Round 3 (2006) Rabbitohs vs Lions

[Pistol]

South Sydney Rabbitohs v Sydney Lions

Venue: Redfern Oval

Crowd: TBA. Referee: Mystique

• This is a game thread only, therefore only game-related posts can be made here. Any other posts may result in loss of points and is at the discretion of the referee.

• Home team captain will be allowed 3 reserves, visiting captain will be allowed 2 reserves.

• Captains must post their entire team (including reserves) before posting and only those players listed may play this round.

Rules of play: http://f7s.leagueunlimited.com/rules.asp

Full Time: WEDNESDAY 19 APRIL at 9:00PM (SYD TIME)

**The Referee Blows Game On!**

 

[Pistol]

The Souths side take the field for this clash

Pistol (c)
rabs
Franko
Olympic Park
paulquinn49

Bumble
lockyno1
Clevo

Good luck boys

 

[paulquinn49]

PQ for Souths

+++++++++

Power Plays

Using your advantage…to your advantage

Remember the days when getting 10 in the bin were as good as getting sent off? I do and it is time we got that advantage or impact back in to the modern game.

10 minutes today can have a negative affect on both teams, often the team with the advantage gets to plot over a penalty goal and that is where the advantage ends. Teams with the disadvantage often lift and either score or keep the opposition scoreless in that period.

The perfect example of this would be in round 17, 2005, Bulldogs vs. Melbourne, David Kidwell was sent to the bin for 10 in the 66th minute. During this period Bulldogs failed to score a point whereas Melbourne scored 2 converted tries, putting the game out of the reach of the Bulldogs.

Call it what you want, great defence, poor attack but there is no denying they wouldn’t have been in that position if a player hadn’t broken the rules. The game has changed and teams can better cope with the 10 minute “disadvantage”. The only people that suffer are the poor people sitting at home watching the game that realise their player just got 10 in the bin, therefore costing them points in the Virtual NRL game on the internet.

So I propose a change on how the 10 minutes is played out. Let’s face it, they only go to the bin when the attacking side has a chance of scoring. Giving a penalty normally results in a penalty goal or added pressure, which can lead to a try, even if it was played out as 13 on 13. How about we further the advantage for the attacking side, give the captain, or more likely the coach a chance at a power play.

A power play is when a team has a temporary numerical advantage over another side because one or more players are serving time in a penalty area, or for Rugby League, the sin bin.

Under my change, the captain or coach can waive the 10 minutes and use it at a later time. My David Kidwell example would not really be relevant as it was late in the game with little time to use it, but say the player was sent to the sin bin in the 24th minute. The coach could run a message out telling the captain that they would like to hold on to it and use it at a later time. The side then takes a shot at goal or plays on and scores a try, already improving their new advantage as they still have a 10 minute card to play with.

The game is now in the balance at the 62nd minute, the side has had trouble breaking the line and have failed to score after three repeat sets. The defending side are gaining confidence and look set to launch an attack, when all of a sudden out runs the trainer with the instructions from the coach “We want to use the 10 minutes now”. Play is called off after the remaining set and the player that broke the rules in the 24th minute is now sent on his way for 10. This would break the spirits of the other side, while now giving your side the numerical advantage.

Rules of the 10 minute advantage card

· Only the penalised player can be sent to the bin

· If the player is off the field at the time, either through replacement or injury the player that replaced him will now become the player sent to the bin

· There must be a break in play for the 10 minute card to be used

· Only the team captain can say whether they are using the card or not

· If the team chooses to activate the 10 minutes after a try is scored and the player involved is the goal kicker, they may continue the kick at goal then are to leave the field before the kick-off.

In today’s game 10 minutes doesn’t do much damage, when in reality and according to the rules of the game, the 10 minutes is meant to greatly affect the side of the instigator while giving the other side a huge advantage. It is time to bring some of the unpredictability back into league, some of the excitement and pressure. The kind that can only come from something you cannot control.

That is a true advantage

++++++

750 words

 

[Pistol]

Pistol takes the ball for Souths after a big hitup by paulquinn49....


The Summit Awaits

With hearts of steel, the contingent of teams embark upon a voyage of self discovery and personal glory as they all attempt to climb that mountain and plant their flag upon the summit. This is the true test of ultimate endurance and survival skills.

To start with a cliché, the longest journey begins with the smallest step. Each team must check their equipment, tick off all the essentials and most of all, make sure that they have the commitment of each other.

The tether lines have been attached. It’s now time to get under way. All rugged up, the Brisbane Broncos ready themselves for the bitter winds and excruciating cold that awaits them. The national press have been creating tornados full of doubt and writing an avalanche of statements that the team can not reach the top of the mountain. They are destined to be stranded somewhere between just above the centre and possibly finish below the cut off mark at the centre. But that only adds fuel to the fire of belief in each of the men waiting to claw, scratch and grind their way to the top.

