30 Days of Night (Vampire movie)

[St. Brett]

Shneet ficken shlar fly.
That's German for hello.

Nah, I just made that up....it's probably Japanese for f**k off.

So anyways....I saw this piece of sh*t movie yesterday called 30 Days of Night.
Mellisa George and Josh Hartnett.

I'll get straight to the point.

Brett Gaddes gives it 3 out of 10! Or if that were to be reversed it'd read 7 sh*t houses out of 10.

Rubbish. Balony. Belongs in the trash.

I knew I'd be hustled seeing this. I should have known better and trusted my instincts more.

And can you believe that I actually forked out my own cash for this tripe as I'm out of free movie vouchers?
God damn $11:80 Brett Gaddes had to pay!
Friggin' rip off.

How can Josh Harnett come down in grade to make a movie like this? (I know he has a history of b-grade horror flicks (H-20 and The Faculty) but what has this done to his Hollywood credentials?) Yer, sure it raked in millions at the U.S. box office but so what? You see this movie once, you don't wish to ever see it again.
They're not memorable films.
I know when I'm watching a movie in the cinema if I'll wanna buy it or not on DVD straight away when it comes out.
And this is not one of them.
Josh Harnett was wrongly cast and he should have known better.
He was wrongly cast along side of Harrison Ford in that cop comedy then made the better decision to star in the black delilah, where I took him seriously as an actor, now he goes and does this?

My thoughts on the movie are as follows. It's bland. It lacks direction. The cast virtually have no dialogue. The monsters just appear. They don't explain how they got there or where they came from. They had no purpose. The main vampire spoke in riddles and didn't make sense.
The vampires actually looked stupid.

The movie started out promising but suddenly sunk into despair. Trails off after only 20 minutes into a no brainer.

Seriously, what purpose did the vampires serve? What was their beef?
They had no cause.
This film has nothing on The Lost boys, Fright Night or the under-rated classic vampire movie Near Dark.

30 days of night belongs in the same sh*t depository as Blade 1, 2 and 3. (Christ those Blade movies were terrible.)

Wanna know what's disappointing about 30 days of night? Well, at the start of the movie the evil vampires kill hapless nobody actors quick smart yet when it comes to the main stars of the movie they suddenly decide to slow down and walk and have trouble killing the rest of the cast.
What happens to their fast sleek precision?
Do they just go mental and say, "hey, I can't catch Mellisa George....she's too fast for me."
What jag-offs!

Hey, wasn't the end of 30 days of night similar to how Mellisa George went out on Home & Away with Deiter Brummer on the beach?
She's a terrible actor. Same as Isabel Lucas and Sursok and that skeletor actor from home and away who's over-tanned. (Cassy, is it?) The one who needs a feed.
The only one I do like from home and away is Belle.
She'd be an award winning root.
I'd win a trophy with what I'd do to her.

(Hey, did anyone happen to see Wrong Turn 2? I saw the video cover yesterday in Video Ezy. It went straight to video.....whose seen it?)

Who will this movie 30 days of night impress? Anyone under 16. People without an education. Meth addicts and anyone who lives within a radius of a thousand meters from Campbelltown.

30 days of night needs to be flushed down the sh*t house.

 

[St. Brett]

There, I'm done for the day.

I just e-mailed my letter to the sunday telegraph about that other bullsh*t movie Beowulf.

Letters Editor, Sunday Telegraph

There will be an Angelina Jolie movie coming out soon called Beowulf.
I advise you to save your money and give this flick the arse as A) Christopher Lambert already made this movie first! B) It's all computer animated - even the actors faces have been digitally enhanced (which cheats the paying customer.) And C) It looks like the left-overs of a Lord of the Rings movie similar to that other rubbish '30 Days of Night' (which was filmed in NZ) and used left-over Morks or Morlocks as the vampires.
Seriously, what is this sh*t they're dishing up to the public this day 'n age?
Why are they going out of their way to offend my better judgement?
I'm not being judgemental myself, or anything, but all this computer technology is ruining actors credibility.
It doesn't make for good viewing and pretty soon they will be making stick-figure movies entirely on a P.C. and humans won't be required.
Is this the future of entertainment? Are they still in search of the perfect actor with perfect computer skin so as they can falsely sell their 'Pro-Active' pimple cream and tell the world to look like me? Don't offend me or insult my intelligence!

