OT: Kiwi jokes

[gunnamatta bay]

A Kiwi walks into his bedroom carrying a sheep in his arms and says:
"Darling, this is the pig I have sex with when you have a headache."
His wife is lying in bed and replies:
"I think you'll find that's not a pig but a sheep, you idiot."
The man says: " Shut up, I wasn't talking to you."

 

[madunit]

what do you call a kiwi with a goat under one arm and a sheep under the other?

baa-sexual

 

[Card Shark]

A Kiwi walks into his bedroom carrying a sheep in his arms and says:
"Darling, this is the pig I have sex with when you have a headache."
His wife is lying in bed and replies:
"I think you'll find that's not a pig but a sheep, you idiot."
The man says: " Shut up, I wasn't talking to you."

That's funny.

SBW?

 

[Madsharkie]

A Kiwi walks into his bedroom carrying a sheep in his arms and says:
"Darling, this is the pig I have sex with when you have a headache."
His wife is lying in bed and replies:
"I think you'll find that's not a pig but a sheep, you idiot."
The man says: " Shut up, I wasn't talking to you."

Lol :lol:

 

[Feej]

A Kiwi walks into his bedroom carrying a sheep in his arms and says:
"Darling, this is the pig I have sex with when you have a headache."
His wife is lying in bed and replies:
"I think you'll find that's not a pig but a sheep, you idiot."
The man says: " Shut up, I wasn't talking to you."

what do you call a kiwi with a goat under one arm and a sheep under the other?

baa-sexual

 

[Surely]

Kiwi went into a fish and chip shop and asked for, "Fush n Chups."

The owner of the shop said, "You are from New Zealand aren't you."

Kiwi said, "How do you know that?"

Owner "Well, here in Australia we say "chips", whereas you said "chups".

A bit miffed the kiwi spends the next six months practicing to say fish and chips

After 6 months and confident he had it down pat he goes back to the shop

Owner says what would you like

Kiwi in his best Aussie accent says fish and chips please

Owner says you'd have to be a kiwi wouldn't you

What gave it away says the kiwi

Well mate this has been a hardware store for 5 months

 

[bluey]

How do you get a kiwi into a small business

Give them a big one.

 

[Quigs]

 

[BatteredFlake]

A Kiwi walks into his bedroom carrying a sheep in his arms and says:
"Darling, this is the pig I have sex with when you have a headache."
His wife is lying in bed and replies:
"I think you'll find that's not a pig but a sheep, you idiot."
The man says: " Shut up, I wasn't talking to you."

An Aussie just finished telling that joke to the Kiwi sitting next to him at the club.

The Kiwi Jumped up and grabbed a huge All Black from the next table and brought him back.

Now tell Him what you just told me Bro!!!!

Nahhh, Said the Aussie.

Hah! You're a Coward!! Said the Kiwi Triumphantly!

Nahhh.. said the Aussie ..I just couldn't be bothered Explaining it 6 times ,Again!