I was amazed to find this one:
Diabetic Pet Moms
(sung to the tune of "If I were a Rich Man")
by Bobbi Brown Talisman
We're the Diabetic Pet Moms:
Gotta feed 'em and inject 'em
At twelve-hour intervals!
Gotta watch how much
They drink and pee;
Gotta watch the stuff they eat!
We're the Diabetic Pet Moms:
Our refrigerator shelves contain
All kinds of insulin!
Beef, beef/pork, pork,
And some human, too;
L, NPH, PZI, R, U.
We think back to the day
When they were diagnosed
Remember what a heavy blow it seemed
Wondering how much longer they'd be around?
We were a wreck! We freaked!
We felt alone and frightened;
Didn't see a way out of the jam:
Knowing that their lives were in our hands.
Now we're Diabetic Pet Moms:
Got syringes, Karo syrup, and
Glucometer Elites!
Keto-Diastix,
Prescription foods;
Internet support groups, too!
Yeah, we're Diabetic Pet Moms:
Know our hyper- from our hypo-;
Know what's normal;
Know what's not.
Even mastered Somogyi rebound-
And we never thought we'd get that down!
It's really quite amazing
What a major difference
Just a little insulin can make!
(Well, once you get the dose right, anyway.)
They climb the stairs again,
And jump onto the furniture;
They're puddle-free both night and day;
Will we get it right? You bet... one day!
So we're Diabetic Pet Moms:
And we wouldn't have it any other way.
(How weird that sounds!)
Yeah, life's a bit different then before,
But it's all been worth it,
That's for sure!
Diabetes hasn't been the end
For our feline and our canine friends!
...wtf