REP MATCH - AUSTRALIA vs REST OF THE WORLD (2009)

[Pistol]

V

Willow v madunit


Australia v Rest of The World
​

This is a game thread only, therefore only game-related posts can be made here. Any other posts may result in loss of points and is at the discretion of the referee.
Captains must post their entire team (including reserves) before posting and only those players listed may play this round.
Only original articles, not used in previous games, will be marked by referees.

REP Match rules
5 posts per team.
Teams allowed 3 reserves each.
Total (including reserves): 8 players per team.
Rules of play: http://f7s.leagueunlimited.com/rules.php

Full Time: Wednesday 29th July at 9:00PM (SYD TIME)

Venue: The Front Row Stadium

REFEREE: The Colonel

*Blows time on*

Click here to access the F7s official word counter

 

[Willow]

The Roos have arrived.

AUSTRALIAN SQUAD vs REST OF THE WORLD (2009)

Australia Kangaroos

Willow (c) (Bluebags)
Non Terminator (vc) (Roosters)
Titanic (vc) (Titans)
Azkatro (Panthers)
miccle (Rabbitohs)

Interchange:
bartman (Eels)
broncos_warriors_storm (Panthers)
Timmah (Bluebags)

Don't forget your jerseys....

________________________________

 

[madunit]

Thes Rest Of The World Team have just stepped off the tarmac, Aussie bashing sticks in hand

madunit (c)
Jesbass (vc)
tits&tans
Amadean
Pistol

Bench
LeagueNut
Big Mick
byrne_rovelli_fan

 

[Non Terminator]

Non Terminator, in just his second match for Australia finds himself taking the first hit-up against an all-star World VIII side. Here we go.
750 words under the jersey

THE PAST IS TODAY

I love old media formats. I'm talking about cassettes, records and videos. I don't know why but they all excite me, perhaps because I never know what I might find on them.

Last year I decided to begin collecting vinyl records, instead of just buying CD's or downloading digital music. It eventually became an expensive hobby for me. During this period of my new found hobby, I borrowed an old 45rpm single record that had the Western Suburbs club song from thirty or so years ago. It was absolutely amazing to listen to. I still don't know why I gave it back. There probably are many other records like this around, I hope to find one from my beloved Roosters club.

More recently I decided to buy video tapes from second hand shops. The Salvation Army stores were selling them for a dollar each at the time. Good timing. The stands were mostly filled by Disney movies, but in a small area I found some old Winfield Cup videos.

As I only began to watch Rugby League in 1999, these ‘antiques’ gave me a greater appreciation of the history of the sport and the greats that have succeeded in it. I had heard stories from older fans about some of the legends that would arguably dominate the current crop of players, now I was finally able to witness their deeds myself. I loved every moment and cherish the memories which are now mine too.

Watching matches such as the 1989 and 1994 Canberra Raiders Grand Final victories fascinated me. Is there anything more riveting? The skills of Mal Meninga were fantastic to see, and I found myself cheering him on (even though it was twenty years ago, I knew the result and the very same man was crushing my dreams in the recent Origin series). These videos were so amazingly presented, they even had highlights of lower grade Grand Finals. Watching a teenage Adam Dykes and Mat Rogers destroy my beloved Roosters was also...somehow...inspirational. My favourite moment was seeing a runaway Ken Nagas destroy all comers. After having only witnessed the final years of his career, it was fantastic to see him as a speedy younger winger all those years ago.

I didn't limit my viewing pleasures to club Grand Finals. The story of an old fashioned Kangaroo Tour, followed by fierce State Of Origin action gave me an insight into those legends in full flight. The footage of players in this era was awe-inspiring. I was on the edge of my seat waiting for every play to unfold, just as I was during the current Origin series. Sure, I already knew what the result would eventually be, but it was still amazing to sit through it. A highlight was the Lewis-Geyer stoush which surprisingly seemed passionate than the recent Origin 3 fight, if that’s possible.

Every year, more and more people become converted to our sport. Replaying footage of the historical moments of our game gives them the chance to see modern day legends such as Brad Fittler, Andrew Johns and Gorden Tallis in their prime.

However, in this era of technology, with many thanks to open source websites such as YouTube and the various Channel Nine programs, it is so easy these days for even the newest of fans to witness any of the critical moments of the past ten to twenty years. Click on a button and you can witness Gorden Tallis slinging Brett Hodgson over the sideline by the jersey in an Origin match, or watch Hazem El Masri land his pressure-filled sideline conversion to defeat the Knights.

The major attraction for me was being able to watch the legends play their eighty minutes. It revealed to me how men like Meninga were able to lead their team under all sorts of pressure throughout a match and on to victory.

Most significantly, I was able to witness some of the lesser known players ply their trade. I’m sure if you watch any highlight package from the last three or so years, it'd be difficult to find something featuring a player like Alan Tongue. As good as he is right now, he could be destined to end up as one of those Forgotten Faces in ten or so years.

