouldn’t make us overlook what you did in 2003. But the clear fact is that the large majority of the syndicate busting team is not up to scratch at this point in time. Now it’s time. Time to move on. It’s time to clean out. You two, for example. You’ve not preformed anywhere near what we’ve come to expect of you. If there is not enough room in the team for everyone, it’s the ones who aren’t producing good police work that need to go.”

Priddis looked at Coach intently. “What are you saying, Coach?”

“I’m saying,” Coach said with great apprehension, “That there are going to be big changes at CUA Station. Senior Constable Wesser has already been transferred to make way for the up and comers. I’m suggesting a transfer for you, Sargeant; OKI Jubilee Station needs a large leader like you there. Detective, you’ll find you’re the newest member of the Windsor Drug Squad.”

The two team members were stunned. They’d been there for so long. With a new Chief Inspector in charge, this happens all of a sudden. But their poor form could not be denied. They had many opportunities to prove themselves as first grade officers, but in their specific roles, both men were not doing what they were expected to do.

Sargeant Puletua and Detective Senior Constable Priddis packed their belongings and then moved out.

Coach was on the phone immediately.
“Get me Senior Constable Aiton. I’ve got a position to offer him.” He ended the call and turned to Sammut.

“Mate, this is the start of a new era at Penrith.”

750 words says the official word counter

 

[Lossy]

Lossy for the Bluebags. Locked, cocked and ready to... sleep, actually.

-----------------------
Hey Jealousy

You’re jealous. Go on, admit it. I am too, sometimes, but not as bad as you. I read your posts as you talk about what should be done, and what you’d do in the same situation. Of course, you’d never be in said same situation. A simple lack of talent, you see.

Jarryd Hayne, Weller Hauraki, and Junior Paulo were out until 4-am in Kings Cross. Apparently they were… drinking, and, get this, regular humans were too. In a night-club of all places. There was an altercation that resulted in no charges being laid against any player, and later a shot was fired, but by someone else. Mark Gasnier was also mentioned. That’s, like, four NRL players out on the town; almost an epidemic. We should stockpile vaccines and implement an inoculation programme immediately. How dare these young, talented individuals go out and have fun. What’s that you say? But… but… they're professional sportsmen? They should prostrate themselves before us and subsist in a humdrum manner in order to play for pay? Here, let me wipe the dribble from your quivering bottom lip.

Most don't get paid more than others professions - and really, what use are lawyers and estate agents? - but they do get paid more than your average Ken and Barbie because they entertain and do the hard work themselves. Their talent isn’t mass-produced by seven year-olds, imported from China and flooded into retail stores. They aren’t in the service industry shuffling bits of paper, satisfied to be an office drone. A clone. People labouring at the end of a shovel, physical as it is, just aren't interesting enough to pay money to watch.

As with others before them, this latest batch has been singled out as irresponsible and reckless. And? I’ve chided Tim Smith and Craig Gower for acting like dick-heads previously but there’s nothing actually wrong with that. Annoying, sure, but not illegal. Gower was treading on dangerous ground in the charity event bottle/grope incident, but no Pearce put-up, so we all should’ve shut-up.

The outcry seems to encourage players to essentially become more monastic, even, dare I say it, more Mormon. The wet-dream of a quietly-spoken, skilled football player with no vices is alive and well. There’s an idea for your Central Coast team, Mr.Gallop, the Terrigal Teetotallers. Latter Day Saints sponsorship should be a shoo-in. No gambling or drinking problems, and phenomenal coverage every time a star player returns from their two-year service. It’s also a great way of always being under the salary cap. Over-budget? Here’s your bicycle, Krisnan, got your pamphlets?

No-one who works for someone, regardless of how much they get paid, should be owned by their employer, let alone fined $2000 for supposedly tarnishing league's image. Forget contract stipulations. Players train to shine for the public 80 minutes a week. What they do beyond their field, training, and promotional obligations is their business. Leave them be. A club that sets down a curfew while at home (one on the road is slightly more acceptable) is a weak one. Clubs: If you can’t handle people being themselves, given the spirit of team that should be present anyway, please leave and chase an A-league franchise. If someone plays badly, simply don't re-sign them. You're not the type of person needed to run the game. Go and psychometrically profile somewhere else, and take your counsellor with you.