With everything in place, the men set off on their most arduous of journeys. With a tough start to the climb, Brisbane had an encounter with the men from the north of the state. The result was a catastrophe of enormous proportions. Some last minute changes to the climbers and supplies left Brisbane running around like a bunch of decapitated chickens. Luckily though, the climb was just underway and they didn’t slip off the mountain to their season’s death.

A quick recovery was what was needed for the next attempt. Circling around the men where the Sharks from the Sutherland Shire. The Broncos were by no means full of confidence but (with yet another cliché); you learn more from a loss than you do with a win. Veterans like Shane Webcke and Petero Civoniceva undoubtedly are the glue that is holding the team together. Not wanting to carry the entire load, Darren Lockyer looked to younger blokes like Karmichael Hunt and Brett Seymour to help take up the slack. The man in the control centre, Wayne Bennett also stuck with the original plan. He didn’t move people around unnecessarily. Michael Ennis started where he was named, and stayed there. Coming from the back, Hunt used his skills to chip away at the Sharks. Seymour put himself forward to take the pressure off an overburdened Lockyer. The result wasn’t pretty but they managed to get themselves off terra firma and make that little bit of ground up the mountain.

Next came Parramatta. The winds were picking up, whilst the snow was cascading down the mountain. Parramatta had the big names and the expectations on them to dismantle a Brisbane side that was said to be on tired legs. But not only did they weather the storm, the clouds in the sky parted as Brisbane were able to build a lead as a team and together they looked as if they were the real deal. Despite the expectations against them, Brisbane took that extra step and moved that little bit further up the mountain. And as they always say, (yes. Another cliché) there is no “I” in TEAM. Together Everyone Achieves More.

No sterner test awaited the Broncos than the St George-Illawarra side. They had reached a small cave where they had to ascend the walls to get through to the next level of the climb. It wasn’t easy. Though missing several stars, the Dragons performed extremely well. Brisbane played well in a beaten side. Webcke ran the ball up with gusto, Lockyer created chances. Just wasn’t their day. So the cave walls would have to wait, the elements were too strong to allow an ascent.

The next two assignments didn’t present too much of a worry. The Rabbitohs didn’t present much of a challenge. Nor did the Roosters. The Broncos dispatched their attempted avalanche with disdain. This allowed the Brisbane contingent to ascend the walls of the cave without any great difficulty. The elements had cleared to allow them to do that.

Looking stronger, they climbed further to a better position. It is much better to be looking down rather than looking up.

The climb is not over. There will be further tests and endurances ahead. One thing is for sure, sunny skies lie at the top. One day, they will make it to plant their flag once again.

---------------------------------------------------

750 words including title

 

[olympic park]

MONEY WELL SPENT
olympic park for souths


The Australian national psyche is one of the oddest in the world. Where else would one cheer for the underdog, believe in a fair go for all, show restrained signs of tribalism, and cut down those who rise above the pack? This is something we are all very proud of, yet when we do the very opposite of this, not a word may be uttered; for who would dare go against the grain?

To say the Melbourne public has been harsh on the recent announcement of a new $150m multi-purpose rectangular stadium in the Olympic Park precinct is an understatement. Letters have been pouring in and editorials written condemning the government’s decision to spend this money on building another world-class, high-quality sporting facility. ‘This money should be spent improving hospitals and schools’ claim these authors, nitwits who choose not see the big picture. These comments are really quite hypocritical – especially from such people who claim they live in the ‘sporting capital of the world’!

The whole notion of sport in this city is a farce. For them, all sports are declared equal under the sun – so long as they are a clear second to their prized local game, Victorian (now Australian!) rules football. It covers the newspapers, the televisions, the radio airwaves – yet nowhere else in the world has this ridiculous sport bothered to become involved. The drummed-up support and a well-oiled media machine ensure that their sport is quite literally everywhere you look from March through to September each year, regardless of how nonsensical the game actually is.

We occasionally get other sporting events here too – you might have heard of the Commonwealth games which occurred in March. Apparently a big world-class event using every possible venue right across the city. It filled our televisions and newspapers for weeks right around the country and was supposed to bring huge economic and financial growth to the city. They spent hundreds of millions of dollars reconfiguring and upgrading the Melbourne Cricket Ground (which doubles up as the home of local football) for the games, only to rip it all up and bring it back to its former configuration. Costing around four times greater than building our new stadium, not so much as a word has been said.

The state coffers (filled by taxpayer dollars) pour millions of dollars each year into the continuation and support of this game to upgrade facilities and its promotion. Not to mention the enormous money, time and space wasted on formula-one racing each year. The city is turned upside-down and it becomes a nightmare to travel anywhere in the vicinity of Albert Park to get to work or leisure. And again, the entire track is constructed and then pulled back to pieces each and every year. But not a single word is uttered about the costs spent on this.

