Bastard Squad
Coach
- Messages
- 13,481
1 . Rod Marsh & Ian Botham:
When Botham took guard in an Ashes match, Marsh welcomed him to the
wicket with the immortal words: "So how's your wife & my kids?"
2. Daryll Cullinan & Shane Warne:
As Cullinan was on his way to the wicket, Warne told him he had been
waiting 2 years for another chance to humiliate him. "Looks like you
spent it eating," Cullinan retorted.
3. Glenn McGrath & Eddo Brandes:
After Brandes played & missed at a McGrath delivery, the Aussie bowler
politely enquired: "Oi, Brandes, why are you so fat?" "Cos every time I
f**k your wife she gives me a biscuit," Brandes replied.
4. Robin Smith & Merv Hughes:
During 1989 Lords Test Hughes said to Smith after he played & missed:
"You can't f**king bat". Smith to Hughes after he smacked him to the
boundary: "Hey Merv, we make a fine pair. I can't f**king bat & you
can't f**king bowl."
5. Merv Hughes & Javed Miandad:
During 1991 Adelaide Test, Javed called Merv a fat bus conductor. A few
balls latter Merv dismissed Javed: "Tickets please", Merv called out as
he ran past the departing batsman.
6. Merv Hughes & Viv Richards:
During a test match in the West Indies, Hughes didn't say a word to Viv,
but continued to stare at him after deliveries. "This is my island, my
culture. Don't you be staring at me. In my culture we just bowl." Merv
didn't reply, but after he dismissed him he announced to the batsman:
"In my culture we just say f**k *ff."
7. Ricky Ponting & Shaun Pollock:
After going past the outside edge with a couple of deliveries, Pollock
told Ponting: "It's red, round & weighs about 5 ounces." Unfortunately
for Pollock, the next ball was hammered out of the ground. Ponting to
Pollock: "you know what it looks like, now go find it."
8. And of course you can't forget Ian Healy's legendary comment
which was picked up by the Channel 9 microphones when Arjuna Ranatunga
called for a runner on a particularly hot night during a one dayer in Sydney...
"You don't get a runner for being an overweight, unfit, fat merkin!!!"
When Botham took guard in an Ashes match, Marsh welcomed him to the
wicket with the immortal words: "So how's your wife & my kids?"
2. Daryll Cullinan & Shane Warne:
As Cullinan was on his way to the wicket, Warne told him he had been
waiting 2 years for another chance to humiliate him. "Looks like you
spent it eating," Cullinan retorted.
3. Glenn McGrath & Eddo Brandes:
After Brandes played & missed at a McGrath delivery, the Aussie bowler
politely enquired: "Oi, Brandes, why are you so fat?" "Cos every time I
f**k your wife she gives me a biscuit," Brandes replied.
4. Robin Smith & Merv Hughes:
During 1989 Lords Test Hughes said to Smith after he played & missed:
"You can't f**king bat". Smith to Hughes after he smacked him to the
boundary: "Hey Merv, we make a fine pair. I can't f**king bat & you
can't f**king bowl."
5. Merv Hughes & Javed Miandad:
During 1991 Adelaide Test, Javed called Merv a fat bus conductor. A few
balls latter Merv dismissed Javed: "Tickets please", Merv called out as
he ran past the departing batsman.
6. Merv Hughes & Viv Richards:
During a test match in the West Indies, Hughes didn't say a word to Viv,
but continued to stare at him after deliveries. "This is my island, my
culture. Don't you be staring at me. In my culture we just bowl." Merv
didn't reply, but after he dismissed him he announced to the batsman:
"In my culture we just say f**k *ff."
7. Ricky Ponting & Shaun Pollock:
After going past the outside edge with a couple of deliveries, Pollock
told Ponting: "It's red, round & weighs about 5 ounces." Unfortunately
for Pollock, the next ball was hammered out of the ground. Ponting to
Pollock: "you know what it looks like, now go find it."
8. And of course you can't forget Ian Healy's legendary comment
which was picked up by the Channel 9 microphones when Arjuna Ranatunga
called for a runner on a particularly hot night during a one dayer in Sydney...
"You don't get a runner for being an overweight, unfit, fat merkin!!!"
