People are trying to push you to be a usurper. They want a civil war.
I mean, you are a total wanker but when it comes to domination of wankery I cannot be matched.
HJ, as you can see I will always be your Joan Of Ark to protect your standing (and title) as the greatest wanker of them all.
It horrified me to think that an upstart appeared out of nowhere, challenging for your title.
When I was young, watching the eels play at Cumberland, many a buck used to challenge one another for the title of the greatest wanker of them all, and so it was, out the back of the main stadium behind the trees, young virile bucks were wanking away and many a story was told over the years, passed down from father to son, as to who was the greatest wanker of them all, but they ALL agree, that a Messiah finally did appear amongst the wankers, during the 1990's, a promised one, who came from the clouds announcing that he was indeed the second coming of the greatest wanker of them all, the master wanker of all wankers whom all wankers had been waiting for.
and ALL eels supporters knew that he was the promised one, the master wanker who would fulfill ALL wanking prophecies.
It is true that Parramatta Jesus was the greatest wanker of them all and even though his fame for wanking was known throughout all the lands, he tired of the many thousands of villagers who would swarm him whenever he passed on by during one of his many ill-fated missions of wankery, that he finally did a Howard Hughes and reinvented himself as Hollywood Jesus. Today, his legend (and legacy) lives on with twelve of his disciples spreading his faith in wankery through forums like this one.
And it was here in this forum amongst some full on wankers that I found my true calling in life following in the steps of the master (my master) wanker, and so Casper Is Here At Your Service HJ. I am your chivalrous knight in armour here to protect your name, your honour and your standing. Would you like for me to create a secret society of wankers where the secrets of all wankery can be protected and passed on down through the generations so that your name and great work will never be forgotten?????
Also, HOG is a wanker but he is not in your class HJ, in fact he would find it challenging getting passed the first degree (of 99 degrees) of initiated wankery.