WATCH OUT MICK MALLOY - OZZIE'S COMING

[ozzie]

Well ladies and gentleman today I stood on the sacred green and fiddled with measures and bowls - played with Katie and had two balls this close !--! and passed my Lawn Bowls Umpires Certificate.

Now I can show Mick a thing or two - also while standing around the club after passing I won some nice little bikkies (no cheese) on the pokies. a lovely day was had by me - but it was longer than playing a ruddy game -

got to the club at approx 1115, examined in measuring and rules, had to umpire a pretend match where the participants were bluers from way back and called for the umpire every bowl..finished at 1700.

Tired little boy but happy...

 

[The Backpacker]

Ladies and Gentlemen, lock up your grannies, ozzies on the loose at your local.

Congrats mate. May all your summer weekends be filled with abuse as you screw up many calls. :lol:

 

[ozzie]

I got my little red (blue) book that i carry at all times - if someone queries a call - i just stand there and flip to the relevant law. Three hours later i make a decision...we finish the game at midnight. Or hope someone gets the willies and takes their balls and go home.

 

[Penelope Pittstop]

Ozzie you are drop dead gorgeous. 8)

 

[The Backpacker]

I got my little red (blue) book that i carry at all times - if someone queries a call - i just stand there and flip to the relevant law. Three hours later i make a decision...we finish the game at midnight. Or hope someone gets the willies and takes their balls and go home.

I'm laughing so hard at the visions in my head, I'm going to pass out. Lets just hope that no one wuries or queries a result. ;-)

You need to be quicker than that!

 

[ozzie]

I gotta umpire next weekend - they sure don't miss ya when you got a ticket...

 

[ozzie]

I got my little red (blue) book that i carry at all times - if someone queries a call - i just stand there and flip to the relevant law. Three hours later i make a decision...we finish the game at midnight. Or hope someone gets the willies and takes their balls and go home.

I'm laughing so hard at the visions in my head, I'm going to pass out. Lets just hope that no one wuries or queries a result. ;-)

You need to be quicker than that!

your just jealous of my typing ability I know...

 

[The Backpacker]

I gotta umpire next weekend - they sure don't miss ya when you got a ticket...

Gee you're feeling important aren't you mate. :lol:

Better keep away from those sheep then. :shock:

 

[ozzie]

hasve you seen Crackerjack yet - its a classic -

I have been bowling since I turned 40 and have turned into a handy bowler - no champion but have won club events etc.


Well in this movie I can relate to every character in the movie - most bwlers can.

The one I laughed so hard about was the episode where the girls put marajuana in the biscuits. Itw as in the fridge in a plastic bag and they thought it was seasoning.


When i was playing in Canberra Club i was playing the semi finals of the club major singles and I had to play a younger member than me who was renowned for his majuarana bisuits. He also had won the club singles the year before.

Well to cut a long story short - he turned up whacked to his eyebrows on this stuff and could hardly stand up - but being a good sport he continued playing the game. halfway through he looked at me and said "It is a mistake to put leaves in the biscuits but this time i stuffed up - i thought i'd put the seeds on top as well".

i dropped my bowls and nearly wet myself from laughing so much -as you know the seeds are the most strongest part of the drug...

We had to put him into the sack in the greenkeepers shed for the night because there was no way he could ride a motorbike - worst to come though.

The president of the ladies club had one the next day as they were left in the fridge and complained for two days about feeling strange and went to the doctor. I would have loved to have seen his face if he pinged on what had happenned..

 

[Penelope Pittstop]

I've seen it, very funny. I also saw American Pie 3 today. Very funny.

They based the movie on incidences that actually happened. I really enjoyed the movie.

 

[The Backpacker]

:lol: :lol: :lol:

I would've chucked him on the bike. He probably wouldn't have gotten over 15k's.

I will get my daughter to tell you a little story about the above. Put it this way, she can't even smell the stuff without visiting the porcelain now. :lol: