Old Kogarah Boy 1
First Grade
- Messages
- 5,415
Dear Doctor
Having recently continued with more medical check ups than a recalled Jeep under warranty, l wish to make a formal complaint about getting old. Only last week, you made the prognosis that l was in pretty good shape. I regret to inform you that this is not the case.
My blood pressure is rising faster than a young lad watching his first blue movie.
My hearing has long left me, to such an extent that when l'm in a liquor store, l say yes to everything.
My eyesight fails me daily ..... did l tell you l've increased my computer monitor screen size to 120 inch!
My liver. which has served me so well over the years, puts up an argument about anything with the slightest hint of alcohol.
My tastebuds, which use to identify only the finest spirits and wines, now settles on the wife's cooking Sherry.
My bowels use to store more goods than a Bunnings superstore but now refuse to hold any stock at all and now run a permanent 'Clearance Sale' on a daily basis.
My bladder is as useless as an ashtray on a motorbike and now resembles Niagara Falls at any given hour of the night.
My wind problem has reached epidemic proportions and is now threatening the local bird population.
Could l please request a second opinion.
Yours faithfully,
OKB
Having recently continued with more medical check ups than a recalled Jeep under warranty, l wish to make a formal complaint about getting old. Only last week, you made the prognosis that l was in pretty good shape. I regret to inform you that this is not the case.
My blood pressure is rising faster than a young lad watching his first blue movie.
My hearing has long left me, to such an extent that when l'm in a liquor store, l say yes to everything.
My eyesight fails me daily ..... did l tell you l've increased my computer monitor screen size to 120 inch!
My liver. which has served me so well over the years, puts up an argument about anything with the slightest hint of alcohol.
My tastebuds, which use to identify only the finest spirits and wines, now settles on the wife's cooking Sherry.
My bowels use to store more goods than a Bunnings superstore but now refuse to hold any stock at all and now run a permanent 'Clearance Sale' on a daily basis.
My bladder is as useless as an ashtray on a motorbike and now resembles Niagara Falls at any given hour of the night.
My wind problem has reached epidemic proportions and is now threatening the local bird population.
Could l please request a second opinion.
Yours faithfully,
OKB