After witnessing this footage, I recommend that all new fans of Rugby League should witness these moments too. I guarantee that their perspective and appreciation of the history of our game will change forever.

 

[madunit]

madunit, in his 50th game in Forum 7's, his debut for Rest of The World, and representing the Philippines in honour of mrs unit, leads his worldly gladiators into battle.


The Mystery Man

There are a great many things that the 1983 Rugby League season is remembered for, but there is one incident which surprisingly has gone greatly unnoticed in the annals of the games history.

In 1983 the game made wholesale changes to extirpate issues surrounding scrums. The ‘hand-over’ rule on the sixth tackle was introduced to encourage kicking on the last play, thus reducing the number of scrums per game.

Halfbacks had to now begin rolling the ball into the scrum to ensure a fair contest and minimise the number of scrum penalties.

The try had also been increased in value from three points to four to further promote open attacking games.

All these rule changes saw to an end the blight that scrums had imparted on the game.

But this was not all.

The “Night Of The Long Knives” saw Newtown axed from the competition at seasons end, along with Western Suburbs. However, Wests managed to regain admission into the competition for 1984.

The biggest headline of all was to do with then NSWRL Chairman Kevin Humphreys and his resignation after a story on the ABC’s “Four Corners” program which implicated him with criminal activities and underworld figures.

But one story which was overshadowed by all these but still none the less intriguing and beguiling has gone relatively unnoticed.

It involved a New Zealand man who was desperate to play first grade rugby league in Australia.

Keith Arthur Wilkinson, a self-proclaimed rugby league player from Wellington.

Keith made a decision to fly to Australia with intent to play some trial games in hope that he would be offered a contract with a first grade team in Sydney. However upon his arrival in Australia he was apprehend by the constabulary after his criminal record revealed he had been previously convicted for robbery. He was issued an ultimatum; either he returns to New Zealand at his own expense, or he can stay in an Australian prison cell and then eventually be deported.

Understandably, Wilkinson flew back home, back to square one.

Dreams shattered?

Hopes dissipated?

No.

Wilkinson decided to go to the local cemetery, an odd decision at the time some would conclude. However, he had a plan.

He spent hours reading gravestones looking for a male who’s age was not too dissimilar to his. Finally he found his man, so to speak. He then successfully applied for a birth certificate of the deceased man, and upon obtaining it, he then got himself a new passport under the new identity and he was back in business!

Wilkinson again returned to Australia and this time passed through the security without a hitch. He was back on target of achieving his dream.

He is alleged to have played five games in Sydney. It hasn’t been confirmed as to whether he managed to play first grade, or whether he was even offered a contract, and because the name of the fake identity has never been revealed, no one can ascertain who he actually was in the country. One fact is for certain, he didn’t play first grade under his actual name.

Once he left the airport, he burnt the fake passport, believing he was now free and the rugby league world would be his oyster.

But with all great crimes, there’s always a great mistake. After all, a crime can only be considered such once the criminal has been caught.

Wilkinson had decided to separate from his wife. She was somewhat confused by the name on the separation certificate, so she provided a deed of who her actual husband was.

Nabbed!

Wilkinson was eventually found and deported back to New Zealand where he faced charges at Hastings District Court. Judge Tucker fined Wilkinson, a then whopping, $350. The Judge explained that such a large fine was imposed upon Wilkinson so as to deter him from attempting the same actions again.

The club he allegedly played for and the name he assumed while in Australia were not revealed at the hearing. His claims that he played for Wellington were quashed when club secretary Bernie Wood stated unabatedly that he had never heard of or seen Wilkinson in all his years with the club.

This comment alone raised massive doubts about whether Wilkinson managed to play at any level in Sydney at all.

But one thing is certain, we will never know.

728 words, including title

 

[madunit]

Rest Of The World Substitution:

LeagueNut - In
JesBass - Out

 

[Pistol]

Pistol makes an appearance for the ROTW team, continuing the great work of the team

-----------------------------------------------------------------------
​

Allo’ Allo’… What Do We Have Here?​

The music starts and we see a figure cleaning the counter at the café.

Rene Artois begins with his usual monologue depicting the previous insane schemes to get rid of the British Airmen and his hectic life in general. His life mainly consists of being an overweight middle aged Frenchman whose two stunningly gorgeous waitresses are madly in love with him and he’s trying to keep them secret from his wife.

Officer Crabtree walks in his iconic style.

“Gid Moaning. I was just pissing by when I noticed that the British bummers have been dripping their bums. I thonk they noticed the German farters on the groond.” Translated it means “Good Morning. I was just passing by when I noticed the British bombers have been dropping their bombs. I think they noticed the German fighters on the ground.”

Allo Allo was a classic farce, lampooning life in the resistance in the second World War. There were characters who were so outlandish such as Michelle Dubois of the French resistance with her catch phrase “Listen very carefully. I shall say this only once,” who would give our sides a few banana splits and cause our pants supply to skyrocket as the ones we are wearing would be drenched in urine. And who could forget the forger and master of horrible disguises who would lift his glasses and profess, “It is I…….. Leclerc.”

