Nikau's tragic last night with wife
19 September 2004
By RACHEL GRUNWELL
Sunday Star Times, NZ
Rugby league star Tawera Nikau and his beloved wife Letitia had an ordinary argument on their last night together - but never had the chance to make up.
It is now public knowledge that Nikau's wife committed suicide.
But in a new book on the league player's stunning career, Nikau reveals for the first time the tragic, intimate last moments the couple shared on the night of April 5, 2001.
The family was living in England after Nikau had secured a contract with Warrington Wolves Rugby League Club. Letitia was upset about one of the Warrington players' wives claiming the Nikau family was just in town for the money.
Letitia flared at Nikau: "I'm just sick of these people . . . you don't care about me." Nikau told her not to worry about it, saying: "Don't be so bloody silly. Of course I care about you."
Nikau thought it was a minor row and saw his wife walk into the backyard to have a cigarette. This usually calmed her.
Nikau watched some of the news on television, then glanced outside to see the garage light on and Letitia. Hanging.
"I rush in, grab her, but I can't get her down," writes Nikau. "I find a hacksaw to cut the flex cord and scream to (the couple's daughter) Heaven to call an ambulance. I give Letitia mouth-to-mouth for something like eight or ten minutes. Nothing. I'm freaking out. I can't believe what's happening. This can't be true."
Letitia died in an ambulance on the way to hospital, leaving a devastated family including Heaven, now 18, and son Tyme, 12.
In Standing Tall; the Tawera Nikau story, by Richard Becht, Nikau describes these as the darkest days of his life.
"I remember just sitting on the couch, the three of us . . . holding the kids and hugging them and crying."
Nikau had lost the love of his life, the beautiful girl he charmed 17 years ago in Huntly as a cheeky 18-year-old with a mullet.
"Letitia had been through everything with me. She was my rock.
My world was just broken, totally shattered."
Nikau said he would never know why his "wonderful, lovely and bubbly" wife chose to die.
There were no signs of clinical depression and she was not on medication. Letitia was not the only thing that died that night. Nikau's love for football also went. After her death his heart was no longer in it because he and Letitia were a team - she managed him.
Nikau and his children eventually moved back to Huntly, where Letitia is buried.
Nikau describes Huntly as "the place where my heart is".
"She's no longer with us, but she's in my life every day. Her legacy is the children we have and the lifestyle she did so much to create for us."
But Nikau says he lives life with a smile because that's what Letitia would want for him and his precious children.
Standing Tall; the Tawera Nikau story will be released in bookshops on October 8.
