That Punk promo was AWESOME
Thanks, mate. I had plans for Punk to continue on the route the WWE have him on - but that promo got me interested in perhaps going a different route. Stay tuned.
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We're back from the break and it's United States champion, Antonio Cesaro on his way out to the ring. The cocky European has a mike in hand.
Cesaro: Tonight, you will all witness history as your very European United States Champion beats four of your 'best' to unify the United States and Intercontinental Titles. After I do that, I intend on renaming it something more befitting its status. I was thinking that the European Championship had a good ring to it.
The crowd boos.
Cesaro: There is one man in the match tonight who I have a sliver of respect for. Wade Barrett, an Englishman, understands what it is like to be a swimmer in this sea of filth and mediocrity you call America. Wade, could you join us?
Wade Barrett, the former leader of Nexus and the Corre, makes his way down to the ring and shakes hands with Cesaro.
Barrett: Thank you for the introduction, Antonio. I do beg to differ with you on one point, though. You see, while I have nothing but respect for your talents - I can't see you walking out of here tonight with both straps over your shoulder. You may take one home, I grant you, but the Barrett Barrage will be bringing home some gold of its own.
The two share a moment of mutual respect as the crowd continues to boo.
Barrett: I do like your idea of renaming the titles, but I think you aim too low. Why not rename the world title? The tag titles? Why not call it World Wrestling Europe? It's about time the upstart colonials learned their place in the pecking order.
The fans are saved from further talk by
Woo woo woo, you know it as Zack Ryder comes out to say his part.
Ryder: Renaming the world title? Renaming the company? European superiority? Are you serious, bro?
And he's not waiting for an answer as he, R-Truth, Kofi Kingston, and Santino Marella rush towards the ring to kick start the match.
Match 3 - Antonio Cesaro (c) vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Wade Barrett vs. R-Truth vs. Santino Marella vs. Zack Rydere for the United States and Intercontinental Titles
This one starts with two in the ring and a competitor at each post. The first pinfall is for the United States title and the second for the Intercontinental. Those pinned are eliminated, but those making pins remain in play.
The action comes thick and fast in this one, as some of the WWE's brighest midcard talents put on an exhibition ahead of tonight's draft. R-Truth and Cesaro renew their rivalry while Barrett goes right after Kingston. For their part, Marella and Ryder (both former champions themselves) interject themselves along the way for a few near falls.
It's Marella first eliminated though when his Cobra attempt is countered with a Very European Uppercut from Cesaro who is quick to hit the Neutralizer for the 1-2-3 and retain his title.
Marella's elimination quickly brings R-Truth into the fray and he goes hard after Cesaro, but the tag to Kingston forces the two former partners to do battle. The end comes after a frantic series of exchanges sees Kingston flying off the top rope and caught with the Wasteland from Barrett. Barrett lays out an onrushing R-Truth with the Souvenier Elbow and looks set to claim the gold when he is blind-sided by Cesaro with the Neutralizer.
He's down and Cesaro makes the cover, but Ryder is up on the outside.
1
Ryder crawls into the ring seeking to break it up.
2
Ryder lunges desperately...
3
WINNER AND NEW INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION: Antonio Cesario by pinfall on Wade Barrett in 11:57
Barrett is fuming at the betrayal from his fellow European, but Cesaro isn't hanging around to talk it over. The new joint champion heads to the back as the crowd (and Barrett) bay for his blood.
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Backstage we find Matt Striker and Paul Heyman.
Striker: Mr. Heyman, may I have a word?
Heyman: You can have several, Matt. What do you need?
Striker: You seem remarkably relaxed. You aren't nervous for CM Punk's title defense against Ryback in a Tables, Ladders, and Chairs match tonight?
Heyman: Nervous? Why would I be nervous? My boy, Punk has twice beaten Ryback in these over the top gimmick matches.
Striker: But The Shield...
Heyman: Yes, yes, the title will go to Ryback if Shield interfere tonight. Look, we don't have any affiliation whatsoever with Shield, but if they claim to fight against injustice - they'll keep away tonight. CM Punk being robbed of his title would be the greater injustice than Bret Hart being screwed out of the title in 1997. My client truly is the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be. He's going to prove that tonight. Get yourself a front row seat, Striker. You can see him disprove the myth that is Ryback.
Heyman leaves a stunned Striker holding the mike.
Cole: Words of confidence from Paul Heyman there, but I think his client might be a little less sure of himself.
Layfield: Heyman has a point, Cole. How many times does Punk have to beat this neanderthal before the WWE Universe realises he's nothing more than a flash in the pan?
Lawler: Just once, JBL. Just once without the help of the Shield.