I still enjoy the guffaws that my body produces whenever that show graces my television screen. I keep the bucket handy just in case.

After watching recent events on and more specifically off the grassy paddock, I begin to realise that the game itself is turning into episodes of Allo’ Allo’.

The sensitive topic of group sex or sex in general especially seems to be dominating the news off the field. Open up a newspaper and it seems that there will be a headline in there of some sorts pertaining to an NRL player of some sorts.

If broken down to its basics, you have a headline of “man has sex with woman” or “men have sex with women”. Who really give’s a fire truck? That makes for nothing reading. That’s like reporting that I made a good cup of coffee this morning. But the fact that these men have NRL player attached to them, you’d swear blind by the reports that they were engaging in sodomy. It’s become a total farce.

We were bombarded with a press train of news, flooding the screens and papers like a monsoonal tidal wave, about the escapades of the Cronulla club during a trip to New Zealand in 2002. Circumstances surrounding said events are so ludicrous, it makes Rene Artois’ affairs with his three waitresses (don’t forget that Francesca Gonshaw who played Maria, left after season 3 to be replaced by Sue Hodge, who played Mimi Labonq), seem like nothing out of the ordinary. The only difference here is Matt Johns didn’t turn around to the 4 Corners reporter and yell “You stupid woman!” Nor did he follow it up with one of Rene’s trademark excuses like, “I was teaching her self defence”. The way this mess was conducted, Herr Otto Flick would have been proud. He’d be behind the scenes pulling the strings, controlling the outcome but the results turn out to be a total mess for all concerned except him.

Then there is another wonderful element in the game that rears its head, bobbing up more quickly than a whack a mole at a carnival. That element is alcohol.

This element seems to sweep through the community like a brush fire. Whether it be Brett Seymour’s exploits at Red Hill and the Sutherland shire, to the War and Peace novel that was the careers of Todd Carney and Craig Gower and to the recent events involving Brad Fittler and a certain man unable to keep his bowels closed, Nate Myles, it has been the same common denominator.

Like Leclerc, alcohol has disguised itself under many players in the past. Different faces, circumstances but when it really gets down to it, before those glasses are lifted above the nose, we all know who it is.

After a long night, a man after a few beers might want to relieve the pressure on his bladder. Willie Mason sure has and so has Sonny Bill. The only problem is it wasn’t Officer Crabtree “pissing by” when they were noticed.


-------------------------------

743 words


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_off-field_incidents_involving_rugby_league_players


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Allo_Allo

 

[miccle]

With a duck, a weave and a close brush with the Gold Coast AFL franchise, Miccle carts it for Australia.

Optimism can be costly

Inevitably, I see the glass as being half full. The sunrise puts to bed any negative issues from the previous day, and each morning is filled with hope and promise. I could be classified as an eternal optimist, but in reality I'm simply too laid back to get too bogged down in anything for any given length of time. But that is only my outlook 99.9 percent of the time. Yes, that's right, I'm here to confess.

"My name is Michael, and I have a chronic pessimistic gambling problem."

I share many common traits with every garden variety gambling addict which inhabit every TAB, every newsagency on Lotto day, and every betting ring at your local race track. Like many others, I cannot pinpoint a specific time when my problem started. Checking the odds every Wednesday morning when they are posted with various agencies is a regular habit, and the thrill of a possible collect has not decreased over time.

However, my problem is unique and specialised in a way which leaves me far removed from other similar afflictions. My chronic pessimistic gambling problem (CPGP) entails betting against my team, the Brisbane Broncos, on a fairly consistent basis. My CPGP, therefore, leaves me far removed from the other gambling addicts who have risked copious amounts of money which should have been left aside for other, more important, things in their life.

Much like the other addicts, though, is the complex system of justification that I use when explaining why I have stuck with my CPGP over all of this time. They're innovative and convincing, so I simply have to outline them here. You see, I do not drink or eat at Suncorp Stadium when attending matches. I spend a one-off fee every single season to attend the home games, and in-built into that cost is the price of the train ride to and from the game. Once that money is paid each December, I basically enjoy a full season of free football. Given the cost of a single drink hovers around the six-dollar mark, and the fact that you can barely cover a meal with a twenty, I'm well ahead of other patrons at the game.

Furthering my argument, have a quick think about how you feel walking back to the train station or your car and enduring the long trip home after your team has just lost a match. That feeling is horrific, and can be particularly painful when a large section of the crowd are opposition supporters who take the opportunity to gloat, sing, chant and generally rub your nose in the outcome. That, my friends, can be made easier when you know you can walk back into the TAB tomorrow and get a bit of cash for your suffering. A refund of the game's entrance fee, and sometimes a little more on top, if you will. Of course seeing your team lose as short-priced favourites against an absolute rabble of a team is heartbreaking, but the profit that comes from throwing a lobster on a $5 chance helps to ease the pain.

So there you have it. When the Broncos win, I might lose some cash, but it's nothing compared to what people spend on food, grog, a Big League, doubles and a raffle ticket at the game. When my boys go down, the fact that my wallet weighs a little more makes things easier to take.