Do we really want our heroes to be flawless? Urinating in public may be unsavoury, but I bet Willie Mason knows it's good for citrus trees. Variety is the spice of life, apparently, and our work-only ethic doesn't wash. But instead we punish. Penance is the new black.

The ideals people now hold dear champion sameness and safety. The list of things a player shouldn't do is trumpeted by those cloistered in 9 to 5 wage-slavery because they begrudge someone else their achievements and cling lifelessly to meaningless rules. They covet another life. One that’s full of enjoyment and revelry, not depression and boredom. The spirit of team, rather than nights watching So You Think You Can Dance Australia just so they can talk to their colleagues over a cut lunch.

We all reflect on yesteryear wondering what might have been. If players make mistakes and look back thinking what might have been if only they hadn’t of got that blow-job in a public toilet, that’s fine. If we complain about it, it’s not. It’s petty, and, in that particular case, probably envy.


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There are 748 words between the lines, according to the F7s word counter.

 

[Black Kitty]

Black Kitty for the Bluebags. Squaring up with the giants of the game… but feeling more like a bunny in headlights!

*****

Mate v’s Mate?

You’ve got the Steeden clutched to your chest. The opposition is running toward you. Your running toward them. The moment of impact is milliseconds away. What is it that you are thinking?

Are you thinking anything at all? Is it all just action and reaction? Are you only thinking of making it through the imminent collision of bodies? Maybe it’s all just so second nature that your singing the chorus to the last song you heard on the radio? Over and over again because for the life of you the rest of the words just aren’t computing right now. Maybe your thinking that this man that’s about to dig his shoulder into your ribcage was running with you to do the same to someone else only a short six months ago?

Watching Petero Civoniceva facing off against the Broncos I couldn’t help but wonder what he was thinking. I wondered what his ex-team mates were thinking. Did Petero, and any of the dozens of men to make a similar change before him, ever have that moment of doubt and indecision before playing their old team? or did the playing of the game just take over? Did the game over ride years of camaraderie? Did his former team mates take more or less satisfaction from dumping him to the ground in a bone jarring tackle now that he was a traitor to their ranks? Did they even see his move as traitorous? After all he did leave them. Does that mean he thought his new team better than the one he left? Or was money a bigger lure than mates and loyalty? Or was there some part of him that just didn’t like his old team mates? Or is it more that life moves on and his old team understands that things need to change for people to grow? And after the mud and blood stained antics on the field they are all just mates again. Lovers of the same great game who just happen to oppose each other for 80 minutes a week.

It seems to me that players are forever changing teams, except for the odd few exceptions that seem to be extremely loyal to the colours they wear and would not dream of anything different. Of course there are the other type of players that just seek fortune and fame and will go to whomever will pay them the most and are constantly seeking the spotlight. Players like Willie Mason. I think it would be quite safe to say that he doesn’t think about much at all. Period. And for some reason I can’t really see his team mates actually feeling the loss of his leaving them. The teams reputation would instantly get a boost just for the lack of having him there.

Does that in itself matter when you are charging someone down? If you see them as a blemish on the game you obviously love, or you see them as a traitor to the team you call your brothers, does it make you even more determined to make sure they get a mouth full of stadium turf? Or is it the same no matter who it is in those opposing colours? When the full time whistle blows do you go back the locker rooms and sigh over your loss, or cheer over your win, then all meet for a nice cold sooner at the closest pub?

Perhaps the simple answer to all my questions is that I over think the whole scenario? But surely these things must factor in a players mindset. Surely somewhere in the back of their minds they are thinking that perhaps they should take it a bit easier on this or that opponent because only weeks ago they were running for the same team, or training under the same blistering sun urging each other to push the limits.

In the end, the answer rests with the player. It rests with their ability to separate their mates from their hates and their game from their life. It rests with how the player sees himself. And it rests with how he sees his mates and his team. It rests with individual personalities and their ability to separate themselves from their life off the field once that whistle blows. Mostly it rests with the realisation that their mates wear many colours, and that once off that field they are all part of the greater picture that is Rugby League.

*****

747 words, including title, according to the official word counter

 

[Drew-Sta]

Drew-Sta charges onto the ball from the Bluebags, taking it straight up the middle!!

---

"Til death do us part..."

I’ve been married for about 10 years now. I always had a few ideas about my marriage and what I wanted it to be. Marriage is serious, you know. So I guess it’s fair to say that when I tied the knot, I was a little hesitant because it happened all too quickly.

