Best line from a movie

[Hass]

Here's the Diner Scene from 5 easy pieces. I've underlined the best line in the scene. Just a note- Jack Nicholson is Dupea.

Dupea: I'd like a plain omelette, no potatoes, tomatoes instead, a cup of coffee, and wheat toast.
Waitress: (She points to the menu) No substitutions.
Dupea: What do you mean? You don't have any tomatoes?
Waitress: Only what's on the menu. You can have a number two - a plain omelette. It comes with cottage fries and rolls.
Dupea: Yeah, I know what it comes with. But it's not what I want.
Waitress: Well, I'll come back when you make up your mind.
Dupea: Wait a minute. I have made up my mind. I'd like a plain omelette, no potatoes on the plate, a cup of coffee, and a side order of wheat toast.
Waitress: I'm sorry, we don't have any side orders of toast...an English muffin or a coffee roll.
Dupea: What do you mean you don't make side orders of toast? You make sandwiches, don't you?
Waitress: Would you like to talk to the manager?
Dupea: ...You've got bread and a toaster of some kind?
Waitress: I don't make the rules.
Dupea: OK, I'll make it as easy for you as I can. I'd like an omelette, plain, and a chicken salad sandwich on wheat toast, no mayonnaise, no butter, no lettuce. And a cup of coffee.
Waitress: A number two, chicken sal san, hold the butter, the lettuce and the mayonnaise. And a cup of coffee. Anything else?
Dupea: Yeah. Now all you have to do is hold the chicken, bring me the toast, give me a check for the chicken salad sandwich, and you haven't broken any rules.
Waitress (spitefully): You want me to hold the chicken, huh?
Dupea: <u>I want you to hold it between your knees</u>.
Waitress (turning and telling him to look at the sign that says, "No Substitutions") Do you see that sign, sir? Yes, you'll all have to leave. I'm not taking any more of your smartness and sarcasm.
Dupea: You see this sign? (He sweeps all the water glasses and menus off the table.)

Cheers.

 

[imported_Bigbopper]

From When Harry met Sally, you all know the scene
"I'll have what she's having"
Just as a trivia question who can name the actor that spoke the line?
Cheers
Bigbopper 

 

[imported_eels fan...]

The director, Rob Reiner, mum Estelle.

 

[SpaceMonkey]

Who can forget a couple of classics from Christian Bale as Patrick Bateman in American Psycho?
1: In a trendy nightclub, Bateman tries to pay for his drinks with a credit card.
Barmaid:"No credit cards. This is a cash bar."
Bateman (as she walks off to get his drink): "You ugly bitch, I'm going to cut off your head and play around in your blood."
2: In another trendy nightspot:
Girl: "So what is it that you do?"
Bateman: Oh, I'm mostly into murders and executions.
Girl: "Oh my boyfreind's into mergers and acquisitions!"

 

[tigger]

As good as it gets -Jack Nicholson - "Karen the waitress, meet Simon the androtop"
Lockstock - 'It cheap like a budgie'
- 'You've got Liberia's deficit in your SkyRocket'
- Whats this then? Its a Cocktail. I asked for refreshing drink, you could fall in love with an Orangutan in that. If you want a Pint, go to the Pub. I thought this was a pub! It is, its a Samoan Pub.
Scarface - "You f**king with me, you f**king with the best"
The Castle - "That is going straight to the pool room'

 

[SpaceMonkey]

Shows that the makers of "Lock, Stock..." now f**k all about Samoans though. All your likely to get in a Samoan pub is a jug of Vailima, or a pool cue round the back of the head if you look at someone the wrong way.

 

[imported_eels fan...]

The Thin Man...
"I read you were shot five times in the tabloids." "It's not true. He didn't come anywhere near my tabloids."

The Midnight Cowboy...
"Well, I'll tell you the truth now. I ain't a real cowboy, but I am one helluva stud."

Scarface...
(Pfeiffer/Elvira to Pacino/Tony) "Can't you stop saying 'f**k' all the time?" (comes completely out of the blue!)
&amp;
(Pacino/Tony)
"All I have in this world is balls and my word and I don't break 'em for no one. You understand?"
&amp;
(Pacino/Tony)
"You wanna f**k with me? Okay. You wanna play rough? Okay. Say hello to my little friend." (Easily the best line/scene in the movie!)

The list could be longer, Scarface is just a treasure trove of 1 liners.

 

[imported_Jackal]

" The AK-47 .... when you absolutely, positivelygodda kill every mother-f**ker in the room .... except no substitutes." Samuel L Jackson, Jackie Brown.