Fans of the Broncos and other clubs alike have been disgusted when they hear about my CPGP and what it entails. They don't seem to care that it involves an outlay of only $20, and that it isn't even put in place for every single game throughout the course of the season. Many claim that it is a low act, that I should have more faith, and that I'm not a true fan. From some angles, I can see where they are coming from. I am the first to agree that Broncos fans have been blessed with incredible success over the past 20-odd years. If anyone should remain optimistic in rugby league circles, it's a Broncos supporter.

Maybe their points are all true. Maybe I should harden up, grow up, get over it and stop. I think I might well do just that.

Not just yet, though. Season 2009 is proving to be the most profitable year on record for this pessimistic Broncos fan.

*738 words*

 

[Willow]

Aussie Sub:

Azkatro is out.
Bartman is in.

 

[LeagueNut]

LeagueNut - Rest of the World

==================================================

Pogonophilia

In everyday life we all have things that make us stop and grab our attention. Sometimes it could be a cerebral thing deep within our subconscious that magnetically draws us to items of wonderment … or sometimes it could be because a Bugatti Type 57C Coupe drove past and you thought it looked cool. Either way, you’re entranced – drawn away from your current world for a few seconds until your faculties are returned when the distraction has passed.

Rugby League has its own item of wonderment that seems to attract a phenomenal amount of attention. It makes the commentators burst forth with superfluous praise, creates almost cult-like levels of following among the masses, and generates unprecedented levels of interest if it should ever end.

It’s a beard.

No really – a bloody beard.

Surely I’m missing something here. Most males past the age of puberty are able to grow a decent beard, so what is it about beards in Rugby League that generates this mystical aura?

The Warriors generated enormous publicity towards the back end of 2008 by giving up their razors – with mixed results. Some were able to produce thick, bushy growths within a matter of minutes, while others looked like they were cellotaping hair from various other parts of their bodies to their chins. Regardless, it became a team commitment that they saw through until the end of their season when they generated even more publicity by shaving for charity. That’s right – apparently people will pay money to see you remove your beard. In these times of recession that may well become a valuable income stream for some of us.

David “Wolfman” Williams has somehow begun to create a whole career off the back of his ample facial hair. It’s a hypothetical question, but would he still have been selected for the 2008 Australia World Cup team if he hadn’t become such a media darling? It was impossible to avoid the images of his hirsute visage as the Sea Eagles enjoyed their championship season – but wasn’t it the other winger who scored a Grand Final hat-trick? You’d think he would be the one to go on to more fame and fortune – but no, we’d rather worship some shaggy vagrant instead. And dying it pink, while no doubt for a worthwhile cause, just looked stupid. Whether his almost comical performances in the 2009 State of Origin series cause his star quality to fall is yet to be seen – but I reckon it would fall a hell of a lot faster if he had a shave.

So what is it about the humble beard that generates such excitement and media attention for our game? Would you, like me, be able to name all the first graders in your NRL team with beards – then struggle to remember how many of your family or friends are just as hairy?

Beards can mean different things to different people – some religious types praise them as a symbol of manhood and a nod to their creator, but others remain clean-shaven as a sign of their celibacy. Some workplaces will discourage them for the “unprofessional” image they portray to customers, but if you don’t actually face the customers then your boss probably won’t give a hoot. World War 1 soldiers were instructed to regularly shave because otherwise you couldn’t get a clean seal on a gas mask – maybe that’s why beards became almost mandatory for hippies in later years. Over the years beards have been encouraged, disallowed, protested against and even taxed.

None of this makes a difference in Rugby League though. A beard doesn’t offer any advantages or improve your performance, and a beard won’t help you catch the ball or kick goals. The growth of beards is all about testosterone stimulating your hair follicles, so maybe the point of the beard is to provide the illusion of masculinity. Is showing you’re able to grow a beard while your opponent struggles to put a couple of sideburns together enough to give you the mental edge?

The other mystery is why the media seem to go bananas for the unshaven ruffians of our game – and the only logical conclusion is that we’ve become so devoid of individuality that we’re drawn to anyone who shows us something different from the norm. Fair enough I guess – but surely they could do better than a simple unshaven chin.

==================================================

741 words between the === in the official counter.
Sources:
http://www.damninteresting.com/?p=444
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beard
And a Pogonophile is "one who loves beards" - http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/Pogonophile

 

[tits&tans]

tits&tans runs on the pitch ready to fight for the rest of the world. Woohoo!

749 words (OWC) between the *****

*******************************

All people are a single nation*

One is the domain of action, discipline, courage and heroes. The other is rugby league. Only kidding. The other is politics.

It’s been a troubling few years. Every other news story that flickers across our favourite website, or assails us from a magazine or blasts our ears from the radio, seems to spell doom and gloom:
violent protests in Iran, Islamist militants in Nigeria, soldiers and civilians dying in Afghanistan, riots in north west China and death all across Iraq.

