tits&tans, for the Titans, bounds on to the grass, fired up and thirsty for Blue blood. As a tribute to the quality of this year's F7s, he pulls this out of the Bag.
(Puzzle results will be posted after the match results or PM me if you can't wait
)
743 Words (OWC) below the ***
**************************************
Puzzletastic Redux
From the Editor:It’s that time of the year again; the weather perfect, the atmosphere tense, the cheerleaders poised, the fans expectant and the teams pumped.
It’s time to take your brains out of their jars, shake off that slimy embalming fluid and plug them in.
That’s right folks, it’s Grand Final Puzzle Time! Once again, following our annual tradition, League Puzzle gives our loyal readers a chance to test their wits and knowledge against the finest statisticians we could dredge up from our mildewed basement offices.
This year, for all of our online friends out there, we are going to delve into the slightly bizarre world of online writing with a look at the web-renowned F7s competition.
So, without further ado, let’s begin.
All of the following clues relate to articles written for matches during the 2009 F7s season (excluding representative games). Having deciphered the clues and found the appropriate article, take the first letter of the title of that article and an inspirational message shall appear. Only those who are truly worthy shall receive this sagacious piece of advice.
(Hint: the words in italics
might help you identify the team, author, content or title)
1. In the first GF rematch of the season, a titanic effort was made to warm up this soup and keep the rice fishy.
2. Only a fraction of an hour long, this was a terrifying, fire-breathing beast of a Round 3 article that reminisced about the antics of the Topknots and the Brolgas in an epic 1966 duel.
3. Up against the mighty Kiwis, this second round article launched into a sinewy and willowy overview of the possible impending doom of a certain group of prehistoric fish.
4. This fourth round article rabbits on about the bone-crunching, torso-smashing hits that good ol’ Greg gives.
5. Up against the might of the pussies in Round 4, this self-help manual should help c**ks deal with a good flogging (absolutely no pun intended!).
6. This fifth round article sent our basement statto’s into a fit of euphoric salivation, as they realized that this magic system might ‘actuary’ marshal arguments to change the very face of the NRL.
7. From a DUBious Point of View, this proxy posting for George’s team in the sixth round tells a tale of tricks and traps that tends to tragedy and loss … or perhaps not.
8. A fantasy-tical SoOlution to the perennial Original problem, proudly proposed by the Panther’s in their Round 7 battle with the Eels.
(Insert a comma here)
9. Playing as a proud Panther in the last round, this author recounts a stormy Grand Final and the events since that have made it all seem like easy blue water sailing for this team
10. In the third Warriors/Titans head-to-head, this article waxes lyrical about the anatomical benefits of and pays homage to a group of long-term friends, even though they so often take the piss.
11. In the semi-final stage of this competition, this inimitable article names a reason why the Afrikaans, Danish, Dutch, French, German, Italian, Spanish, Swedish, Greek, Russians, Portuguese, Japanese and Koreans all speak the same language.
12. As a cautionary tale of Wombats and wickedness for all coaches, this Round 9 offering was carefully crafted to shock and amuse by misleading the reader.
13. This nutty League film review in Round 8 details a new Kiwi motion picture in the making that has an all star cast.
14. Against the god-like Greeks in Round 8, this article describes a marriage made in League heaven as the author makes a crucial agreement and rocks on.
15. Money makes the world go round and round and round, until it becomes crazy. A big mix of money and lucrative sponsorship deals will be future of the NRL, this Minor Semi-Final article argues.
16. In a preview of this year’s GF, this seminal look at a year of F7s from the DailySpurt left no doubt as to who the breast men and who the coqs are.
17. In an all out religious war against the fiery, scaly monsters in the last round, this proxy article preaches the insanity of the TV and newspaper coverage of our beloved game.
18. In the first of a three-in-a-row run against last year’s champions, this Warrior’s plight of passion and hatred describes how a one-eyed obsession threatened to overcome the author’s love of the game.
(Insert an exclamation mark here)
Happy Puzzling!