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They are such merkins
Footy was getting in the way of what I wanted to do’: Eels star explains decision to quit NRL
Shaun Lane knew he was done the moment he walked off the field.
For 18 months, Lane had been grappling with the dilemma of when to walk away from a footballing career that had been his lifelong dream. The Parramatta forward, who is working towards a masters degree in positive psychology, knew that the time was coming when he would be able to make a bigger contribution off the field than on it.
The seminal moment occurred in the most unlikely place. The Eels were belted 50-12 in Darwin in round six by a Canberra side that was as hot as the conditions at TIO Stadium.
By his own admission, Lane had a shocker – a personal and team performance that may have previously led to a period of despondency. While disappointed by the result, it gave him the clarity he had been seeking.
“I hated playing in Darwin every year because I’m a big bloke, it’s 100 per cent humidity and 30 degrees,” Lane said. “I knew that game was going to test my motivation and physical abilities. After that, I was like, ‘I’m done, I don’t think I’ve got it in me any more.’
“Although I didn’t enjoy playing in Darwin, I’m thankful for Darwin opening my eyes up and showing me: ‘There’s the door.’
“Although I played bad and the team was beaten by a fair margin, I wasn’t really upset. I was kind of understanding this was the end for me, I knew that it was going to be the right thing for me and the club. It wasn’t a bad moment, it was like, ‘OK, this is where we are at.’”
It was an undignified way to sign off on a fine career. That loss to the Raiders was Lane’s 186th and last NRL appearance across four clubs, the Bulldogs, Warriors, Sea Eagles and Eels. In his pomp, during Parramatta’s run to the 2022 grand final, he and Dylan Brown were such a formidable left-edge combination that there were calls for the back-rower to be called up for NSW and Australian duty.
While that honour ultimately eluded him, Lane hangs up his boots satisfied with what he has achieved.
“I’m pretty happy with how it all worked out,” said Lane, who has retired despite being contracted until the end of 2026. “As a kid you dream of just being able to play one game in the NRL, and I managed almost 200.
“I’ve definitely no complaints there. I’ve got plenty of good memories I can carry for all my life.”
Some footballers struggle to make the transition into life after football. Lane has been preparing for that moment for years. Already armed with a bachelor of health sciences degree and a graduate diploma in psychology, he and brother Brett have just opened Pro Era Performance, a firm that focuses on psychological and physical wellbeing for athletes. The 30-year-old also remains involved with the Eels, mentoring the elite pathways and NRLW athletes in the areas of mental skills and wellness.
With all that to look forward to, it was a struggle for Lane to remain hungry during the final stages of his footballing career.
“In terms of losing motivation, I felt football was getting in the way of me doing other things in my life that I actually enjoyed more,” he said.
“I wouldn’t say I was depressed or anything like that, but there are times when things happen in your career when you are down, you realise you have these unhelpful thought patterns …
“As with most people who decide to walk away from the game, they all confirm it’s the same thing; you’re completely run down, you lose motivation to want to perform every week.
“Your body doesn’t recover in time for games every week any more. You roll up to game day and you’re still sore from the previous week and think, ‘How am I going to get through this?’
“Then you see your performances start dropping off. The expectations you put on yourself and hunger to succeed starts working against you.
“Suddenly it becomes deep frustration and a source of anxiety. You know you can’t live up to that any more because physically you’re just not up to it.”
In a bid to assist others, Lane is open about his own mental health struggles. Last year he launched a documentary, Out of My Lane. In it, Lane spoke about the moment he overheard his father Jeff, who suffered from a major depressive order for most of his life, talking on the phone about wanting to end his own life.
“If you look at the statistics around depression, it’s one in four people, and less for men, who have experienced an actual bout of depression in their life,” he said.
“It’s really serious stuff. The fact that I’m opening up and talking about it, as someone who is a role model and professional athlete that young men in particular look up to, hopefully I’m giving them validation that what they’ve gone through is ok and a safe thing to talk about.
“They won’t be scrutinised for opening up about their own challenges. That’s the first step in reaching out and getting some help to get on top of the things you need to.
“And for people not going through things, it’s a common thing that other people are going through. If you’re out there ragging off 10 different blokes a week, one of them is probably going through something difficult in their life at that time. It’s not a hard thing to be kind to someone.”
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‘Footy was getting in the way of what I wanted to do’: Eels star explains decision to quit NRL
The realisation that he could contribute more off the field than on it came to Shaun Lane in the most unexpected time and place.www.smh.com.au
Eels forward Shaun Lane announces NRL retirement with year remaining on his contract
Shaun Lane has revealed the game that convinced him to draw the curtain on his NRL career, opening up on losing the love for playing rugby league, plus his new role at Parramatta after retirement.