Indeed, as bad as things may seem, there is always hope. Isn’t there? Would it be too clichéd or unrealistic to suggest that a possibly spark of hope lies in the magnificence of rugby league?

I could discuss the benefits of the spread of the game across the world, how it brings people together, fosters friendships and all the other tired phrases that are used ad infinitum by our sports tired pundits when discussing the future or the internationalization or the game.

Instead, I’d like to focus on a different area.

But first, a minor detour. How would you even connect league and politics?

One very surprisingly way, would be to mention that rugby league superpower – the United States. Wait a minute, I didn’t just write what I thought I wrote did I? Let’s rephrase that – non-rugby league superpower. For good or bad, American has been one of the major global influences of the last century. So pervasive has its political, military and, even more importantly, commercial reach been, that it even managed to cause one of the largest breeches of tradition in British sports. The name change, from Wigan to Wigan Warriors, may seem like a trivial stylistic alteration, but it wasn’t. It’s testament to the US’s ability to force (‘persuade’?) countries to accept its mantra of a consumer-based, television-oriented, commercial society. In addition, the American sports league structure, as a self-governing, capitalist venture, ‘helped’ established the English Super League.

One common strand that is interwoven amongst many of today’s top news stories is what Samuel Huntington called the Clash of Civilizations. Perhaps more accurate though is the clash between Islam and the West.

It is within this arena, that league can definitely help.

Indeed, in Brisbane there is already a healthy Muslim Rugby League competition where young men pray for safe sport and compete against local teams.

Racial and religious tensions in the UK, however, have been running high for a while, and reached a peak in 2005 with the 7/7 bombings. Amongst all of this darkness, there have been a number of shining examples, one of whom I would particularly like to salute today.

In a recently published biography, Ikram Butt describes his unusual and unique. A tale that started in Leeds and, among other things, involved training during Ramadan, a spell in prison, coping with racial prejudice, running a takeaway joint and the Qur’an.

Now, Ikram Butt may not be a household name, but any Rhino fan or anyone with any knowledge of UK rugby league should know that Butt was the first British Asian to represent England in rugby of either code, when he ran out on to the pitch against Wales in Cardiff in 1995.

Ikram Butt was brought up in Headingley and very quickly achieved his ambition when he followed his older brother into the professional ranks at Leeds. He since moved on to play for Featherstone, and during the first season of Super League, for Huddersfield and finally at Hunslet.


Since retirement, Butt has worked tirelessly with deprived communities and was a driving force in the establishment of the British Asian Rugby Association (BARA). He is now a regular visitor to the House of Commons, promotes religious and cultural understanding, pioneers development work in the UK, India and Pakistan and is one of the most influential Asian and Muslim role models in the country.

Only recently, in his role as BARA Director he helped write a page in the league history book when the first British Pakistan XIII stepped out against the GB U18 Community Lions. Coming up in August, the XIII take on the might of the British Police. On the field, of course! What a monumentally symbolic game!

He espouses the principles of tolerance, understanding and empathy all wrapped up in the excitement, popularity and dynamism of league.

Surely, it is this type of thinking that will lead us out of the racial and religious dark cloud that surrounds us today.

*******************

*The Qur'an

 

[Titanic]

Titanic for Australia (747 OWC)
---------------------------------------------------------------------------

​

ROTW in perspective

You would think that it mattered. You’d think that somebody really cared. The Rest of the World concept, something akin to taking a shower in a raincoat, as a rugby league spectacle is dead.

In modern times, the pressures of professionalism, club loyalty, State of Origin and the burn-out factor have reduced Australia’s participation in international fixtures to a tightly programmed schedule. Exposing billion dollar players to unnecessary risk just isn’t an option.

However, rugby league cries out for global recognition and there is an inherent requirement that the stronger nations assist those less developed. The media too plays an integral part by providing the motivation that induces ravenous fans to attend international games.

There was a time, before easy-access air travel, the internet and the saturation coverage of contemporary rugby league, when international fixtures were shrouded in mystery, featuring little known foreigners. The press would whip-up spectator interest with evocative headlines designed to fill every last seat.

“Pommie to bail-up ‘Roos
A convicted armed robber and English rugby league prop was today granted an early release from Brixton maximum security jail in time to join his team mates and hold a knife to the Aussies throat… ”

Antipodean sentiments would have risen as one to get behind our squeaky clean boys and to repel the northern thugs hell-bent on bringing antiquated colonial values to our pristine shores. Two hundred years ago we were the ‘transported’, now the payback.

“Le Coqs to enjoy our Aussie chicks
The touring French rugby league team have been saved by French retailing giant Carrefour after claiming that traditional Australian cuisine, including barbecued sausages, vegemite and meat pies, weren’t appetising. Carrefour’s Australian general manager Pierre Legarde stated that this sponsorship would include supplying the tourists with plump free-range chickens…”

The hackles of every true-blue ocker would have been raised by the pompous whining of the culinary-challenged Frogs. Their sentiments attracting legions of the affronted backyard barbie set to queue up for hours just to have the chance to rain abuse down on the garlic munchers.