I mean, we had been dating for many years and have a few kids together, but it seemed to me as though our parents were more interested in us getting married for the benefits it would bring them rather than just letting us come together in our own time, or even just let us keep dating. Sure, she was having trouble paying her bills, and her business was starting to go under financially, but even so she could have been a stay-at-home mum and lived with me. But her parents and my parents were totally against that idea and really wanted to join both the businesses for some reason; I think they wanted her to be seen as doing something.

So we joined both our businesses, and both our parents said we’d become the most powerful business in our field. Even so, things haven’t been going too well. The results have been up and down, and our manager just isn’t getting the best out of our employees. I keep saying that we should replace him, but our parents think that’s not the answer.

I’m a bit worried at what my wife does each day too. She always tells me that things will pick soon, and so do our parents, but all she keeps doing is borrowing money, and her business isn’t getting the results we originally thought it would. I wish she’d help pay some of the bills. It’s getting harder to prop up the family on my income alone. Our parents are always interfering as well. Honestly, some of the decisions they’re making are just crazy.

My parents don’t like it when I’m helping our kids. They tend to want my wife to do it. They keep saying I’m not very good at raising them. I don’t understand that; I thought I was doing a pretty good job. They used to play games against kids from other neighbourhoods and show a lot of spirit and pride. Now the majority of them don’t look very interested when they play. I think they also get upset with how our parents treat them and end up moving away from us, which is sad.

We always seem to have money troubles lately as well. See, that’s the type of marriage that I didn’t want to get involved in and that’s why I was so unsure about getting married to her in the first place. I mean, I have a beautiful place I call home, but I hardly see it these days. We spend most of our time down at my wife’s or at other strange places.

My parents house is a little bit run down too because they just aren’t taking care of it. They closed down their big dining room as well. We used to be quite the entertainers when I was younger and had lots of bands come to our place. All our friends would come over and enjoy themselves and the place used to make me feel proud.

The people that come over these days don’t talk much. They just like to watch the same movie over and over again. You know the one, ‘Queen of the Nile’. It gets boring after a while but my parents think we should keep watching it even though less people are coming around to see it. Now the Government says we have to pay more taxes and can’t smoke any more. I think that’s made it harder for my parents, because they cut in half how much money they were giving my business and have been looking worriedly at their bank statements.

My parents keep getting me to wear this funny clothing as well, not just when we’re out and about but also when we’re at home. It’s this funny red thing that looks like a Liverpool soccer shirt. I don’t like it very much. I honestly prefer the white jumper with a big Red V, but my parents say I need to diversify my fashion for some reason.

I don’t think I like being married much. I wish I were single again. I’m not the same as I used to be.

---

748 according to the Official Word counter

 

[Azkatro]

Azkatro for the Panthers.
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ATTENTION

This is a call to arms, for all men, women and children of Rugby League.

Five score years ago, an historic event occurred in this country that defined an important part of who we are today. Few could have realised back in those dark times what freedoms we now enjoy today without fear or prejudice. But realise some men did, and it was with great sacrifice that these men – our founding fathers – forged into reality what we now know as the game of Rugby League.

History hints at the unspoken and almost mysterious force that those who defend the game find from within. From the earliest days, the noble spirit of Rugby League kept it strong through times of emotional and financial uncertainty. This spirit has seen it survive through almost every evil imaginable. It is this spirit that men and women who fought these demons found from within, that we all hold within ourselves. We must take this noble spirit and use it to continue the fight, and to forever defend the honour of Rugby League.

In these enlightened times, we celebrate with excitement the one hundred year anniversary of our game. But we cannot forget the sacrifices that have been made over the years, nor can we forget the men who have fought so hard and spilled so much blood for Rugby League. It is the great feats of these men that have forged the spirit and passion that embodies our game. They have protected our game against threats from both outside and from within. And over the decades, the pride that has been built up has made the game stronger than ever. They, and us, have built a fortress that can stand up to the mightiest foe.

It is today that I call on you, the men, women and children who have ever felt the passion that is in our game, for there is a new enemy on the horizon. Our spies indicate that the enemy is planning attacks on our very heartland, both to the north and to the west.

This threat cannot be taken lightly. Our defences are strong, but we must never rest. It is a new age we live in, an age in which the enemy can infiltrate our very homes despite our best defences. We must never rest. It can betray our young and our weak willed, and turn them against us. We must never rest. It can deceive our very own scribes at the drop of a hat. We must never rest. It can turn our broth sour at the very mention of its name. We must never rest!