COMMERCIAL
We're back from the break with The Miz in the ring for Miz TV. His guest tonight, he informs us, is Alberto del Rio.
The Mexican star and former champion comes out to a mixed reaction from the crowd, although Lawler and Cole hype up the fact he has twice teamed with The Miz and another legend to embarass 3MB.
Miz: Tonight my guest is Alberto del Rio, my recent partner in crime in the quest to show 3MB up as the jackasses they are. And -
The interview is cut short as 3MB's music hits and Heath Slater, Drew McIntyre, and Jinder Mahal at the head of the ramp looking a little irate.
Slater: Woah, woah, woah. Let me just interrupt you there, Miz. You were going to insult us a bit and then wheel out another geriatric never was in an attempt to embarass us and make people cheer for you.
Miz: I don't know that either of us need to make a special effort to embarass you, boys. You do that all on your own.
Drew McIntyre shoves Slater aside and grabs the mike.
McIntyre: Oi! Listen up, boyo. Nobody's talks to the three man band like that. Get your old man out here so the three of us can come down there and beat some respect into you.
Alberto: Okay, okay. We'll get a partner out here, but I don't think you guys are gonna like it...
The lights go out and the crowd goes nuts. A gong sounds.
Cole: Oh my God! The Undertaker! The Phenom! He's back!
The Undertaker, the living legend, appears in the ring between The Miz and Alberto del Rio and 3MB look utterly terrified.
Layfield: What the hell is he doing here?
Lawler: And what the hell are 3MB going to do against an unstoppable force like the Undertaker?
Cole: I guess we're going to find out!
COMMERCIAL
Match #4 - 3MB vs. The Miz, The Undertaker, and Alberto del Rio
This one is all about Undertaker and the crowd lap it up. After del Rio and Miz both allow 3MB some offense and sell the occasion, the hot tag is made to the Phenom who is quick to lay out all three members of 3MB. A Last Ride puts Mahal to bed, a chokeslam lays out McIntyre, and Slater is left to face the Undertaker one on one.
He throws a punch, has it blocked, throws a second, and gets locked in Hell's Gate. The submission is almost instant.
WINNERS: Undertaker, The Miz, and Alberto del Rio by submission in 6:09
The celebrations are short lived, however, as Shield leap the security barriers. The Miz is quickly down to the floor to square off with them, but Dean Ambrose puts him down with a brutal running knee life. As he staggers to his feet, Seth Rollins catches him with the Black Out (running stomp to the back of the head).
Alberto del Rio leaps to his partner's defense - literally - but his crossbody attempt ends in him being caught by Roman Reigns who charges del Rio into the ring post spine first!
The Undertaker, having tossed Slater out of his ring, turns to face the three interlopers. None of them look game to step into the Undertaker's yard, so they instead circle the ring and then enter from three sides at once!
Ambrose is the first in and gets laid out with a stiff punch and Rollins follows suit. Both are back to their feet quickly to press the assault, but the bigger man won't be worn down by their attacks. It takes a running spear/shoulder block by Roman Reigns to stagger the Dead Man, and then he eats a stiff kick to the side of the skull from Ambrose. He's on hands and knees as Rollins makes him eat canvas with a Black Out, and Shield have laid the Undertaker low on the night of his return! All three lay boots and fists into the fallen legend.
Not satisfied with the beating, Reigns and Rollins drag Undertaker to his knees while Ambrose slides out of the ring to fetch a chair. Miz, stumbling to his feet, gets a taste of the steel before he can intervene.
Undertaker isn't done yet though, he shrugs off his two assailants and plants Rollins with a chokeslam before Reigns can clip him from behind and bring him back to his knees. Ambrose, holding the chair like a baseball bat, spits into his palm and gestures to the rafters before landing a brutal chair shot to the head of the Undertaker.
The no blood policy is clearly out the window as the big man cops it directly (and doubtless wears the $10,000 fine for an unprotected chair shot) and is laid out cold. The fans are merciless in their booing.
The Miz and Alberto del Rio are back to their feet and make to enter the ring, but Shield have apparently finished their work. Ambrose's last gesture is to spit on the prone form of the Undertaker before the trio leap the barricades and disappear as fast as they'd appeared.
Cole: I... I don't know what to say about what we have just witnessed.
Lawler: Shield have crossed the line. They've gone too far.
Layfield: What they have done is made an emphatic statement and written their death warrants at the same time. They got the jump on the Dead Man tonight, but he'll be ready next time. Mark my words, guys, Shield have bitten off more than they can chew.
We head to commercial with Undertaker getting to his feet and staring angrily out into the crowd. He may have been knocked down, but he looks fighting fit. Most of all, he looks mad as hell.
To be continued