Shaun Lane walked off the field in Darwin four months ago and knew it was time. The Eels had just been flogged by Canberra but it wasn’t the result that convinced Lane to draw the curtain on a career spanning more than a decade across four different clubs.
It was the way he felt afterwards. The aches and pains were lasting longer. The enjoyment wasn’t the same. The club was in transition under new coach Jason Ryles and Lane didn’t necessarily feel like he was part of the future even though he had 12 months remaining on his contract.
“Pretty much immediately after my last game I would say was when it was decided pretty much at that point,” Lane said.
“We played in Darwin against Canberra and they just took it to us - beat us by about 40 points. I played pretty average.
“I didn’t play well at all in pretty much all of my appearances this year. I kind of just wasn’t enjoying playing footy any more to be honest for 18 months.
“I hadn’t really been enjoying footy much. It is not a decision you make lightly because once it is done, you can’t come back.
“I was constantly battling myself and battling my thoughts, and trying to hang in there as much as you can because at some points in my your career you have some downs and ….. you might come out the other side playing better.
“I guess after a continual period of it and feeling like my body wasn’t improving, my recovery time was just lengthening more and more …. I wasn’t motivated and the performance starts to teeter a little bit after that slowly.
“It all kind of eventually caught up to me this year. I felt like it as a no brainer decision for me considering I have plenty of other things outside of footy going on and plenty of other things I am looking forward to in my life.”
HELPING OTHERS
Lane has always been a deep thinker with one eye planted firmly on the future. While playing, he completed a Bachelor of Health Science and is currently working on a Masters in Positive Psychology.
He has been one of the NRL’s most proactive players in the mental health space - two years ago he spent his offseason criss-crossing the globe speaking to professional athletes and experts about the highs and lows of their profession.
He will now put those skills to good use - in retirement, Lane has taken a role with the Eels working with their elite pathways and NRLW programs on mental skills and wellness.
If Lane has his way, the impact he makes off the field will dwarf what he has done on it.
“I think I am on really good terms to be honest,” he said.
“I can understand some guys when they walk away and it is a life-changing decision and earth-shattering moment in their life.
“I always kind of bring it back to the fact that I have built such a rewarding life for myself off the field.
“I have in engaged in plenty of other activities and studies, and have so many other things I value that I am looking forward to doing off the field, that it hasn’t felt like that greater decision for me.
“I just feel like I am having a change of career. As a kid, it was something I dreamt of right. So it was a big decision but at the end of the day that was a young kid’s dream to play NRL and it’s not like I was making an emotional decision after a few bad games or something like that.
“It was a grown up, adult decision and it was right for grown-up Shaun morning forward.”
THE EELS
Lane only played a handful of games in the NRL under Jason Ryles but he insists the club is heading in the right direction.
Ryles has made sweeping changes and Lane is the first to concede that big boppers like him have become more expendable.
“I think there has been a lot of positive change I would describe it as,” Lane said.
“At the end of the day, the footy club’s job is to try to appease the fans because they are the most important stakeholders. You have to be trying to do that by generating an environment of success and sometimes that means having to move on old blokes like myself.
“The club took their time in trying to understand the coaches that were out there to be able to develop a plan around how each of them would go about achieving that with Parramatta.
“They loved what they heard from Rylesy. I think he has done what he said he would to a tee. It wasn’t going to be easy for him.
“There was always going to be a lot of change particularly in the style of football that he brought in and wanted to play.
“That’s where you have seen the bigger bodies like myself haven’t adapted as well.”
THE FUTURE
As well as his job with Parramatta, Lane has started a business with South Sydney star Alex Johnston focused on high performance coaching and mentoring for young athletes.
“I think we all play a role in contributing to something bigger than ourselves in society,” Lane said.
“While playing a role in a football team and trying to contribute to success does have a role in the well being and happiness of people who support that club, I feel like there’s plenty of other things that occur out there on a much larger scale.”
He is, however, grateful for the opportunities that rugby league has given him.
“Towards the last part of my career the game was just associated with pain and frustration for me to be honest - and tiredness,” he said.
“I loved it so much when I was young. There were definitely plenty of challenges along the way that challenged my love for the game and made me think twice about things.”
“Look, I am very thankful for the opportunity I have had in my life to be a professional athlete and have these experiences that not many people are able to experience.”
There's a trend at our club of players realising far too early that there are more important things in life than footy. It's a good attitude for a fan, but the f**king worst for a player.This insipid thief makes me sick.