 

[imported_Raging Bulldog]

Here's a couple from Con Air, which I saw once again last night.
To set the scene, the stolen plane the convicts have taken has just left Learner Airfield after a desperated shoot out with Law Enforcement, and the convicts are laughing and dancing inside the plane whilst the music of Sweet Home Alabama - Lynyrd Skynyrd is supplying the grooves.The worst serial killer on board Garland Greene (Steve Buscemi), turns around to Cameron Poe (Nicolas Cage), after watching the others celebrating on board and says ...
'Define irony?' ........ ' Bunch of idiots, dancing on a plane, to a song made famous by a band that died ... in a plane crash.'
Here's another. Whilst the convicts are on Con Air and have allreadytaken over the plane,Johnny-23 (Danny Trejo) approaches a handcuffed (female) Guard Bishop (Rachel Ticotni), and tells here that she is about to become his 24th rape victim, as he has already been convicted of 23 (hence his name), proof bythe 23 roses that he displays by the tattoo's on his arm. Just before he is about to do so, Cyrus 'the Virus' (John Malkovich), abdrupty interrupts him and says ...
' Can you fly Johnny? (he answers 'no') ........ 'You keep that in mind when you look at her. Because, if your dick jumps out of your pants ... you jump out of this plane!'
Last one. Serial killerGarland Greene (Steve Buscemi), is giving Cameron Poe (Nicolas Cage) his definition on insanity. Poe has just told Greene, that serial killers Darmer, Gacy and Bundy, that Greene made mention of,were insane. Greene replies ...
'Now you're talkins semantics ... What if I told you insane was working 50hrs a week in some office for 50yrs, at the end of which they tell you to "piss off. " Ending up in some retirement village, hoping to die before sufferring the indignity of trying to make it to the toilet on time .... Wouldn't you consider that to be insane?"
As you can all see, I'm a huge fan of this movie as an action flick and some of the best lines ever. I can keep going on, but than I'll have to start charging (video) rental fees.
Watch the movie again. It's a beauty.

 

[imported_Roopy4246]

I can't remember where this is from, except that it was an English TV series, and it has just stuck in my mind.

A younger guy was talking to an old and wise friend about his problems. He asked the old guy to tell him something wise. The old guy, who looked like a serious drinker, thought about it for a while, looked him in the eye, and said "In a public house rest room, incoming traffic always has right of way."

 

[Johnsy]

A couple form as good as it gets

as tigger said "Karen the waitress meet Simon the androtop", and "you make me want to be a better man"
One form harlem nights,
"who left a swallow in the bottle"
"If its just a swallow, swallow it and shut the f**k up"

Johnsy

 

[legend]

What a great movie. That movie made me almost wet my pants. That old fella from Sanford and Son is a crach up. Very funny movie.

 

[legend]

Here's one for Mud. This line comes from Any which way you can. The leader of the bikie gang(the black widows) is trying to motivate his boys into getting a little payback on Philo Beddoe(Clint Eastwood). Just as he is getting them all revved up smoke starts pouring out from the kitchen and oneof the bikie gang moans "my brownies are burning". The leader of the gang turns around and says" why me Lord?" " Some men you made out of clay, mine, you made out of shit".

 

[imported_Mailman]

The funniest man on tv would have to be Homer Simpson. He is an absolute legend. Here are a few quotes from Homer J himself:

"The only guys who were Hawaiian shirts are gay guys and big fat party animals..."

"Son, when you attend sporting events, its not whether you win or lose its how drunk you get..."

"Now son, you don't want to drink beer. That's for Daddies, and kids with fake IDs..."

"If you really want something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers. "

"Lisa, Vampires are make believe, like Elves, Gremlins, and Eskimos..."

"I saw this in a movie about a bus that had to speed around a city, keeping its speed over 50, and if its speed changed, it would explode! I think it was called, The Bus That Couldn't Slow Down."

"Lisa, if you don't like your job you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way. "

"Hello opperator? Give me the number for 911."

" What are you going to do? Release the dogs? or the Bees? Or the dogs with bees in there mouth and when they bark they shoot bees at you? "

" English? Who needs that, I'm never going to England. "

&lt;RED>

 

[Dog-T]

when that badassed dougy van dam said WRONG BET

 

[imported_Jackal]

Thanks for the quotesRaging Bulldog (post 29), as that's also one of my favourite action movies.
Wasn't John Malkovich awesome in that movie?

 

[imported_TaxiDriver_]

The Sure Thing
"I hope you fully comprehend the magnitude of your impending good fortune"
Truckie to John Cusack as John Cusack is onhis way to a "sure thing"

Taxi Driver
"You talkin' to me ?"

Godfather
"it means Luca Brazzi sleeps with the fishes"
"it's not personal, it's business"
"never go against the family"

Jaws
"we gotta get a bigger boat"
And finally this one needs no into.

"this one time at band camp"

 

[legend]

How about "Greed is good"

" Hell is the impossibility of reason. That's what this place feels like"

"I made him an offer he couldnt refuse"

 

[Garbage]

taxidriver - you forgot martin scorcese's quote in the movie "ever seen what a 44 magnum can do to a woman's pussy?"

 

[El Duque]

Ya gotta love it when Jules first blurts this line out

There's a passage I got memorized,seems appropriate for thissituation: Ezekiel 25:17. "The pathof the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in thename of charity and good will,shepherds the weak through thevalley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finderof lost children.And I willstrike down upon thee with greatvengeance and furious anger thosewho attempt to poison and destroymy brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay myvengeance upon you."