[SIZE=+1]The Ghost sh*t:
The kind where you feel sh*t come out, see sh*t on the toilet paper, but there's no sh*t in the bowl.
The Clean sh*t:
The kind where you feel sh*t come out, see sh*t in the bowl, but there's no sh*t on the toilet paper.
The Wet sh*t:
You wipe your butt fifty times and it still feels unwiped. So yo end up putting toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you don't ruin them with those dreadful skid marks.
The Wet Cheeks sh*t:
That's the kind that comes out of your butt so fast that your butt cheeks get splashed with the toilet water, or splash-back.
The Second Wave sh*t:
This sh*t happens when you think you've finished, your pants are up to your knees, and you suddenly realize you have to sh*t some more.
The Brain Haemorrahage-through-your-nose sh*t:
You have to strain so much to get it out that you turn purple and practically have a stroke.
The Lincoln Log:[/SIZE]
[SIZE=+1]The kind of sh*t that's so enormous you're afraid to flush it down without first breaking it up into little pieces with the toilet brush.
The Power Dump sh*t:
The kind that comes out so fast, you've barely got your pants down and you're done.
The Liquid Plumber sh*t:
This kind of sh*t is so big it plugs up the toilet and it overflows all over the floor. You should have followed the advice from the Lincoln Log sh*t.
The Spinal Tap sh*t:
The kind of sh*t that hurts so much coming out, you'd swear it's got to be coming out sideways.
The 'I-think-I'm-turning-into-a-bunny' sh*t:
When you drop lots of cute, little round ones that look like marbles and make tiny splishy sounds when they hit the water.
The 'What-the-hell-died-in-here' sh*t:
Also sometimes referred to as The Toxic Dump. Of course you don't warn anyone of the poisonous bathroom odor. Instead, you stand innocently near the door and enjoy the show as they run out gagging and gasping for air.
The 'I-just-know-there's-a-turd-still-dangling-there' sh*t:
Where you just sit there patiently and wait for the last cling-on to drop.
[/SIZE]
[SIZE=+1][/SIZE]
[SIZE=+1][/SIZE]
[SIZE=+1]there.. you happy now???
[/SIZE]
