Jono Russell
Bench
- Messages
- 4,860
thought it was time for another make us laugh thread but here i go with some funny thing that i have found.
Jokes
JOB INTERVIEW
3 men (a belgian, a german and a french) have an audition for a new job in
England. Just before the interview, someone tells them: "OK, you'll have to
formulate a sentence with the 3 words green, pink and yellow."
First, the Belgian says: "I wake up in the morning, I eat a yellow banana,
a green pepper and in the evening I watch the Pink Panther on TV."
Second, the German says: "I wake up in the morning, I see the yellow sun,
the green grass and I think to myself : I hope it will be a pink day."
And the French guys says: "I wake up in ze morningk, I hear ze phone :
'green.....green...green...' I pink up ze phone and I say, 'Yellow?'"
What Is Politics?
Son: Dad, I have to do a special report for school. Can I ask you a question?
Father: Sure, son. What's the question?
Son: What is politics?
Father: Well, let's take our home for example. I am the wage earner, so let's call me Tony Blair. Your mother is the administrator of money, so we'll call her Gordon Brown. We take care of your needs, so we'll call you the People. We'll call the maid the Working Class, and your baby brother we can call the Future. Do you understand, son?
Son: I'm not really sure, Dad. I'll have to think about it.
That night, awakened by his baby brother's crying, the boy went to see what was wrong. Discovering that the baby had seriously soiled his diaper, the boy went to his parents' room and found his mother sound asleep. He went to the maid's room where, peeking through the keyhole, he saw his father in bed with the maid. The boy's knocking went totally unheeded by his father and the maid, so the boy returned to his room and went back to sleep. The next morning he reported to his father.
Son: Dad, now I think I understand what politics is.
Father: Good, son! Can you explain it to me in your own words?
Son: Well, dad, while Tony Blair is screwing the Working Class, Gordon Brown is sound asleep, the People are being completely ignored and the Future is full of shit.
Jokes
JOB INTERVIEW
3 men (a belgian, a german and a french) have an audition for a new job in
England. Just before the interview, someone tells them: "OK, you'll have to
formulate a sentence with the 3 words green, pink and yellow."
First, the Belgian says: "I wake up in the morning, I eat a yellow banana,
a green pepper and in the evening I watch the Pink Panther on TV."
Second, the German says: "I wake up in the morning, I see the yellow sun,
the green grass and I think to myself : I hope it will be a pink day."
And the French guys says: "I wake up in ze morningk, I hear ze phone :
'green.....green...green...' I pink up ze phone and I say, 'Yellow?'"
What Is Politics?
Son: Dad, I have to do a special report for school. Can I ask you a question?
Father: Sure, son. What's the question?
Son: What is politics?
Father: Well, let's take our home for example. I am the wage earner, so let's call me Tony Blair. Your mother is the administrator of money, so we'll call her Gordon Brown. We take care of your needs, so we'll call you the People. We'll call the maid the Working Class, and your baby brother we can call the Future. Do you understand, son?
Son: I'm not really sure, Dad. I'll have to think about it.
That night, awakened by his baby brother's crying, the boy went to see what was wrong. Discovering that the baby had seriously soiled his diaper, the boy went to his parents' room and found his mother sound asleep. He went to the maid's room where, peeking through the keyhole, he saw his father in bed with the maid. The boy's knocking went totally unheeded by his father and the maid, so the boy returned to his room and went back to sleep. The next morning he reported to his father.
Son: Dad, now I think I understand what politics is.
Father: Good, son! Can you explain it to me in your own words?
Son: Well, dad, while Tony Blair is screwing the Working Class, Gordon Brown is sound asleep, the People are being completely ignored and the Future is full of shit.