“Kumul cannibals sharpen teeth
With some players allegedly only one generation removed from head-hunters and tribal warfare, the Papua New Guinea rugby league team is prepared to throw away the rule book in a ‘no holds barred’ effort to gain their first win over an Australian team this weekend… ”

Australian rugby league watchers would have flocked to see these quaint, exotic players from one of the world’s last frontiers ‘go round’. Always on a hiding to nothing, fuzzy wuzzy PNG have long been the darlings of the media who invoke WWII heroics any time the Kumuls line up.

“Blood debt for haka slight
It has been revealed that the New Zealand rugby league team has vowed to a man to extract fair retribution, plus interest in blood, as they regroup from last weekend’s heartbreaking one point loss to Australia. A team spokesperson has been credited with the threat after the First Test started in controversial fashion with the entire Australian team mimicking the Kiwi’s famous haka while laughing and pulling faces. The last ten minutes were marred by a titanic brawl…”

Nothing can rotate the turnstiles like the promise of an emotional clash, seeded with taunts and spiked by insults. ‘Across the ditch’ rivalry invariably reaches fever pitch when the media sensationally remind the paying public of previous acrimonious encounters.

The fervour surrounding any truly international representative fixture is driven by the expectations of the various combatants’ supporters. The challenge of repelling some arrogant invading team wishing to snatch bragging rights from right under our noses is fundamentally unacceptable. Whatever that country’s economic, social, historical or political ties are with our ‘home among the gum trees’ they will have no influence in lessening our rage at their arrogant presumption.

Be they the USA Tomahawks, the Japanese Sushi or the Argentinean Aardvarks, it doesn’t matter one iota. A Test match is the benchmark of transnational rugby league competition, where the purist can witness well prepared teams, displaying different personalities, different rule interpretations and different playing styles. New stars are unearthed, legends created and bitter rivalries rekindled.

So where does that leave such pointless promotional claptrap as yawnion’s Barbarians, round balls’ ‘friendlies’ and rugby league’s own Rest of the World matches?

ROTW: no concept of historic rivalry, no rallying of the tribe, no stirring of nationalistic pride nor passion… meaningless events, reminiscent of dining out at a five star restaurant and being served-up yesterday’s left-overs.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

[Willow]

Willow | Australia

The defence rests

Earlier this month I got an email from lawyer Chris Murphy. Apparently a couple of posts in the forums had gained his notice. It was an informal letter but it held a threat of legal action against LeagueUnlimited.

There was also a mobile phone number, so I rang it.

Murphy is often described as a high-profile celebrity lawyer. His record as a silk is akin to a gnarly-ear-bitten prop forward who goes in high and damns the consequences. He may be defending his line, but he always seems to be on the front foot when doing so.

Perhaps not surprisingly, Murphy is a rugby league supporter. His elite clientele include a number of rugby league players, and he has no shortage of opinion on the political machinations of the game.

Murphy answered the phone. We had a good chat and the threat of legal action passed very quickly. But the call didn't stop there.

On reflection, it was actually an engaging conversation - Murphy likes to talk, even more than I do. The banter reached an interesting juncture when, in an effort to drive home his point, he started quoting Winston Churchill!

Murphy then confessed that he thought LeagueUnlimited was owned by Rupert Murdoch. As soon as he found out we are an independent publication, he became very supportive, an almost socialist ideal seemed to skim the surface.

But Murphy is also a high-roller when it comes to making, and losing, a quid. In 2008, he lost a share portfolio worth more than $100 million in the collapse of stockbroker Opes Prime. He came out of it still owning a harbourside unit and Murphy's Lawyers Inc.

As a Member of the Bar, Murphy has defended some high-profile cases. These include 31 Bandido bikies following the Milperra massacre and entrepreneur John Singleton. Murphy has also been there for Jeff Fenech, Rod Stewart, the Rolling Stones as well as league players Hazem El Masri and Lance Thompson.

In 2005, Murphy's dislike for pushy law enforcement was well documented when The Sydney Morning Herald reported that 'pugnacious Sydney solicitor Chris Murphy' was arrested after an argument with police at Bondi Junction. The reasons were not reported, only to say it was a 'confrontation', which is not surprising. Murphy's black 4WD is still sporting the number plate 'VERBAL', and he once raced greyhounds with the names of 'Constable Plod' and 'Oink Oink'. It's the no fear factor that makes for a good yarn, and the confrontation could have been over anything.

Murphy was later released without charge.

More recently, Murphy got into a flame war with Crikey bloggers after an article's author penned a less than flattering version of the Opes Prime collapse.

At one point, Murphy typed out a post worthy of LeagueUnlimited's Fight Club:

"Well what can I say? A lie, an untruth, a malicious fabrication or are you just an idiot playing on mum’s computer while she cooks dinner?"

No quarter asked for, and none given. The stouch went on for several days.

