Super Thread LXXV: Remembering forgotten memories

[Rhino_NQ]

cowboys double GF coming up

 

[Scott Gourley's Lovechild]

You wankers better thump Cronulla

 

[Rhino_NQ]

afternoon

 

[Twizzle]

GF is next week Rhino

 

[Rhino_NQ]

GF is next week Rhino

calling it early, sure it wont backfire at all

 

[Bazal]

I'm enjoying this full time student deal....spending the arvo watching test cricket and drinking.

 

[sensesmaybenumbed]

I'm enjoying this full time student deal....spending the arvo watching test cricket and drinking.

You're living the dream, also being a jerk

 

[Bazal]

In fairness I'm also doing an assignment....by which I mean I've typed roughly 100 words in the last three hours....

 

[sensesmaybenumbed]

In fairness I'm also doing an assignment....by which I mean I've typed roughly 100 words in the last three hours....

Me too.....

But I'm not drinking. I'll have to remedy that.

 

[Rhino_NQ]

Evening. Yay drinking

 

[muzby]

Need some ideas..

My number has somehow made it on to a marketing database for insuranceline, who keep on calling..

I've tried the polite 'not interested' approach.. Didn't work.. I just hang up.. Didn't work..

They call back after a few weeks..

So.. I've decided that given the jerks who call are working on commission, I'll waste as much of their time as possible so they don't get paid.

So far I've handed the phone to a work colleague who kept them going for nearly half an hour.. I've done the 'just give me a second' bit and just picked up the phone occasionally to ensure they're still there, and to say I'm just getting out of the office (done that one a few times.. One time kept a guy there for 15 minutes)..

I've also done it where I sound interested and get them to sign me up for everything.. And then when they ask for credit card details just rattle off a random credit card number with an expiry date from last year..

Lately I've reverted to using characters.. I've been a takeaway restaurant trying to take their order.. Today I was a lonely old man with erectile dysfunction trying to get them to help me..

Looking for a few more ideas / scenarios / characters to use.. I've been a bogan who swears a lot.. Is it inappropriate if I start hitting on them? Particularly the male telemarketers?

Any ideas would be appreciated.. The funnier the better..

Also.. Anyone know if it's possible to do call transfers on mobile phones? Thinking of obtaining the number of someone high up at insuranceline and just transferring the call straight to them each time I get it..

 

[Rhino_NQ]

Need some ideas..

My number has somehow made it on to a marketing database for insuranceline, who keep on calling..

I've tried the polite 'not interested' approach.. Didn't work.. I just hang up.. Didn't work..

They call back after a few weeks..

So.. I've decided that given the jerks who call are working on commission, I'll waste as much of their time as possible so they don't get paid.

So far I've handed the phone to a work colleague who kept them going for nearly half an hour.. I've done the 'just give me a second' bit and just picked up the phone occasionally to ensure they're still there, and to say I'm just getting out of the office (done that one a few times.. One time kept a guy there for 15 minutes)..

I've also done it where I sound interested and get them to sign me up for everything.. And then when they ask for credit card details just rattle off a random credit card number with an expiry date from last year..

Lately I've reverted to using characters.. I've been a takeaway restaurant trying to take their order.. Today I was a lonely old man with erectile dysfunction trying to get them to help me..

Looking for a few more ideas / scenarios / characters to use.. I've been a bogan who swears a lot.. Is it inappropriate if I start hitting on them? Particularly the male telemarketers?

Any ideas would be appreciated.. The funnier the better..

Also.. Anyone know if it's possible to do call transfers on mobile phones? Thinking of obtaining the number of someone high up at insuranceline and just transferring the call straight to them each time I get it..

You've just been kidnapped and am talking to them from someone's car boot while it is moving

 

[Bazal]

You're a drug dealer and you think they have your shipment and are holding out on you

You're Abe Simpson. Don't let them get a word in, just tell absolute nonsense stories

You're a sex hotline

You're the campest, most inappropriate gay man ever and everything is innuendo

You're with ASIO (I mean, 'the government) and you REALLY need to know how they got this number because there is absolutely no way the public should have access and they need to remain calm and stay on the line while you send a team over

 

[muzby]

Thank you gentlemen.. I will be using those..

Well.. Hopefully I don't have to.. But.. If they call again, I will be prepared..

 

[sensesmaybenumbed]

Confusion. Just irritating confusion, asking the same few questions over and over, but phrased differently, and if they tell you you've already asked that, have a list of similarly phrased questions prepared and read it back to them.

Try to sell a product back to them..

Bring the conversation back to footy.

Ask for financial advice.

Give financial advice.

Ask if there are any jobs going. Start fantasising about working together.

 

[Rhino_NQ]

Ask if you should be worried about this rash and the fact that it burns when you pee

 

[Scott Gourley's Lovechild]

f**king Cowboys, how hard is it to beat the Sharks? Even the Dragons beat the Sharks FFS!

 

[Bazal]

Someone replaced the Cowboys with Parramatta

 

[Rhino_NQ]

F%$k f $%kity f@#k f@$k f@%k

 

[sensesmaybenumbed]

F%$k f $%kity f@#k f@$k f@%k

You have 2015. There's that.