They better publish that this Sunday or it's a knuckle sandwhich!

I'm going home for now.

Anything else to add?

We watched The Red Dragon last night and if Thomas Harris writes another Hannibal Lector book I'll vomit.
I didn't even bother seeing that latest bullsh*t Hannibal Rising.
The guy needs to focus on something different.
That whole franchise played out.
I went totally off those movies.
Silence of the lambs still remains a classic though. But Edward Norton couldn't save The Red Dragon and that English Patient actor played a sh*t role as C-face.


National Treasure 2 is coming soon too.
Another panic movie complete with fast movie score.
Typical Bruckheimer bullsh*t.
I think NYPD Blue started that whole camera-out-of-focus fast type camera work bullsh*t then Sean Connery and The Rock followed on now this National Treasure 2 is trying to set a new pace and it'll be another worthless piece of sh*t that I'll boycott.

That umm, Ben Stiller movie coming out this Thursday looks funny though.
He marries this blonde and she turns into a complete mental case and despizes his new girlfriend.
I actually wanna buy Meet The Parents as I didn't mind that movie.
Might get it this week.
It's eighteen bucks.
Where am I coming across $18 quid? Friggin' umm, Poltergiest is $18 too.

Everything's sh*t.
Jerry Bruckheimer can get nodded!

P.S.

Coming Soon: Mad Max 4: Beyond Campbelltown - With A Penrith Education.

 

[Eskimo Sharkie]

The Ben Stiller movie you refer to is called "The Heartbreak Kid". It is truly awful.

 

[Mixmasterreece]

Shneet ficken shlar fly.
That's German for hello.

Nah, I just made that up....it's probably Japanese for f**k off.

So anyways....I saw this piece of sh*t movie yesterday called 30 Days of Night.
Mellisa George and Josh Hartnett.

I'll get straight to the point.

Brett Gaddes gives it 3 out of 10! Or if that were to be reversed it'd read 7 sh*t houses out of 10.

Rubbish. Balony. Belongs in the trash.

I knew I'd be hustled seeing this. I should have known better and trusted my instincts more.

And can you believe that I actually forked out my own cash for this tripe as I'm out of free movie vouchers?
God damn $11:80 Brett Gaddes had to pay!
Friggin' rip off.

How can Josh Harnett come down in grade to make a movie like this? (I know he has a history of b-grade horror flicks (H-20 and The Faculty) but what has this done to his Hollywood credentials?) Yer, sure it raked in millions at the U.S. box office but so what? You see this movie once, you don't wish to ever see it again.
They're not memorable films.
I know when I'm watching a movie in the cinema if I'll wanna buy it or not on DVD straight away when it comes out.
And this is not one of them.
Josh Harnett was wrongly cast and he should have known better.
He was wrongly cast along side of Harrison Ford in that cop comedy then made the better decision to star in the black delilah, where I took him seriously as an actor, now he goes and does this?

My thoughts on the movie are as follows. It's bland. It lacks direction. The cast virtually have no dialogue. The monsters just appear. They don't explain how they got there or where they came from. They had no purpose. The main vampire spoke in riddles and didn't make sense.
The vampires actually looked stupid.

The movie started out promising but suddenly sunk into despair. Trails off after only 20 minutes into a no brainer.

Seriously, what purpose did the vampires serve? What was their beef?
They had no cause.
This film has nothing on The Lost boys, Fright Night or the under-rated classic vampire movie Near Dark.

30 days of night belongs in the same sh*t depository as Blade 1, 2 and 3. (Christ those Blade movies were terrible.)