During our conversation Murphy spoke of the Bulldogs Coffs Harbour rape allegations, and he confided that it was he who advised Hazem El Masri not to submit a DNA test. Murphy praised El Masri as a clean living bloke who should never have been subjected to scrutiny during events that took place in 2004.

Lawyer Adam Houda followed suit. Amidst a media frenzy which saw player's rights and basic principles placed in the front line, El Masri was cleared of any wrongdoing.

Murphy later represented former Dragons forward Lance Thompson. In trying to broker a better deal for the departing St George junior, Murphy went in with all guns blazing.

"This case is a hair's breath away from expensive litigation," Murphy told The Daily Telegraph.

"Let them bring the evidence and I'll tear them to shreds."

The matter was later settled behind closed doors, both sides agreeing the terms of the agreement would remain confidential.

Solicitor, name dropper, gambler, league supporter, ratbag to some and as complex as they come - Murphy has been called all these things and more in the 'Who's Who' of the Sydney landscape.

Nowadays, Murphy leads a relatively quiet life. I rang him today just to farm out one more anecdote but he asked if I could call him tomorrow, as he was distracted by a far more important event... he had to pick up his kids from school.

It appears that for the time being at least, the defence is resting.

| 750 words |

Ref:
The Australian
http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/story/0,,23539537-28737,00.html?
from=public_rss
SMH
http://www.smh.com.au/news/National/Murphys-law-police-hold-top-
lawyer/2005/06/10/1118347602373.html
Crikey
http://www.crikey.com.au/2008/04/11/what-will-happen-to-chris-murphy/
Pic
Daily Telegraph http://www.dailytelegraph.com.au/new...-1111115946949

 

[Amadean]

Amadean carries the Kumul contingent onto the field with great pride as the Rest of the World look on.


748 below the bar


---------------------------






Mike Hunt is going to Aussie Rules.




heh…..

Right, anyway.

….ehehe….

Whose? Mine? No, Karmichael’s.

I’d pity young Karmichael, but he’s far wealthier than I. Maybe outlandishly cruel parents can be a good thing? We probably should ask Richard Head and I. P. Freelie to confirm.

Still, I can’t sit around giggling at Mike Hunt all night, there’s important commentary about Mike Hunt’s move into AFL to make and consider. In all seriousness I believe Mike Hunt will be highly successful at Aussie Rules: I hope he make a huge impression on all the other kick-ball pussies. Heh.

I heard the news of of Karmichael’s switch on the radio this afternoon and was intrigued for three reasons, which I shall first enumerate and then discuss. Firstly, I found out that AFL is planning a Gold Coast team to attempt supporter theft from my favoured Titans. Secondly, I learnt that Karmichael may not only have been about the money. Thirdly, I learnt my beloved Broncos would be losing one of their (and everyone else’s) best.

Firstly: sooooo…. Aussie Rules at Surfer’s hey? Well, it probably isn’t a bad idea. It certainly spikes the guns of Super 22, or whatever number they’re up to now, who had been rumoured to be considering a second Queensland team. Then there’s the vastly overweight ratio of retirees to real people up there. Queensland has a low fraction of Australia’s population (which is far too boring to calculate here, but let’s just call it 22.78%, for giggles) but a high fraction of Australia’s retirees (I went there once and found the local supermarket {or Bruce’s Bonza Bewties as the sign said} contained 63 different flavours of Metamucil and not a single alcopop). It stands to reason that Queensland cannot be solely responsible for gray-scaling the palette to such a degree and so a fair number of the worryingly wrinkled must be from Aussie Rules states, where the men are men and have the tight shorts to prove it. I don’t imagine the Gold Coast Zimmers will steal many Titans fans, but their matinee performances should be very well attended indeed.

Secondly: Karmichael isn’t widely regarded as the best boot in League, because he isn’t. As any frequent Bronco-watcher would tell you, Mike Hunt would only make the top ten in-play kickers if every other back in the league was embarrassingly incapacitated. Moreover, I have it on good authority that AFL isn’t as simple as it looks, particularly in the catching departments. Well, not on good authority, but from some bloke called Adrian Barich who will be completely (and deservedly) unknown to every reader of this piece as the player who left the West Coast Eagles (Aussie Rules) to go play for the Western Reds (Super League). Barich didn’t set the world alight for the Reds. In fact, even after 45 top-flight games of Aussie Rules he was unable to crack 1st division for what was notable as being a shallowly talented team. He reckons (from his perspective of Olympian craptitude) that “"He's a great athlete, but when he comes over he'll have the worst kicking, the worst overhead marking of any AFL player, and he doesn't know how to handball.” Mike Hunt’s alleged inability to bounce a tennis ball around during recess notwithstanding, he will certainly have to improve upon (and completely learn) several serious skill sets.

For that, I have to respect Mike Hunt. Taking up a challenge like that is to blow both sets of lips to the wind in a big wet ego-raspberry to Aussie Rules players everywhere.

Thirdly. Well, the Broncos will have to find a new fullback. Worse still, given the looming disappearance of the Lockyer genius, they’ll have to go on the hunt for a new playmaker as well. Karmichael had apparently been groomed to take over the role, but will now be using (?) those hard-won skills elsewhere.

