St. Brett
Juniors
- Messages
- 1,312
At the recommendation of TiggaPlease I went and bought GTA: China Town Wars and after a short period of only 2 weeks I can successfully say that I beat the game.
But I had to use cheat codes to win.
Now, I said to TiggaPlease in a private message way back at the start of the game, "I bet Uncle Kenny G is the guy who killed your father."
Turns out I was spot on the money.
As soon as I meet him I said to myself, I've seen enough Young and Dangerous movies to know that the guy you're working for is always the back stabber.
I find it quite disturbing that this is what kids are playing today.
The game brochure tells you this is your new life. Learn how to sell drugs, maim twits, steal sh*t, become a hitman and on the side find your trusty old sword.
I think this game would make for a good movie.
It has charm and balls.
It's witty as well.
I mean, one guy wanted to wank me as a bribe not to kill him.
Another sheila wants you to excite her. When you accomplish this she goes to the hospital only to run into her again later down the track. You then have to drive her to her lawyer where she steps out and gets run over by a bus.
There's a level where you have to guide a dragon costume through suspicious camera clicking onlookers and this level will drive you bugsh*t.
You have to reach yellow check points and breath fire as well not to raise suspicion.
The guy in the blue suit is a f*cking madman. The level where you have to drive him through the streets while he uses a tommy gun is funny. He just wastes f*cks like some crazed twit.
In the end it turns out both him and the cross dressing fat guy were innocent all along.
So, the mission of shooting "blue suit" and "fat transvestite guy" weren't necessary.
They were innocent all along as Uncle Kenny G was the real main culprit.
You're killing innocent dudes there and the blue suit guy in the level where you have to kill him in the helicopter is a tad hard. You sort of have to hid behind the building and wait for his spray to pass you before locking on the bazooka.
The guy with the umbrella raising suspicion is annoying as well.
Riding motorcycles in this game is a joke as you crash too much.
The only good vehicles are Hellenbacks, those mini sports cars or Taxi's.
I end up driving an airport baggage buggy the the other day too.
There's a woman with a dagger on a poster which came with the game and she doesn't appear in the game once.
I saw her on a billboard near a telephone yesterday actually.
TiggaPlease, if you're reading this, you're right, GTA China Town Wars is the only good game on the DS Lite.
I bought Star Wars Battle Front yesterday and it's stiff.
Vietnam is crap.
Punch Fight and other game boy stuff is rubbish.
Castlevania Dawn of sorrow is sh*t.
And Indiana Jones: Staff of Kings is annoying as well indicated by my YouTube review.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FiPWLSGxJ3g
The DS lite tends to f*ck with your eyes too and I go to bed in the horrors.
The actual game play comes through my eyelids of a night and you see the mazes in your head lying in your brain of a night.
By the way, the end guy in China Town Wars is piss easy and can be beat with two shots of an automatic.
He practically rolls over.
But I had to use cheat codes to win.
![gta_chinatown_wars_boxart.jpg](http://www.gearfuse.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/gta_chinatown_wars_boxart.jpg)
Now, I said to TiggaPlease in a private message way back at the start of the game, "I bet Uncle Kenny G is the guy who killed your father."
Turns out I was spot on the money.
As soon as I meet him I said to myself, I've seen enough Young and Dangerous movies to know that the guy you're working for is always the back stabber.
I find it quite disturbing that this is what kids are playing today.
The game brochure tells you this is your new life. Learn how to sell drugs, maim twits, steal sh*t, become a hitman and on the side find your trusty old sword.
I think this game would make for a good movie.
It has charm and balls.
It's witty as well.
I mean, one guy wanted to wank me as a bribe not to kill him.
Another sheila wants you to excite her. When you accomplish this she goes to the hospital only to run into her again later down the track. You then have to drive her to her lawyer where she steps out and gets run over by a bus.
There's a level where you have to guide a dragon costume through suspicious camera clicking onlookers and this level will drive you bugsh*t.
You have to reach yellow check points and breath fire as well not to raise suspicion.
The guy in the blue suit is a f*cking madman. The level where you have to drive him through the streets while he uses a tommy gun is funny. He just wastes f*cks like some crazed twit.
In the end it turns out both him and the cross dressing fat guy were innocent all along.
So, the mission of shooting "blue suit" and "fat transvestite guy" weren't necessary.
They were innocent all along as Uncle Kenny G was the real main culprit.
You're killing innocent dudes there and the blue suit guy in the level where you have to kill him in the helicopter is a tad hard. You sort of have to hid behind the building and wait for his spray to pass you before locking on the bazooka.
The guy with the umbrella raising suspicion is annoying as well.
Riding motorcycles in this game is a joke as you crash too much.
The only good vehicles are Hellenbacks, those mini sports cars or Taxi's.
I end up driving an airport baggage buggy the the other day too.
There's a woman with a dagger on a poster which came with the game and she doesn't appear in the game once.
I saw her on a billboard near a telephone yesterday actually.
TiggaPlease, if you're reading this, you're right, GTA China Town Wars is the only good game on the DS Lite.
I bought Star Wars Battle Front yesterday and it's stiff.
Vietnam is crap.
Punch Fight and other game boy stuff is rubbish.
Castlevania Dawn of sorrow is sh*t.
And Indiana Jones: Staff of Kings is annoying as well indicated by my YouTube review.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FiPWLSGxJ3g
The DS lite tends to f*ck with your eyes too and I go to bed in the horrors.
The actual game play comes through my eyelids of a night and you see the mazes in your head lying in your brain of a night.
By the way, the end guy in China Town Wars is piss easy and can be beat with two shots of an automatic.
He practically rolls over.
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