A twenty-five thousand seat, state-of-the-art stadium to promote games requiring a rectangular field has been desperately required for at least the last decade. Olympic Park is first and foremost a running track, and the facilities built (and for the most part untouched) in 1956 for the Melbourne Olympics belong to the antiquities. Generations of soccer, and more recently, rugby league fans have been forced to use the ground because there has been nothing else suitable – yet there has been no issue pumping what would now be billions of dollars upgrading and building new stadiums for ‘aussie rules’ matches.

To have two first-rate football teams (albeit of different codes) sharing a hopelessly inadequate facility is a blight on the game, and more importantly a blight on this so-called ‘city of sport’. A multi-purpose, rectangular stadium with adequate facilities for players and fans (not to mention regulation in-goal areas!) is a wonderful opportunity to show just what Melbourne has to offer. And of course, Melbourne, the sporting capital, would have also gained its rugby union Super-14 franchise had there been a proper stadium.

I am a Melbournian. I am also a league fan. I love my footy and would love to see it played in a proper stadium. Congratulations to those involved on making the right choice and upgrading our dilapidated, crumbling facilities and bringing them into the 21st century, and I (along with many others) will relish the opportunity to watch our sport played in a fitting stadium.

Regardless of comments made by narrow-sighted individuals, one might even say it was money well spent…


--
WORD COUNT: 748 words (including title)

 

[rabs]

rabs for Souths

Oh no, not you again

The following is not a tribute to a 1980’s Australian Crawl song but rather another look into one of Rugby Leagues most rehashed issues – the season ending playoffs system.
In the last 15, and especially in the last 5-6 years Rugby League has changed a lot. The game is a simple concept but in the chase for instant success what can be changed is being changed. The game is so fast now, and revolves around big hits and big plays more often. The players are sustaining more and more injuries and they are more often than not bad ones. Juniors are being signed up younger and younger, teams are having to spring clean their rosters as up and comers demand higher salaries and in season 2006 we are seeing absurd regulations being brought in that threaten to turn the game into tiddlywinks. Dear NRL, how about changing something that NEEDS to be changed – THE PLAYOFFS SYSTEM.
We as fans we are always complaining about the playoff system that currently exists in NRL. There are too many teams that play off in the finals, perceived failure is rewarded, and success is not. The establishment argues that more teams in the finals means more satisfied fans, more games and of course more money. The time is right for the playoffs system to evolve too!
I have two main beefs with the Macintyre system. One, the Minor Premiers are not given due credit for their performance over what is a gruelling 26 rounds. The Minor Premier should only have to win one of two matches in the playoffs to make the Grand Final. You cannot undervalue the achievement of becoming Minor Premiers, yet not many people can tell you who were Minor Premiers in any given year, so reward it accordingly. Second, there’s too many teams, 8 from 15, or 16 next year is too many and yes it rewards what can only be described as an ordinary season.
Looking into the crystal ball you can also see that with the competition getting closer outside the usual 3-4 heavyweights per season, that someone getting into the finals on the back of an average season could be in a position to take out a well deserved Minor Premier that gets hit by injury or suspension at the wrong time.
The top 8 has to go, but I cannot see them going top 5 or top 6 so why not go top 7? Lets inch forward and appease the NRL by only dropping one team from the playoffs whilst giving the Minor Premier a rails run to the Grand Final.

Here’s how the top 7 will work:

Week 1:
Minor Premier gets the week off
Game1: Team 2 plays Team 3
Game 2: Team 4 Plays Team 7
Game 3: Team 5 plays Team 6
Lowest placed loser is eliminated

Week 2:
Game 4: winner Game 1 plays the Minor Premier – winner advances directly to the Grand Final
Game 5: Loser game 1 plays advancing loser from week 1 Games 2 & 3
Game 6: winner Game 3 plays winner Game 2

Week 3:
Game 7:
Loser Game 4 plays highest placed winner of Games 5 & 6 – winner to Grand Final

Week 4:
Game 8:
Grand Final between winner Game 4 vs winner Game 7

This is a fairer system than what we have now, the Minor Premier gets two chances to win a game and they play in the Grand Final by winning just one game. Teams 2,3 and 4 get a guaranteed second bite and Team 5 is threatened with sudden death from the outset whilst teams 6 and 7 are on sudden death all the way.
The way the comp is going with a top 8 system it is only a matter of time until team 8 goes all the way. A team like Wests Tigers in season 2006 could easily qualify for the playoffs without their whiz kid Benji and if Marshall makes a comeback near the finals he would be fresh and more than capable of propelling them to title number 2. Meanwhile the poor old Minor Premier that trains hard, looks after their injuries and rotates their roster well, ends up going out the back door because they slaved their guts out for 26 weeks only to be rewarded with the Minor Premiership – big deal. Get your act together NRL and evolve the playoffs system now.