Actually, this is less of a concern than it sounds. Queensland have a history of developing brilliant playmakers and the Broncos especially so. Even if Queensland didn’t have such a history, they’d say they did and convince some young winger that he’d always wanted to have his ribs broken for the good of the team and train him into the role.

So, all in all, I say farewell to Mike Hunt. He may have looked a little funny, smelled fishy, and been a little soft in the warm-up, but I wish him all the best in his new career.


--------------------

Reference: http://www.watoday.com.au/sport/hunt-cant-make-it-in-the-afl-barich-20090729-e0sc.html?page=-1

 

[bartman]

Bartman is honoured to rise from the bench and wear his homeland F7s green and gold. Here's Johnny...

- - - - -

(Don't) Take the Pressure Down…

Take the pressure down
Cause I can feel it, it's rising like a storm

John Farnham famously belted out this chorus in the 1980s, back when he kind of still mattered. This was before he toured for “the last time” (several times over), took on the bloated appearance of a long-retired country league prop forward, and mounted another comeback following a dubious duet with Coldplay at this year’s Sound Relief concerts. Probably all seemed like a good idea at the time…

“Whispering Jack” was actually born a pom, and came to Australia with his family at age ten. The Farnham clan settled in Melbourne, and so we can assume that John is unlikely to have a great appetite or passion for the sport of rugby league. Certainly the reference to “rising like a storm” in the above chorus pre-dated the Melbourne rugby league team’s presence by at least ten years – although it might make for a handy post-try song at Olympic Park?

But John Farnham and his 1980s lyric* lead us nicely into examining the topic of pressure and modern day rugby league. Pressure felt by fans who invest their hard earned cash and their hard won loyalty in the weekly fortunes of their favourite club. Pressure felt by players and coaching staff during the 80 minutes each week that is their bread and butter, and requires their peak performance lest they don’t achieve a result or a new contract. And pressure felt by the ever increasing number of men in the middle and the video booth, as they try to get their decisions right to please the players, fans, and the circling media.

This recipe of pressure is exactly what makes our game of rugby league great and produces such memorable moments and experiences. Without pressure, would players be able to find those amazing skills that result in against the odds comeback victories as the clock counts down to zero? Without pressure, would teams be able to gallantly protect their leads against a rallying underdog in the dying moments of a match? And without the pressure, would many of us fans continue to turn up or tune in each week in the hope of that touch of paradise that only following our chosen team’s fluctuating fortunes can provide?

Pressure in rugby league is a recipe whose combination has remained largely unchanged over one hundred years, with only the serving sizes of the different ingredients being modified as the code moved through the past century. The match day experience has always stemmed from a basic interaction of players, fans and referees, but as the game has evolved into full-time professionalism we have witnessed changes.

The athleticism, nutrition and training regime of the players (and similarly the same qualities in the on-field referees) reflect the growing pressure that comes with needing to produce results on the field of play in return for a full-time. The number of officials in control of matches has increased as a result of the media pressure and scrutiny that technology now brings to the sport. Coaching staff and facilities have expanded to provide players with a more attractive professional environment, through the pressure of clubs needing to use more than just the size of a contract attract better recruits than their competitors.

Even the grounds that rugby league is played in have changed under pressure to provide such modern developments as bucket seats instead of wooden benches, and concrete grandstands instead of covered stands of the literal standing room only type. Where this might have reduced the capacity of some traditional grounds, the growing audience for rugby league on television – both on free-to-air stations and pay television, here and overseas – more than matches the lack of bums of seats.

Without pressure, the game of rugby league would never have evolved to successfully compete in the modern sporting marketplace. Whether the changes that have come with that are good or bad is a matter for opinion, but the necessity of those changes for the game we know and love to survive cannot be doubted.

So if John Farnham’s voice ever rings out over the Storm fans at Olympic Park telling them (and us) to “take the pressure down”, then tell Whispering Jack to get stuffed! Rugby league thrives on the pressure – and without pressure, this wonderful pastime shared by fans, players, coaches, referees and media alike just wouldn’t be the talk of the town.... Eh, Johnny?

- - - - -

748 words

Sources used: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John_Farnham,
http://www.clips.fm/john-farnham/release/whispering-jack

* Interesting fact: Pressure Down was not written by John Farnham, but by some guy called Harry Bogdanovs… nope, me neither.

A(n imaginary) prize for the first person to spot the three other John Farnham song titles within the body of the piece!

 

[Pistol]

Thar she blows

 

[Titanic]

and blows she does.

5v5 of the very best... some very good reads in there, thanks for the memories all and sundry.

 

[Willow]

Thank you time keeper.

Good luck to one and all.

 

[Non Terminator]

Fantastic reads all around. Particularly enjoyed Madunit's words, looking forward to playing your Panthers next round.

 

[madunit]

this is going to be an absolute bell ringer, hum dinger, ball tearer of a match!

May the best rest-of the-world team win lol