Wanna know what's disappointing about 30 days of night? Well, at the start of the movie the evil vampires kill hapless nobody actors quick smart yet when it comes to the main stars of the movie they suddenly decide to slow down and walk and have trouble killing the rest of the cast.
What happens to their fast sleek precision?
Do they just go mental and say, "hey, I can't catch Mellisa George....she's too fast for me."
What jag-offs!

Hey, wasn't the end of 30 days of night similar to how Mellisa George went out on Home & Away with Deiter Brummer on the beach?
She's a terrible actor. Same as Isabel Lucas and Sursok and that skeletor actor from home and away who's over-tanned. (Cassy, is it?) The one who needs a feed.
The only one I do like from home and away is Belle.
She'd be an award winning root.
I'd win a trophy with what I'd do to her.

(Hey, did anyone happen to see Wrong Turn 2? I saw the video cover yesterday in Video Ezy. It went straight to video.....whose seen it?)

Who will this movie 30 days of night impress? Anyone under 16. People without an education. Meth addicts and anyone who lives within a radius of a thousand meters from Campbelltown.

30 days of night needs to be flushed down the sh*t house.

Having had something to do with this movie when it was filmed over here, I find your 'review' interesting.

'A no brainer' you say? What were you expecting ? f**king schindlers list? The film was marketed as an horror/action flick to reflect the graphic novel, which focussed on gore - have you read the novel?

What was the vampires beef? What was their cause? Well bretles, unless im wrong, vampires don't like sunlight? I think a town plunged into darkness for 30 days would be reasonably appealing to them?

Also unless im mistaken most reviewers are not 16, uneducated or meth addicts - and from what ive read the movie did well with a lot of reviewers and with users on imdb.com.

God knows, maybe the movie lacked the appropriate levels of incest you get off on Brett?

 

[Everlovin' Antichrist]

Well, a negative review from that f**king idiot will no doubt dampen no one's enthusiasm for this movie.

 

[strewth_mate]

Went and saw this movie, for what it's worth I didn't mind it. It's a vampire movie after all, not typically bastions of groundbreaking awesomeness.

Wondered though, I don't know why the vampires really bothered. If they were just out for a one-off romp, fair enough. But seeing as they specifically didn't want to 'turn' any of the people, that the town only goes through that period once per year and that almost everywhere else in the world has a normal day/night cycle, if they're harbouring any intention to take over the world, or even attack any other place, it hasn't gotten them anywhere. Besides, that town won't repopulate anytime soon, so repetition isn't too likely.

I suppose it's nice that they've identified the one place that will let them run free for a month, but all they did was wander around until it was too late, and as far as things to do go they're pretty much buggered from here.

 

[OVP]

Having had something to do with this movie when it was filmed over here, I find your 'review' interesting.

'A no brainer' you say? What were you expecting ? f**king schindlers list? The film was marketed as an horror/action flick to reflect the graphic novel, which focussed on gore - have you read the novel?

What was the vampires beef? What was their cause? Well bretles, unless im wrong, vampires don't like sunlight? I think a town plunged into darkness for 30 days would be reasonably appealing to them?

Also unless im mistaken most reviewers are not 16, uneducated or meth addicts - and from what ive read the movie did well with a lot of reviewers and with users on imdb.com.

God knows, maybe the movie lacked the appropriate levels of incest you get off on Brett?

Go easy on him mate. He's a Souffs fan. He might even be a "SPECIAL" person

 

[strewth_mate]

He's a Souffs fan.

He is?

 

[TITAN1]

Ah,that explains all that anger.;-)

 

[smeghead]

And can you believe that I actually forked out my own cash for this tripe as I'm out of free movie vouchers?
God damn $11:80 Brett Gaddes had to pay!

If you are paying those prices it would seem you are not using your money. You are using our money, those of us who work and pay taxes.

Try and review a home movie of you shooting yourself please

 

[strewth_mate]

:lol: he's not a Souths fan, I don't know where that came from.