748 words by the counter

 

[choc_soldier]

Lions team...

parra_panther (c)
roosterboy60
Dilmah
Steel Dragon
redflutterby

jed
Bomber

 

[choc_soldier]

parra_panther, leading out the pack for the Lions in this encounter...


BATTLE ON THE WESTERN FRONT

The history of Parramatta and Penrith encounters may not have an overly celebrated heritage – but it is one of the few true local derbies left in rugby league.

It is a relationship that does not involve any form of lingering bitterness or incessant squabbling. But make no mistake - they are intense battles in their own right.

In fact, Penrith almost have a duty to owe their very existence to Parramatta. In 1966, they threw their support behind Penrith being elevated to the top league, as the warmer favourites Wentworthville were viewed as a potential threat.

In June 1967, the first encounter took place at Cumberland Oval, where the new boys were dealt a 25-2 lesson. Penrith would not have a chance to exact revenge until their fourth meeting in July 1968, where they squeezed out a 14-12 win at Penrith Park. Penrith would win the next 6 meetings, with the Eels not tasting victory again until their second meeting in 1971.

Statistically speaking, this purple patch for Penrith can not be under stated. In 74 matches between 1967 and 2006, Parramatta has won 47 matches, with Penrith only winning 26.

Throughout the 1970’s, as the two teams fortunes took contrastingly different paths, the statistics told the story – Penrith, treading water in the depths of the premiership cellar, seldom won between the high flying Parramatta, who were regular semi finalists. Between 1974 and 1984, Penrith did not win one match between their bigger brother - even though there was a 19-all draw at Penrith in 1981.

In 1976, Penrith thought that if you could not beat them, the next best thing was to just take one of their best players, with the signing of Test prop Bob O’Reilly – but he was to return to Parramatta in 1978. Over the years, a number of players have played for both clubs. Perhaps it is just pure co-incidence, or perhaps a love for life in the western suburbs of Sydney. The former perhaps holds more credence.

In 1985, the often innocuous local derby assumed a new stage – in the intense theatre of the semi finals. Penrith, appearing in their first ever finals match, was merely nothing more than a speed hump for the Eels, being creamed 38-6.

Into the 1990’s, the spoils seemed to be evenly shared. In what could now be deemed as nothing more than a tricky trivia question, Parramatta scored two premiership points by default in 1996, as Penrith forfeited their Round 1 match, in amongst the heat of the whole Superleague debacle.

As the 1990’s drew to a close and the new millennium was on the horizon, this was a time where Penrith-Parramatta battles were even – and also ferocious. One in particular was in August 1999, won by the Eels 17-16 at Parramatta Stadium, where a number of players were sin binned and the ill-feeling throughout the match was abundant.

A quirky sidenote (in retrospect, it can be called that), the two clubs were entertaining the idea of merging at the end of 1999, as rationalisation became the name of the game, and the Panthers were teetering on the brink of extinction. Luckily, Penrith survived the cut, and lived on for another day.

In 2000, they would again meet in the finals, and once again Parramatta ran out victors, 28-10. The next two seasons are painful from a Penrith point of view, being on the end of three quite heavy losses.

In the final round of 2003, at a sun drenched Penrith Stadium, the Panthers defeated the Eels 40-22 – the win secured a surprising minor premiership for Penrith, but also slammed shut any chance that the Eels had of scurrying through the back door of the finals series to snatch that final eighth spot.

Recent encounters, as close as they have been on the scoreboard, have involved one team being on the up and the other in decline. In 2004, Penrith won both times against a despondent Eels outfit. In 2005, they caught Penrith going down as they were on their way up, and won both encounters.

The recent match at Parramatta Stadium (won 44-18 by Penrith) showcased how the battle between the two Western Sydney clubs have evolved – fiery, but not spiteful.

Personally, they are the matches I look forward the most each year. And here’s hoping that there is a considerable future laying ahead for these matches, because there’s always something special about them.

------------------------------------

Word count: 749 [including title]

 

[Steel Dragon]

Steel Dragon strips the ball in a one-on-one tackle and puts the Lions on the attack, sprinting the 20 metres to the try-line. Will he make it? Lets find out...

DIE HARD TOO

The sun is setting on a glorious Canberra day. My mates and I are standing around the Mal Meninga lounge knocking back a few beers, trying to put off our inevitable separation, where we all disappear back to the beginning of another working week, not seeing each other until next weekend.

There are several others standing around waiting to meet the players after yet another Raiders loss. Others wait for the post match talk from coach Elliot and captain Schifcofske. Others are just wandering around, for reasons, probably no less valid than ours.

