muzby looks down at his new dragons jersey, and moonwalks out onto the pitch, to the cheers (and jeers) of the crowd..
750 words, title to end..
Bad Boys
Early one Sunday morning, David Gallop is jogging around his local park when his mobile rings. To the strains of the Hoodoo Gurus belting out Thats my Team, Gallop takes his phone out, looks at it and thinks Oh crap, not Gould. What the hell does he want at this time of the morning?
Good morning Phillip.
Hey Davey, Ive just had the best idea!
Phillip, what have I told you about bothering me with your foolish thoughts, particularly at 6am?
I know, I know, count to 700 and then call you, but I did that. Ive been up since 5am counting! says an excited Gould.
Well, what is it? Im a busy man Phillip.
Davey, I had a brainwave. Im sick of the AFL raiding our ranks and trying to muscle in on our turf. We need to strike back said Gould, shouting with excitement.
Phillip, Ive told you before Im not keen to take on the AFL. Andrew Demetriou scares me, and you know how I hate conflict. It makes me anxious and I bite my lip.
Gould, not put off by Gallops nancy boy attitude, continued on There is a player from the AFL who is keen to come across and play Rugby League. We can strike back!
By this stage, Gallop stops jogging Alright Phillip. Youve got my attention. Who is it?
Fevola. Brendan Fevola Says Gould. Khoder Nasser tells me hes sick of the AFL and Im confident that we can sign him. In fact, Khoder has given me the heads up that he has brought him onto his books, so the job is half done.
I didnt know Fevola was with Nasser? Gallop replied.
Yep Davey, Khoder tells me he signed him up.
But Gus, can he play?
Yep, I went and watched him kick, pass and tackle. Hes a big boy, and I think hell fit straight into any team.
Okay Phillip, lets sort this out today. Come and see me in 2 hours. He then turns and runs back home.
Two hours later Gallop hears a knock at the door. He looks through the peep hole, recoils back and throws up. Do not be alarmed, dear reader, he isnt sick. Its just a standard response by anyone seeing Gus Goulds head through the convex lens of a peep hole.
Gallop opens the door and Gould steps over the mess Gallop has just made on the floor and the two head towards Gallops home office and pull out the telephone.
After seven rings, the phone answers and a voice says Youve got Khoder
Khoder! Screams Gould, as usual a decibel or three too loud for the occasion. Its Gus here, ringing about Fevola.
Ahh, Gus my friend, have you spoken to that prick Gallop yet about taking him onboard?
Hi Khoder, its David Gallop here.
Oh, Im sorry David. Gus, you should have said you had our wonderful friend Mr. Gallop with us.
Gallop blurts out Cut the crap Khoder, is it true youve got Fevola, ready to sign?
Yes, I have him keen to come to the NRL. He said hes happy to play anywhere coastal.
Gould jumps in quickly How about Bondi?
No, replied Nasser. He said something about bad blood in that area. Can you fit him in at Cronulla?
Possibly, Gallop replies I just hope hes cleaned up his act. Weve got enough bad boys at the moment.
Hes no longer the man he was in his AFL days, says Nasser, a smile in his voice Just fax me the contracts for him to sign. Ill meet you after the press conference and give them to you in person.
By the Monday morning, rumours are flying around the media about a big name signing for the NRL, as a conference is called at Star City.
Gallop & Gould are patting each other on the back and shaking hands with a smile, the media start taking photos of the two who took on the AFL and won. The curtains draw back, the photographers at the ready. From the shadows a figure steps forward, wearing a Cronulla Jersey. The media gasp, and fall silent.
At first, there is one chuckle, then another, then another. Within 10 seconds, the whole crowd is laughing.
You idiot Gould! shouts Gallop. Thats not Fevola, its bloody Willie Mason.
Mason grins, puts his arms up and gives the assembled crowd the double peace sign and yells Yeah Baby, Willies back in the NRL!