muzby takes the first hit up for the
bluebags, thinking the extended full time whistle will only delay how long till he can crack open his post-match beer.
750 words, title to end.
It helps if youre a little nuts.
Will Chambers testicles were feeling sore & sorry for themselves. They were finding it hard to recover from Sam Burgess giving them a big squeeze.
Not only were Lefty and Righty finding any movement that Chambers made quite painful, they were finding it hard to show themselves in public and this was causing them trouble with other organs in the body.
Your nervousness is making me pump blood harder! yelled Chambers heart.
You guys wincing every time our master sits down makes us go cross-eyed! screamed the eyes.
Feeling like they were alienating themselves from other parts of the body, they spoke to Willy; who was their nearest & closest friend.
Willy, asked Lefty, Were struggling here mate. What can we do to get ourselves right again?
Willy, who was wise for his age as he'd been around, replied Well boys, I think you need to give Josh Grahams testicles a call. They were in a similar predicament a few years ago.
So Righty pulled out his t-Phone (a specific device designed for by Apple Inc. which is proof they have a product for
every need) and called up Josh Grahams testicles, who at that point were relaxing up on the Gold Coast.
Righty explained his situation to his new friends, and one of Grahams testicles replied Well, we were in exactly the same situation thanks to Paul Gallen. We were only able to get ourselves back on track after calling Gould.
Phil Gould? asked a puzzled Righty, Is that because his head looks like one of us?
No chuckled one of Grahams testicles, Call G.O.U.L.D. Group Of Un-Loved & Damaged. Its a support group for injured body parts. They were fantastic - they helped to get us right both physically and mentally.
So after the usual pleasantries exchanged between testicles, Lefty & Righty finished the call and then put in a call straight away to G.O.U.L.D. and arranged to attend the next meeting of injured body parts.
Rocking up to the meeting they sat down in a circle of chairs, nothing a number of other body parts had already arrived. Lefty struck up a conversation with a hip joint sitting next to him.
Hi there, whats your name? Lefty enquired.
Were Gareth Widdops hip replied the ball part of the joint. We found ourselves starting to drift apart earlier this year, we even separated at one point. But we came to G.O.U.L.D. and since then weve made an excellent recovery.
Thats fantastic replied an excited Lefty. Hey, whos that there?
The socket part of Gareth Widdops hip spoke up Ah, thats Steve Matais shoulder. Hes here every week, claiming to be sore & injured. But between you and me, I reckon theres nothing wrong with him and hes faking.
More parts started to enter the room and all bar one chair was filled.
Righty noticed it had a sign on it saying RESERVED - TERRY CAMPESE FAMILY.
Whats that all about? he asked Widdops hip.
Oh, we keep that spot each week for one of Terry Campeses body parts. It seems like each week theres one in here so we decided to keep a spot open for them. Apparently G.O.U.L.D. has had close to the whole body in here over time."
Righty looked over at who had taken the seat next to him & saw a rather sad and sorry ankle sitting there so decided to introduce himself.
Gday there, were Will Chambers testicles."
Hi guys, Im Jharal Yow Yehs ankle
Hi ankle replied Lefty & Righty in unison, Why did you come here?
Yow Yehs ankle replied I was feeling under a lot of stress there for a while. And one day I just snapped. I havent been the same since. But thanks to G.O.U.L.D. Im slowly recovering. This group is fantastic for that. Actually, you guys should meet Benji Marshalls shoulder, hes one of our success stories. Hey, Shoulders, come meet these two.
Marshalls shoulder strutted over confidently. Hi guys. Did you know I used to be injured all the time making tackles? But thanks to G.O.U.L.D. Ive found a solution to my problem. Ive convinced my host to switch over to Rugby Union. You dont need to be able to tackle to play that game.
Playing Union instead of League? said Righty, Youre nuts!
No, I think that's you guys. replied Marshalls shoulders.