My mate points out Greg Alexander, who is standing around looking for someone, after his call of the game. Brandy leaves, then Laurie Daley emerges from behind a door. A young man, covered head to toe in Raiders paraphernalia bails Lozza up, and has him sign just about everything he is wearing.

Phil Graham emerges from a corridor and instantly another young man rushes over, pen in hand, all excited, despite the fact his team got thumped on the scoreboard. Chris Kahler saunters over to Graham and gives the kid a signature as well.

My mate gives me an elbow in the ribs and notions his head over to the autograph hunter,
“Have a go at that. Back in high school those blokes wouldn’t have given that kid the time of day, now they’re the only people that come to support ‘em.”
I looked again at the kid. He has some sort of mental handicap. I looked back to Daley, the other kid still has Loz bailed up and is now pulling stuff out of his Raiders backpack for him to sign; he is handicapped as well.

I ignore the conversation my mates are engaged in and scour the entire Meninga Lounge. There are quite a lot of people with some sort of affliction or another, all coated in that familiar sickly lime green colour – as the first guy was – head to toe. And they are all excited, parents and minders assuring them; the Raiders will be here soon. To those young people, who had long since discovered the truth about Santa, are still reliving that same anticipation, every week or so, after the game.

My mate didn’t mean Phil Graham, specifically, in his youth, taunted the ‘slower’ kids at school, but he did mention a few boys I used to play along side, who had made representative teams. They were the ones who would pick on the ‘nerdy’ kids, and if the mood so suited, the kids in ‘I.M.’

At our school, there was one boy in I.M. (Inter-Mediate class), Mitch, who is the biggest Manly fan I’ve met, would forever be wearing his Sea-Eagles cap and on non-uniform days, without fail, he’d have on a Sea-Eagles t-shirt or jersey. But because of his particular disability there’d always be big drool stains down the front of his chest.
I used to mess with him a bit, but in a friendly way,
“Hey Mitch, you reckon the Steelers are gonna win this week?”
“Who they playing,” Mitch would question with his slurred speech.
“The Eagles.”
“Noooooo!” He’d boom, his face alight with a big grin, “Cliffy is gonna beat ‘em.”

And he believed it, regardless of whom the Eagles were playing. Mitch unquestioningly thought the Eagles would win every game. And that his hero, Cliff Lyons, would be solely responsible for the teams’ victory.

The handicap bashing at school isn’t a one-off occurrence either. Several of my friends have reaffirmed the stereotypical ‘jocks,’ at their schools, which were the local footy heroes and how they’d pick on the ‘spastic’ kids.

It is a real shame that growing up, those young football stars can’t see that those who they pick on, are those who become their biggest and loyalist supporters. More one-eyed than the drunken louts on the hill, fans like Mitch, and those autograph hounds at the Raiders game, are continually optimistic through good times and bad.

Hopefully, players like the Raiders who struggle to attract crowds, really appreciate the part that the handicapped play in the support of their club. And, should they have been amongst those who taunted the handicapped at school, be deeply remorseful.

These guys are the true ‘die-hards.’ They’re the ones who turn up week after week to watch their team run around. And regardless of the result, will be there again next week. Never criticising, persistently cheering, often in incoherent babble, but constantly supporting their team.


(150 Words incl. Title)

 

[roosterboy60]

Roosterboy60 gets the ball and now has one to beat...

The Roosters Problems.

A lot has been made of the Roosters problems in the past five days or so and I’m sure some of you are sick of hearing about it, hopefully in this case the referee doesn’t mind.

Different fans of our club have had differing opinions, as you would expect. Some have said they don’t want Brett Finch at the Roosters after his efforts last year and want Jamie Soward in the side.

Some are sick of the constant attacking of Finch and are big fans of him. The Roosters fans at the moment are split in this issue and it’s one I’ve been deciding on for a long time.

We have seen in recent days the criticism of Roosters coach Ricky Stuart for playing both Brett Finch and Jamie Soward in the same line-up and also there has been talk about Braith Anasta. I’m hesitant to lay any blame on Anasta as I think he is still fitting in and is also carrying an injury.

Yesterday Ricky Stuart decided to drop Jamie Soward from the first grade team to play the Dragons next Tuesday in the traditional ANZAC Day game. Now while I think it’s good that he’s decided to make a decision and bite the bullet, I think he may have made the wrong decision.

Firstly let’s look at Brett Finch who I have been a supporter of for his whole time at the Roosters up until late last year. Let me say that I don’t think any Roosters fan denies that Brett Finch tries his heart out on the field. For most of last year I could forgive him as he was basically on his own and was even willing to give him the first chance at Halfback this year.

When you look at Brett Finch in 2004, he had a great year winning Dally M Halfback of the year, playing for NSW in the State Of Origin and also playing in his second Grand Final. No one could fault him in 2004 as he was one of the Roosters best players.