We have learnt much from our own game. We must use this knowledge to turn our defence into attack, to fight them in ways they could never imagine! They are many in number, and they are strong willed, but they are notoriously stupid of mind. We must fight to their weaknesses and to our own strengths. We must fight with growing confidence and strength in the air. We shall fight on beaches, to the north, and in the streets and on the hills, to the west. We shall never surrender!

We must be prepared for attacks on all fronts at any time. We must place trust in our closest allies and stay true to our game and our ideals. It is not just a fight for Rugby League, but it is a fight for all that is right and good in the world.

If you are silent, then you must speak out. If you are weak, you must find strength from your allies, from the spirit of Rugby League, and from within. If the enemy challenges you, whether on our televisions, or on our fields, or even in our conversations, we must fight at all cost. We must never hesitate and we can never back down or surrender. For if the enemy were to win, we would surely die. It is a cancerous demon that will not only destroy our bodies but also our mind and our very soul.

Yes, my friends, our game is stronger than ever, but we must never rest. For the moment we rest is the moment the enemy makes us pay. If you truly feel the spirit and passion for Rugby League that exists in so many of us, you must stay strong and fight.

They may take our bandwagoners, and our television ratings, but they will never take our game!

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747 words. Liftoff!

 

[[furrycat]]

Furrycat rushes in for the Panthers.
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Hey, I'm really a cockroach through and through... bro.

A cockroach, a cane toad and a kiwi walk into a bar, so what do they all have in common? Well lets look past the fact that each can be used to describe someone in a derogatory manner, but look at how each represents three very different cultures striving for a common goal: perfection. Three separate football groups who want to stand high above the rest and stamp their dominance on the game. Three teams that simply want to be the pinnacle of Rugby League.

Sonny Bill Williams stunned the rugby league community by publicly announcing this week that he wants to be the first Kiwi to be allowed to play State of Origin— the pinnacle of rugby league that is characterised by its rivalry between two very competitive Australian states. The part that perplexes me, and many other people, is that just four years ago in 2004 Sonny Bill was quoted saying:
"State of Origin is a battle between two rival Australian states, and it has been a tradition that has gone on for many years. I'd love to play it, but we're Kiwis, so there is no way we should". Has Sonny Bill conveniently forgotten what he said just a few years ago, or has he already employed the "Speak then think then lick your contact lens then put it in your eye" philosophy of Anthony Mundine?

Two questions immediately come to mind:
1. What injury would Sonny Bill get just before Origin?
2. Why should Kiwis be allowed to play in a series between two rival Australian states?
Firstly, I have no doubt that Sonny Bill would be ruled out with an ingrown toe nail.
Secondly, they shouldn’t be allowed to play.

Okay, so I’ll admit it; it would be fantastic to see the likes of Sonny Bill or Benji Marshall playing at their best in a series that is a highlight of the Australian sporting calendar, but think for a second; think of the following headline.

"Sonny Bill Williams named at lock for NSW"

Looks good doesn't it? Now think of the poor young New South Welshman (his name is Eugene), born and bred in his beloved state, now pushed out of the Origin side because he just can't compete with the likes of an international superstar such as Sonny Bill Williams. That is just one repercussion. Now this youngster doesn't get a chance to experience the excitement, the elation and the pure adrenaline of State of Origin. Willie Tonga, an Australian and Queensland centre, said that experiencing Origin turned his career around and improved his skills beyond belief. Had he not played Origin, Tonga said it was very possible he may have given up the game to pursue other goals. Poor Eugene has missed out on an opportunity of a life time. His football has suffered, he decides he wants to quit, and ends up working at a Mobil service station out of Energy Australia Stadium. Or worse, he could end up playing with some of the c**ks at the Roosters.

Maybe I am being a little melodramatic, but State of Origin is the pinnacle of AUSTRALIAN rugby league. It is a thrill that many young rugby league players aspire to achieve, and is a step away from putting on that coveted Kangaroos jersey. Sonny Bill Williams is incorrect in saying that it is the absolute pinnacle of rugby league. He may like to think that, but with a little work and dedication by the players and authorities, international rugby league should be the most prestigious event a player could be involved in. Why can't we look at international rugby league and say it is an exhibition of the best players currently in the game? Why do most fans prefer State of Origin football to the Tri-Nations? Why is it that the Tri-Nations doesn’t interest many league supporters? It’s simple; the players aren't taking it seriously enough. Many choose to sit out because their clubs would prefer they don't play. And now we have Kiwis wanting to play State of Origin football.

