Useless Articles of Clothing And Accessories

[veggiepatch1959]

I saw a guy dressed very strangely the other day and it got me thinking about clothing which serves no purpose and/or is impractical. He was wearing a dress shirt, a necktie, a jacket.......and a pair of tracksuit pants finished off with a pair of sandals. I thought "what are you on about" and got to thinking about neckties and the like.

1. Neckties - what purpose do they serve other than to make one feel uncomfortable when worn properly? Is it some sort of power trip or superiority felt by the wearer?

2. Cufflinks - an absurd accessory. Don't long sleeved shirts have buttons on their sleeves?

3. Leather patches on jackets (usually Tweed jackets) - to me, it indicates that the wearer is a lazy, unproductive merkin who has his elbows on a desk all day.

4. Cumberbunds - are they designed to hide a roll of fat on the wearer?

5. Hats and caps - the only purpose they serve is for safety (motorcycle helmets/hardhats) or sun protection reasons. So why do people wear hats and caps indoors or at night? Probably to advertise some dumb brand at an exorbitant cost to the wearer. Oh....and don't get me started on women's fascinators!

Most of the above only serve to obey some wanky, archaic dress code which is downright f**king pretentious.

Feel free to add yours.

 

[TheFrog]

1. Neckties -

Apparently, the purpose of a tie is to separate what is above it from what is below it. So a businessman will think with his big head, not his little one.

 

[Bazal]

2. Cufflinks - an absurd accessory. Don't long sleeved shirts have buttons on their sleeves?

I suppose I shouldn't be shocked that you've clearly never heard of French cuffs....

 

[veggiepatch1959]

I suppose I shouldn't be shocked that you've clearly never heard of French cuffs....

Never heard of the f**kers.

After finding out what they are, I wish I never did. Just another piece of wankery from the "look at me" brigade.

 

[Life's Good]

Male G string. WTF. Especially when it’s worn in reverse.

 

[Pommy]

I don’t wear them very often but I do like a nice set of cuff links.

 

[Iafeta]

Male G string. WTF. Especially when it’s worn in reverse.

Reverse?

 

[Iafeta]

Agree on neckties. All ties, frankly. I've seen it a few times at work where they have a meeting and go oh I propose all blokes where ties. Then it goes to a vote. The broads unanimously throw their hands up , blokes not so much. They're uncomfortable. In summer on days like yesterday as an example frankly they're restrictive to the max. Hate them with a passion.

 

[Life's Good]

Reverse?

Apologies if that image is now burned in your head.

 

[Iafeta]

I can't even imagine it thank god. It sounds truly terrifying.

 

[Life's Good]

Not so much an article of clothing, more an accessory but the Burberry/Coach bumbag slung over the shoulder of a would be, try hard, wanna be, low life gangsta.
This is usually accompanied by a cap with a $ symbol on the awful shaven head of a GStar jumper wearing douchebag.
It’s not uncommon to see groups of these sh*tstains all dressed alike & roaming the streets late at night like the sheep that they are.

 

[Bazal]

I don’t wear them very often but I do like a nice set of cuff links.

I prefer French cuffs for weddings and shit where it starts formal, but after about five beers gets quite a bit looser. Pop the cuffs, roll the sleeves up and kick on. That said I only own two pairs of cuff links.

There's plenty to be said for formal wear, especially in the eyes of the fairer sex. Seems to me this veggiepatch fella is a typical whinging old fart who yearns for the seventies...

 

[Eion]

The sandle.

We already have thongs and shoes. Choose one ffs.

 

[Evil Homer]

Waistcoats, f**king hate them and they make the wearer look ridiculous IMO

 

[muzby]

i've never really understood the appeal of pants...

 

[veggiepatch1959]

i've never really understood the appeal of pants...

Pants are for dogs, especially after some vigorous exercise.

 

[veggiepatch1959]

There's plenty to be said for formal wear, especially in the eyes of the fairer sex. Seems to me this veggiepatch fella is a typical whinging old fart who yearns for the seventies...

Yeah sure.

Considering the items I mentioned in my original post have been around for hundreds of years.

Maybe someone is yearning for the 1770s?

 

[Iafeta]

I prefer French cuffs for weddings and shit where it starts formal, but after about five beers gets quite a bit looser. Pop the cuffs, roll the sleeves up and kick on. That said I only own two pairs of cuff links.

There's plenty to be said for formal wear, especially in the eyes of the fairer sex. Seems to me this veggiepatch fella is a typical whinging old fart who yearns for the seventies...

Maaaate. It's like driving a fourth hand BMW. You shouldn't need it unless you're compensating for a certain shortfall in your God given genetics.

 

[Pommy]

AFL wife beaters. What’s wrong with sleeves?

 

[Bazal]

Maaaate. It's like driving a fourth hand BMW. You shouldn't need it unless you're compensating for a certain shortfall in your God given genetics.

I don't believe in god mate.

Maybe that explains some things....