I think some Roosters fans were expecting a bit to much of the team last year but I don’t think anyone of us expected to miss the Top 8. Brett Finch was expected to be able to lead the team around and that’s fair enough, being a halfback he should be able to do that but the coach didn’t give him much help when he kept swapping positions every time you looked at the team.

I was a supporter of Brett up until the Souths game late in the year when he couldn’t kick a field goal for his life but was prepared to give him a go for this year playing with Braith Anasta.

When he was picked at Hooker I was a bit surprised but was very happy to see Jamie Soward was going to play Halfback. As fans of the Roosters we have seen that this kid has talent and could be superstar of the future. Soward led the Roosters Jersey Flegg team to the premiership back in 2004 and I’m sure everyone will remember the field goal he kicked to win the match.
Everyone knew it was going to take time to for Jamie to settle in and develop combinations but I think we were willing to give him that time. Over the first month I thought we were pretty hot and cold. Only knowing how to play one half of Football but I thought as time went on we started to get better.

Braith Anasta started to slowly get more involved, Jamie Soward was starting to get some confidence up and Brett Finch was playing well at Hooker. The only one to really not play well was Craig Wing who was coming off the bench.

But then just as things were starting to combine Ricky Stuart decided to move Finch back to Halfback, which I thought, was a bad idea. To Brett’s credit he did have a very good game against the Sharks a couple of weeks ago but last weekend proved that I don’t think he has what it takes to win pressure matches.

Yesterday, Ricky decided to drop Jamie. I thought it was time to give Jamie a crack to see what he could do but Ricky has decided to stick with Finch. I don’t have anything against Finch but I don’t think he should be in first grade anymore, hopefully he will prove me wrong.

750 Words Including Title.

 

[redflutterby]

redflutterby for the Lions...

For all the new Footy Fans

Being a born again footy fan, I have been trying to learn – THE RULES. I’ve been striving to work out what a ‘hooker’ does, what’s a ‘knock on’ and why after the fifth tackle they kick the ball across the field and if it goes out of bounds that is something to cheer about (depending on what team you’re barracking for).

However when I researched what these words and terms mean I get an explanation that doesn’t make any sense or is barely comprehensible. So I have decided to create my own in laymen’s terms. Following are some novice (and an attempt to be humourous) explanations of player’s positions, point scoring, penalty kicks, and all the other spectacular events that occur out on the footy field.

PLAYERS

The position they play on the field relates back to the number they are wearing. Even though it may be hard to see amongst all the advertising, their number is usually on their backs and they get another player to tell them what they are before the game starts.

1. Full back
Stands at the back of the field and watches the game.

2. Right wing
Stands at the side of the field and watchers the game. Also can run very fast and usually in a straight line.

3. Right centre
Stands on the field and knocks the other team’s players over when required. Built like a brick poo house.

4. Left centre
Stands next to the right centre but on the other side. Built like the side of a bus.

5. Left wing
Same as the right wing but stands on the other side. Chats a lot to the cheerleaders and normally the ‘pretty boy’ of the team.

6. Five-eighth
Normally the best player on the field so spends most of the season off side due to injuries.

7. Half back
Tries to help everyone on the field by offering their services.

8. Prop forward
The he-mans on the field that do most of the work.

9. Hooker forward
Doesn’t do what the name suggests but defends the other players on his team and ‘hooks’ the ball (with a fishing line I don’t know).

10. Front row forward
Same as the props but don’t have such a catchy name.

11. Second row forward
Stands behind the first rowers but can usually run faster then them. Hence why they stand behind so the first rowers have a chance.

12. Second row forward
Same as above but now there are two.

13. Lock forward
The king of the forwards who do most of the smashing.

PLAYERS EQUIPMENT

Usually shorts, jersey, sock and boots which are besotted with advertising logos and symbols. The same team wears the same colours so the players don’t get confused and start passing the ball to players on the other team (even though this doesn’t always prevent them from doing this). Most players wear a mouth guard to make them look like idiots when they smile.

VARIOUS WORDS AND TERMS

Try
Awarded to the player when he gets the ball over his teams line. Can be done with any part of the body and most amusing when done with the face. Worth four points.

Kick at goal
Done right after a try is awarded where a player on the field kicks the ball through a large H. They usually miss. Worth two points.

Penalty kick
Same as kick at goal but usually done when a player on the other team is naughty so this happens about 86 times during a match.

Kick off
The ball is kicked to indicate the start of the game. Not a game where players see who can kick their legs the highest.

Knock on
Apparently not a good thing where a player touches the ball with any part of his body then catches it. Refs seem to be blind to these.

Forward pass
Players can only pass the ball backwards so a forward pass is a no go. Refs are blind to these too.