As a Kiwi, I know my arguments are probably a bit complex for many Kiwis to understand, so I will simplify it.

New South Wales = Australia
Queensland = Australia
Sonny Bill Williams = New Zealand
Cat Food = For Cats. Can't stress this enough people.
State of Origin = Stepping stone to Australian jersey
Sonny Bill Williams = New Zealand

Stick to the Kiwis, Sonny.


750 words.

 

[Willow]

Willow | Bluebags

When is a sport not a sport?

Is chess a sport? The critics say it’s a pastime. But I’m going into bat for chess and will show how it is indeed, a ‘sport’.

When Bobby Fischer was smashing up Boris Spassky in front of a world wide audience in 1972, it was a true contest perfectly tuned to the Cold War years with the USA and Russia fighting for the intellectual honour of their respective nations. I remember it well and how this ‘pastime’ of chess took over headlines that were normally reserved for a Cricket Test Match or a Rugby League Grand Final.

The ‘Chessmaniac’ website reckoned 'Bobby Fischer will always remain one of the games biggest stars' – a statement said with the same gusto normally given to the sporting elite. Fischer has even disgraced himself, after being banned from returning to the US due to an outstanding arrest warrant from the Treasury. Surely this alone elevates the man into sport stardom.

Let's look at our own Forum Sevens competition. Is it just a writer's club consisting of rugby league wannabes, or is it a true sporting competition? The Forum Sevens has its own teams, club records, player records, a competition ladder and a premiership title. We even have injuries, if you count the occasional bout of RSI and internet meltdown that always seems to happen just before full time.

Forummers try and lift for the big game, and try to go up yet another level during the finals. I am absolutely certain that every grand finalist gives their all while contesting the F7s premiership decider. To coin the phrase, they 'had nothing left in the tank' was true for both teams; and at the end of a season, that's all a coach or captain can ask of the players, regardless of the game that it is being played. For all intents and purposes, this 'pastime' has all the same competitive attributes of any sport.

If competitions such as chess and the Forum Sevens are not considered a sport, then why not? Is it because there is no body contact? A rugby league supporter friend once told me that horse racing is not a sport. I pointed out that it is called 'the sport of kings', but my friend was not convinced.

“Its just a race. Not a contact sport.” he said.

“No tackling, no ball skills... just a race.”

OK, my friend obviously thinks that you need to have two teams with a football smashing into each other before it can be called a sport.

“What about cricket?” I asked.

“Well yes, that's a sport. It is cricket after all.”

“What about Netball?”

He shrugged a little. The football started on the TV at that point, and it was my shout, so I never got the answer. But I was beginning to think my friend only considered games that he liked to be sport... and everything else was for pansies. That being the case, it all gets very subjective. To be a sport or to not be a sport clearly comes down to opinion.

The dictionary defines sport as: 'an athletic activity requiring skill or physical prowess and often of a competitive nature...' and, 'diversion; recreation; pleasant pastime.'

The same dictionary defines pastime as: 'something that serves to make time pass agreeably; a pleasant means of amusement, recreation, or sport...'

At the end of the day, there doesn't seem to be a great deal of difference between the two.

My friend, no doubt, would not entertain the notion that something like chess is a sporting competition. I don't agree. If it is a competition, then it is a sport by definition. Of course I do draw the line at things such as stamp collecting and train spotting; but I ask the question, does it even matter? Why is it that we even need to define sport and pastime in a hierarchical manner?

These are activities which entertain, and are there to be enjoyed by both participant and observer. They are what we do as part of our condition to share experiences and recollections. This is true of anything we may take part in, be it rugby league or chess.

*702 words*

 

[Willow]

 

[Big Mick]

Thank you linesman, thank you ball boys and girls, thank you to the 10 magnificent posters and all the best.

Thank you in advance to the referee Mr Colonel

 

[Willow]

Good stuff Mick and congrats to all forummers on the 5 v 5 effort.

Should be a cracker of a match.

 

[gorilla]

cheers guys and gals,
good start to the comp from both teams.

Has no-one seen those dammed ampules ?

 

[[furrycat]]

The brown ones?

 

[gorilla]

The brown ones?

They could be red ...