Ask LU - The relationship advice thread II

[IanG]

I don't play it. I'm a dinosaur when it comes to video games

 

[Eelementary]

I don't play it. I'm a dinosaur when it comes to video games

You'll love it, bro! You can do ANYTHING!

 

[IanG]

Jehovah!

 

[IanG]

Ian, roll with it bro You might not realise it, but they're not making fun of you - they genuinely like you and this is the game they play to show it.

Embrace it, and play along. I think I've said this before, but you are the celebrity on the forum bar none.

And yes, I am being serious.

I sharnt be doing that. Forgive me for not sharing you view. Also as for the moderators. How about practicing what you preach. To the one who deleted a post I made a while back and them getting on their high horse. Also I suggest to you not to consider a career in politics cause you'll end up like Kevin Baker.

 

[Drew-Sta]

Hey, no worries. Its totally your call mate I hope you haven't left us for good but I suspect you have.

 

[Misanthrope]

Not so much a request for advice as an update.

As those of you who matter know, I broke up with the bossy American girl two months ago. She's been touring Asia for two months and we'd planned to meet up and hang out while I was in Korea next week.

The original plan was to buddy up and travel around, but I asked her today if we could split up before I hit my old stomping grounds. I figured it wouldn't be fun for her to be the third wheel, and it wouldn't be fun for me having to split my attention between friends I haven't seen in two years and my ex-girlfriend.

She's decided not only that she does not wish to travel with me now, but that she also doesn't want to be friends.

Was it unreasonable of me to ask for two of my nine days to myself? I mean, she's my ex and a friend. I can't help but feel like she's being really unreasonable, not me.

 

[Drew-Sta]

I'd say its one of two things:

a) she held on hope of a reconnection, and this rains on that idea. She is now hurt, and doesn't want to see you;
b) she feels like she isn't a 'priority friend' as you made a plan and now want to bug out for other friends. This hurts her and she feels betrayed.

Consequently, she's made that decision. TBH, it may be an overreaction, but then again, you can't expect there to be no repercussions. It swings both ways.

I'd walk away and not worry. Unless you had intention to marry her, she is simply a story in your life. Perhaps a bit callous, but just my perspective.

 

[Martli]

Oh no, DA CHAMP has left us

Who will lead us now?!?

 

[Misanthrope]

I'd say its one of two things:

a) she held on hope of a reconnection, and this rains on that idea. She is now hurt, and doesn't want to see you;
b) she feels like she isn't a 'priority friend' as you made a plan and now want to bug out for other friends. This hurts her and she feels betrayed.

Consequently, she's made that decision. TBH, it may be an overreaction, but then again, you can't expect there to be no repercussions. It swings both ways.

I'd walk away and not worry. Unless you had intention to marry her, she is simply a story in your life. Perhaps a bit callous, but just my perspective.

I'm genuinely stunned she's so upset. I'm opting to spend seven of my nine days playing tour guide with her. I don't want to get back with her, but I thought she'd like a friend and I was happy to have some company.

This isn't the first time she's tried a 'Do what I say or lose me' ploy. She had me sever a year long friendship when we first started dating because the girl was 'being mean'.

 

[Martli]

Sounds like she's not worth the effort mate, unless you want extra drama in your life of course.

 

[Scott Gourley's Lovechild]

Gives you more opportunity to work an angle for nerdy Korean-American chick...

 

[adamkungl]

Drama queen. Be upfront with her, if she wants to be a bitch then f**k it. Her loss really.

 

[Joker's Wild]

Prime example why in most cases you cant be friends with exes

She sounds like a bit of a control freak who is used to getting her way by pulling the old "Im gonna go pout, you come and chase me" routine.

Kick that shit to the curb Bushy

 

[adamkungl]

Holding friendships to ransom is not cool.

 

[Dani]

Bitches be cray.

 

[Drew-Sta]

I'm genuinely stunned she's so upset. I'm opting to spend seven of my nine days playing tour guide with her. I don't want to get back with her, but I thought she'd like a friend and I was happy to have some company.

This isn't the first time she's tried a 'Do what I say or lose me' ploy. She had me sever a year long friendship when we first started dating because the girl was 'being mean'.

Yeah, friends don't give friends ultimatums like that. I'd say water off a ducks back and enjoy the extra you time you now have.

Its rough, I know, but sometimes 'friends' aren't really friends.

 

[Apey]

Give her a courtesy throwdown.

 

[Misanthrope]

Gives you more opportunity to work an angle for nerdy Korean-American chick...

I wish :lol: Unfortunately, her stupid boyfriend will still be an issue

Drama queen. Be upfront with her, if she wants to be a bitch then f**k it. Her loss really.

That's been my stance. I'm offering 75% of my time to hang out and play tour guide, and just don't want her drama ruining my chance to catch up with old friends from my Korea days.

Prime example why in most cases you cant be friends with exes

She sounds like a bit of a control freak who is used to getting her way by pulling the old "Im gonna go pout, you come and chase me" routine.

Kick that shit to the curb Bushy

It's f**ked. I'm still good friends with my first American ex. I'm heading to Mexico next year to do a big multi person 30th with her and our mutual friends. Why can't they all be mature and level headed?

Holding friendships to ransom is not cool.

I agree. I lost a friend once by caving in to her stupid demands. I'm not doing it again.

Give her a courtesy throwdown.

That's part of the reason I accepted her request to hang out in the first place.

 

[Dragon2010]

Just say "Okay, I'll spend the whole time with you" then ditch her when there's three days left to do your own shit. Nah, jokes that's mean.

 

[Eelementary]

Not so much a request for advice as an update.

As those of you who matter know, I broke up with the bossy American girl two months ago. She's been touring Asia for two months and we'd planned to meet up and hang out while I was in Korea next week.

The original plan was to buddy up and travel around, but I asked her today if we could split up before I hit my old stomping grounds. I figured it wouldn't be fun for her to be the third wheel, and it wouldn't be fun for me having to split my attention between friends I haven't seen in two years and my ex-girlfriend.

She's decided not only that she does not wish to travel with me now, but that she also doesn't want to be friends.

Was it unreasonable of me to ask for two of my nine days to myself? I mean, she's my ex and a friend. I can't help but feel like she's being really unreasonable, not me.

She's being unreasonable, but probably for deeper reasons.

I think she wants you to insert rod A into slot B.

Incidentally, one must be REALLY careful when typing "slot"...