Tackle
Where players of one team hug the players of the other team resulting in a ‘stacks on’ occurrence.

Even though this has been a brief guide with many explanations missed I’m sure the game makes more sense to many now and that they aren’t just piss farting around out there on the field.

P.S. I still don’t know why the ball being kicked out of bounds is a good thing.

-----

Word count: 747 words

 

[Pistol]

Late change

Franko comes off to be replaced by the rampaging Clevo

 

[Clevo]

Clevo Checks with the linesperson for permission to enter the field....then realises he wearing his lucky bed socks instead of his Red and Green ones....

....................................



Playing Around

We were escorted directly to the VIP area. There was a DJ playing some tunes but we were the first team there as were some of the players girlfriends and wives. We ordered some beers from the bar which were free and some of my team mates were already mucking around because we were happy we won the game.

At around 9pm we were all gathered and we were greeted by the club management and their guests. We were told to make ourselves at home and my team were congratulated for our win and we were given vouchers for drinks and food. Our club management reminded us about the clubs code of conduct and reminded us that curfew was at 1am and we had to be at the hotel before then.

At 9:15 pm the VIP area was open to people. I didn’t know there was a $10 cover charge. But most of the people coming in were local girls. A few of them had boyfriends. The VIP area quickly filled up and by 10 it was going off.

I hardly sat down for nearly an hour as girls kept coming up to me asking if I would dance with them. I had no problem doing that because I was single at the time.

She was young and beautiful. I noticed her right away. Her black hair framing her smooth skinned face the flashing lights spinning shadows across her deep set eyes. She was tall and slim, unpretentious and when she smiled ever so sweetly I almost melted there and then into her arms.

I danced with about 15 different girls but one of them kept asking me and trying to cut in. I didn’t want to cause any trouble so I asked her if she wanted a drink and she said yes. I can’t remember her name but I think it was Rachel. I do remember her flirting with me and it was hard not to flirt back as I was a bit tipsy by this stage.

She had a way with words that felt intimidating and yet the way she leaned over to whisper in my ear aroused me. I wanted her here and now but the words of the manager echoed in my ears. I could imagine. I am allowed at least that.

We chatted for a while and she told me she is a big fan of the team and of me. I hear these things all the time so I didn’t make much of it. She said lets get some fresh air and she knew a quite spot where we could chat.

Her touch was gentle. Her rounded tight jeans beguiling me to follow. I found myself distracted by her back pockets and admired her physique. Her back exposed between knotted cloth.

She grabbed me by the hand and directed me to a door behind a curtain that went to a balcony. I remember just seeing the back of other buildings and the smell of McDonalds next door. It looked like no one ever really comes here. She was giggling and said this is a secret place. I had a glass of scotch in one hand trying not to spill it.

We talked a bit more and I remember answering lots of questions about training and about what my plans are for the future. I told here I was about to buy a house in Sydney near where I train.

I don’t know how it happened but we started kissing and she was pressing herself against me. It got a bit hot and we both had our hands going all over the place.

She looked seductively into my eyes. Mist forming from her panting breath. She wrapped one arm around me and with the other pulled my head closer to hers. Instincts took over. I held her tight against me.

Before I knew it we were in a car racing off to somewhere. I don’t know what time it was all I was thinking about was her and that this was crazy and I was confused. We stopped somewhere looking over a river and there were trees all round. I think we may have passed a sign for the National Park.

We had sex and afterwards she drove me back to the team hotel. It was 1:30am.

I fully accept responsibility and regret my actions.

My statement is true and correct as I remember them.

______________________________________________________

Word Count: 742 between the lines.

This story it totally fiction....

 

[TooheysNew]

Dilly wears his undies over his Lions football shorts...
*********************************************
School Rules

Compared to school football, Rugby League is a soft game. I’m not talking about the school games that are organized by teachers, where everyone plays by the rules and nobody gets hurt. I mean the lunchtime games where it’s basically just a bunch of guys smashing the crap out of each other, and loving every minute. Grass roots stuff.

I think the NRL could learn a lot by watching a few of these games and borrowing a few ideas. With all the interest kids show today in movies full of violence – what better way is there to encourage people to watch football than to turn it into an entertaining blood sport?

School football was a spectacle to behold. For starters, the field was a transformed basketball court, rough bitumen, with two metal basketball hoops on the sideline. Many a player got himself knocked out by running headfirst into these hoops.

The basketball court added an extra dimension to the game, in that the surface was unpredictable. Watching people get tackled onto the gravel, their skin basically sloughing off – it doesn’t get more entertaining than that! Surprisingly there were never many bad injuries: a few dislocated shoulders and elbows, and more loose skin than a bingo tournament. First aid? A bit of coke poured over the affected area, a quick brush on the grass to get the gravel out, and straight back onto the field.

