Onion coach: Just kick it Sammy
Sam: Shouldn't I try having a run sir?
Onion coach: Sam, no. Okay. No. Just kick the ball whenever you get 1 of you 2 touches, and give the opposing fullback a polite clap if he marks the ball..
Sam: Dafuq is a mark?
Onion coach: I don't expect a mungo like yourself to understand the intricacies of rugby Sam. So just kick the ball out, and let 2 of your team mates grab you by the groin, lift you up and give you a cuddle so we may kick it out once again. Got it?..
Sam: .....
Onion coach: Sam. Sam!...
Sam: Hello, Ruste?...