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No more sand in our faces.

Dave Q

Dave Q

Coach
Messages
11,065
The South Sydney Bear-it-hoes are pleased to announce that the following Knightmare players are due for a good thumping:

1. Mad dog

2. Cooper Vuna

3. Sporran McManus

4. Wes.

Injuries are also expected to key Knightmare players such as

a) Jesse Royal

b) Chris Houston

c) Chris Bailey

This game brought to you by:

Misery Therapy Cares,- the charity arm of the Misery Therapy School.

'No I dont have 2 bucks to spare ya dickhead"

Now get up there and take lads, help yourself.
 
Dave Q

Dave Q

Coach
Messages
11,065
We were workshopping at misery class this morning. This is what we came up with:

5 Mean tricks to play on the knights:

* Re-direct the ground announcers microphone wires to community radio. The "konfettistan" language show.

* Add tomato sauce to their gatorade before the match.

* Hire a dozen cheerleaders to run onto the feild topless at critical moments in the match waving blow-up donkeys.

* Make small pin-prick holes in the game balls so that they gradually deflate.

* Start rumour that Royal has signed for Souths.

Someone brought in an old Adelaide Rams jumper for show and tell. We were asked to name old Ram players but nobody could remember any.

Then we got back to our worlds greatest disaster readings.

During recess it started raining with some hail. We were greatly cheered by the sight of the hail pounding our vehicles as we were all looking forward to having our claims denied by our insurance companies.

If the cars are damaged enough, some of us may have to make it home via public transport in bad weather.

What an awesome way to end the day!

With a bit of luck the power might get cut off during Friday Night Football.

donkey2b.jpg

Let me at 'em.

photo: cracked.com
 
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Tin Man 4.24

Tin Man 4.24

Juniors
Messages
591
Unmitigated hate and spitefulness towards every other team in the comp when your own aren't playing so well. As a Parra fan I can empathise with your position.

In round 23 Souths play Manly. If you could arrange for that aggravating, water-bottle-carrying little git Geoff Toovey, to get trampled under foot bay a rampaging Roy Asotasi I would be forever grateful.

I would've requested one of the forwards from my own club to do this but I don't think any of them are up to it.
 
Dave Q

Dave Q

Coach
Messages
11,065
Tin Man 4.24 said:
Unmitigated hate and spitefulness towards every other team in the comp when your own aren't playing so well. As a Parra fan I can empathise with your position.

In round 23 Souths play Manly. If you could arrange for that aggravating, water-bottle-carrying little git Geoff Toovey, to get trampled under foot bay a rampaging Roy Asotasi I would be forever grateful.

I would've requested one of the forwards from my own club to do this but I don't think any of them are up to it.
Click to expand...

A friend arrives in this hour of darkness.

A touch of truthfulness in a world of fakery.

Thank you for your contribution.
 
Dave Q

Dave Q

Coach
Messages
11,065
Theres Tooves rushing up from fullback with his water bottle and into the defensive line barking out instructions, running angles.

That confuses the slow thinkers amongst the opposition players and of course, the video referee.

Well listen to this instruction wayward trainers: "Fug off"

Of course the eternal "ball boy" Toovs is not the only practictioner of this evil craft.

There should be a rule that if a trainer is caught on the feild and is caught offside, the opposition side can:

2.3.22 "Use such means as they fit, to block his transmission of instructions to the other side."

Alternatively, keep the trainers to 6 runs per game.

Good post krudster.
 
Raging Rabbit

Raging Rabbit

juniors
Messages
699
Tin Man 4.24 said:
Unmitigated hate and spitefulness towards every other team in the comp when your own aren't playing so well. As a Parra fan I can empathise with your position.

In round 23 Souths play Manly. If you could arrange for that aggravating, water-bottle-carrying little git Geoff Toovey, to get trampled under foot bay a rampaging Roy Asotasi I would be forever grateful.

I would've requested one of the forwards from my own club to do this but I don't think any of them are up to it.
Click to expand...

:lol:

Very nice Tin Man.

It is these sort of specific requests that we need during these harrowing times.

Come on all you cellar dwellers, compile a list.

SSFC is on a mission to maim, all within the rules of course.

Flogging Billy Slater would be near the top of my tree.
 
Tin Man 4.24

Tin Man 4.24

Juniors
Messages
591
Dave Q & RR,
despite our differences (we're obviously from different sides of the track team-wise) I think that we can rally together under the banner of misery.

Regardless of the fact that Parra won last night I give them no hope for this season. I love them dearly, but their tactics are dull and have been all season. I nodded off 4 times during the highlights alone. You'd be forgiven for thinking that I have narcolepsy, but sad to say the Parra team for 2008 are boring and the Cowboys even worse. That's okay so are the Sharks, they're just better at it. But I digress...

My point is, let us not ignore our teams short-comings, but revel in them. I say if you can't beat them, try and drag them down to your squalid level. Why should Billy Slater run the lap of honour on grand final day just because the Storm have grappled their way to another premiership? If he can be taken out before hand, then fine. Let him watch the action from the sideline wearing a sling or leg cast.

With this in mind I have began to compile the following misery list. A catalogue of people I'd like to see come to some sort of grief before the finals. Not permanent grief of course, just a 6-8 week injury. I might be a little spiteful, but I'm not a total monster (yet). In no particular order...

1) Geoff Toovey
2) Billy Slater
3) Paul Gallen (I'm a little torn here as he's the type of thug that we need.)
4) Steve Matai
5) Justin Hodges
 
Dave Q

Dave Q

Coach
Messages
11,065
Good idea, but I couldnt be bothered with a list RR.

Is not this thread about simply not bothering, couldnt be stuffed etc?

I saw the eels "uninspiring win" I was happy for the fans etc but I was more happy because it cements another side with the spoon instead of us.

Thats totally selfish and pathetic but so what.

If we dont make the 8 lets just not get the fugging spoon.

I like the NQ coach though, I feel for him and his side of no-hopers.

They suck so badly, they deserve to win.
 
Dave Q

Dave Q

Coach
Messages
11,065
I'm thinking that we could just do away with 5/8 alltogether. Make it redundant.

Just a gap where 5/8 should be and Sutto can throw a long ball out to Aso at inside centre.

Alternatively, Max can move to prop and Chris can throw a short one out to Dolph on the blindside.

We put a big man on some frightened winger.

The ensuing collision should see the opposition winger concussed for the remainder of the match.

You dont need to tread on a bloke's head. Thats for cats.
 
Dave Q

Dave Q

Coach
Messages
11,065
Rodgered up at Newcastle.

Bent over.

Owned.

Pawned.

68 missed tackles.

Gave up.

Humiliated.

Looks like a busy week coming up here at Misery Central.

At least those of us who started earlier...we have a full week under our belt.

Thats why we cant feel angry now.

All we feel is numb. A bit like the doggies.
 
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