It was always a fun time when a new student started at the school. The new kid would run onto the field, intimidated, daunted and fighting against their own fear. Pity nobody told them the rules. The first hit up would be aimed straight at them, and as soon as they’d head in for the tackle they’d find an elbow flying towards their heads. As they peeled themselves off the ground, bloody nosed, teary eyed, and appealing for a penalty, a hoot of laughter would be the only response.

The only problem was the constant vigilance by the teachers. Tackle football was banned at school, something about public liability. None of us cared. Each day we turned up to school with five or six different footballs in people’s school bags – books and pencil cases still at home on the unmade bed, no room for them to fit next to the smuggled ball. Then at lunchtime a group of ‘fat’ blokes with footballs stuffed up their shirts would waddle down the basketball court, and hide the footballs under an avalanche of jumpers, hats, shoes and smaller students.

The teachers would make continuous rounds past the game, attempting to catch someone mid-tackle so they could confiscate the ball. This went on until the principal’s office resembled a Steeden factory.

Of course, not all teachers were this way. We had some who would stand on the sideline (next to the basketball-pole-of-many-concussions), and cheer us on - screaming for blood. We didn’t let them down.

Now imagine what the NRL would be like if they incorporated a few schoolyard rules into the game. How amusing would it be to see Andrew Johns tackled, and then upended into a garbage bin and pushed down a hill? Or perhaps for the wingers to be tackled off the sideline into a group of girls sitting on the grass comparing whose legs are hairiest?

Not a fan of that idea? Well we could just make one change, and force players to play on bitumen – let’s ship them out into the stadium carpark and let them battle it out from there. I’d pay to see it.

Sure, not everyone will agree – I think the only likely fans of my proposal are the blokes I went to school with – well, the ones who still have working joints anyway. Them, and maybe the old blokes who sit on the hill with a beer in one hand and their angina pills in the other, and hurl abuse at the players. “You’re a big woman Ryles!” or “back in my day we used to play in bare feet in the snow while hungry dogs gnawed at our kneecaps!” They’ll be up for anything that brings back the sweet, sweet memories of the good old days.

At the least it would stop union fans talking up their game being the tougher of the two. We know they’re delusional – perhaps its time to prove it.

Mr. Gallop, I’m available for consultancy if need be.

You can contact me C/O Arthritics Anonymous.
*********************************************
749 Words

 

[antonius]

Ref Blows Fulltime.

 

[Pistol]

Great work by all
5 v 5

 

[choc_soldier]

Indeed - 5 v 5, and some great articles in there!

Best of luck to all involved.

 

[Mystique]

Souths

Paulquinn49 – Power Plays
An interesting suggestion on how to restore the impact of the ten minute sin bin. Nicely written and obviously a lot of thought has gone into the idea.
Score: 85

Pistol – The Summit Awaits
Brisbane’s climb up the table. Stirring stuff.
Score: 82

Olympic park – Money Well Spent
Good, focused article. Easy to read from start to finish and makes a good point.
Score: 88

Rabs – Oh no, not you again
Re-organising the play-offs to give the minor premiers the credit they deserve. Someone’s put a bit of thought into this one.
Score: 84

Clevo – Playing Around
Gasp! I really liked the way this was presented. Very dramatic.
Score: 86

Total: 425


Lions

Parra_panthers – Battle on the Western Front
Good solid article.
Score: 85

Steel Dragon – Die Hard Too
A couple of misplaced commas and spelling mistakes (loyalist is a noun and in this context should be ‘most loyal’) but the article itself is very thoughtful. I don’t think I’ve ever seen this subject tackled before in Forum 7s, so points for originality.
Score: 88

Redflutterby – For all the new Footy fans
This should probably be copied and passed out at events aimed at new league fans. Well, it made me laugh anyway.
Score: 81

Dilmah – School Rules
A suggestion that the game returns to the bitumen and basketball hoops of the schoolyard. Nicely written and amusing.
Score: 87

Roosterboy60
Good team article, lots of football knowledge and discussion of aspects of the game.
Score: 83

Score: 424

Souths 425 def Lions 424

Posters of the match: Steel Dragon and olympic park 88 each.

 

[Steel Dragon]

One Point! *Groan*
Who do you gotta blow around here to get a win!](*,)

Seriously though - well done Bunnies, tough, close game.
Thanx Mystique (was there just the one spelling mistake?)

And C'Mon Lions! We're not outta this - yet!:?

 

[Pistol]

Top effort Bunnies. First win for the year. Commiserations for the Lions.
Well done to Olympic Park for getting equal MOM. Thanks Mystique.

On a more serious note, I would like to dedicate this win to young Chloe, my cousins daughter, who I am happy to say is out of intensive care but still doing it tough. With a few more prayers, she will hopefully be out of the woods.