Round 5 Titans v Rabbitohs 2010

[The Piper]

Forum 7s - Round 5 2010
GOLD COAST TITANS v SOUTH SYDNEY RABBITOHS

-v-

Game Thread:
* Please note - This is a game thread only, therefore only game posts can be made here (Teams, Articles).
* Any other posts may result in loss of points and is at the discretion of the referee.
* Only original articles, not used in previous games, will be marked by referees.

Naming Teams:
* 5v5 (+ 2 reserves for visiting team, 3 reserves for home team)
* No 'TBA' or changing players named
* Captains must stick with original teams named

ALL THE RULES & REGULATIONS: http://f7s.leagueunlimited.com/rules.php

FULL TIME: Thursday 27th May 2010 at 9pm (Sydney time)
REFEREE: Antonius
Venue: Skilled Park

**The Referee Blows Game On!**
CLICK HERE FOR OFFICIAL WORD COUNTER

 

[Titanic]

The Titans burst out of the surf at Main and head for the showers en route to the field... it's certainly not good form to play sweaty footy covered in sandy sea salt. What? Is that a dagger I see before me? No, it's that weapon Big Pete making his debut for the Titans:

1. Amadean
4. Big Pete
6. tits&tans
11. Titanic
13. TITs ANonymouS

Bench

2. Tittoolate
3. Misanthrope
8. bgdc

 

[byrne_rovelli_fan82]

Rabbitohs:

byrne_rovelli_fan82
Marshall_Magic
griffo346
Bumble
miccle

Bench:
Pistol
rabs

 

[Titanic]

Titanic for the Titans (733 OWC)
...hits the field running. Chips, regathers and dives over in the corner and then realises nobody else is playing... packs up his ball and goes home.
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​

Anarchy

Aging definitely has some disadvantages, not the least of which is grappling with change.

Nobody can successfully argue that change doesn’t have its place. I offer “ensuring that the game is relevant to contemporary society’s expectations” as one good reason for change. “Embracing advances of sports technology” is another that stands out.

Change may take many forms. The rules, ticket prices, jerseys, even clubs and the game’s management structure are among a list of many more that I’m sure you all have debated at some time or other.

Conversely, there are a multitude of examples that subscribe to the late great Jack Gibson’s adage of “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it”. That could well have been applied to the “neutering of the scrum” or as some Neanderthals would have you believe the “abolition of the biff”.

However, one thing really sticks in my craw as the debate about "rorting" and salaries takes precedence over the game itself. My gripe can be summarised by the question: “Who should run our game?”

How many of you can remember your first contact with your league club? I believe I’m safe in suggesting that it went something like this…

Somebody, perhaps in your family or a friend, suggested [read dared or bribed here] that you come down to play [read watch or accompany somebody here] footy for the local club.

When you arrived you were scrutinised by the powers-that-be and eventually asked to join. If you were a player [read supporter or hanger-on here] then you quickly learnt your place. There was a pecking order. The club had:

- a president (someone everybody talked about often disparagingly),
- a committee (generally treated with awe),
- some volunteers (mostly related to a player),
- a sponsor (a person who never understood why team songs were always so course),
- some legends (superheroes whose feats were celebrated regularly at the clubhouse [read bbq or presentation night here]),
- some fixtures (very old people who got into games for free although nobody could remember why),
- a coach (spoken about in hushed tones),
- a team captain (always sat in the middle of the team photo with a humble expression),
- a trainer (never mentioned in case he required an extra lap),
- a water-boy (the clubs dogs-body and font of information),
- some parents (generally of the team captain [read wannabe coaches here]), and
- a plethora of players who straggled in from all walks of life.

This hierarchy functioned because it was the fabric of every club, in every town, in every state, in every country that played rugby league. Put your own faces to the above.

But that is not all. There were the supernatural beings. Those mystical God-like figures who are mentioned only at club meetings as their secret edicts are handed down from some seemingly imaginary land where they pontificate over all things rugby league.

I am referring to the local league [read QRL, CRL, NSWRL, ARL, NRL here]… that sanctimonious collective that held the sway over every important facet of the game and who spoke of things that we mere mortals could only dream about. They were responsible for such lofty ministrations as the judiciary, selectors, referees, the media, the competition, the biggest trophies and the annual general meeting.

Complex yes but functional? Also yes. In the majority of cases this structure is still in existence in most of the near and far flung corners of the rugby league world, serving their communities. So what’s my point?

Never in any organisation that I have worked for, or played for, have the employees, or the players, run the show. Sure, their opinions are heard and often acted upon. However, those who are disgruntled are soon sorted out, either by management or by their own choice or by that great leveller… natural selection. It’s a win/win situation… we don’t need them and they don’t need us.

Some may argue that this system is antiquated and doesn’t suit 2010. They may argue that player power is a reality and must be heeded or otherwise rugby league falls over. They may quote player drain, fans’ disinterest and diminishing sponsorships, particularly from the all-devouring electronic media. They may demand outrageously inflated salaries and the wider acceptance of some players’ ludicrous antics when out “socialising”.

They are wrong. Things may change. An independent committee may be appointed but there must always be a boss. If not we have anarchy.
__________________________________________________________________

 

[byrne_rovelli_fan82]

byrne_rovelli_fan82 for the Bunnies:

~~

P.A.Y.E

In the fallout of the Melbourne Storm’s salary cap drama from a few weeks ago questions have been raised in regards to the salary being paid to NRL players. There are those players earning a fairly modest yearly wage for their rugby league career, though modest to many of us for them it’s still a lot more than the every-day job the could be doing. Then, there are those players considered to be elite players in the game earning a much large sum of money.

The question begs: Are the elite players really worth the amount of money they are getting paid?

Players like Steve Price, Brent Tate, Billy Slater Cameron Smith, Greg Inglis, Matt Cooper, Darren Lockyer, Isreal Folau, Jarred Hayne, Eric Grothe Jnr are just a small handful of elite players in the NRL, with a lot of NRL experience behind them as well as having the honour of representing their country and their state at the highest level.

All players need to be put on a level playing field in terms of their on-field performance. Start them on something small and over time if they prove they are good enough then can both parties can negotiate the salary and move it up from there. However tis should only be based on performances week-in and week out. How good they become in the future playing for their country, winning a world cup and playing for their state shouldn’t even enter the equation.

In the modern era it is too easy for these players to demand what they want just because they can, and by giving them the power they can then dictate how they perform.

Greg Inglis is one prime example of this mind-set. It is hard to go against his brilliance as a footballer from the moment he burst onto the field and impressed everyone. Since his first year though he hasn’t been the same. Too often we see him float between playing one excellent breath-taking game to playing the next few games in poor fashion. It is as though because he knows how good he is he can pick his moments of when he wants to play like a guy with passion.

Well that simply is not good enough. The fans and the club deserve more. If he wants the praise then he needs to earn his keep. Against the Broncos he was poor then against the Raiders he was brilliant. On that one brilliant game he’s suddenly in everyone’s good books as though the Broncos game didn’t exist. The thinking seems to be:

‘Oh yeah I played crap last week let’s play great this time so everyone will forget about the crap one’.

On games like that is he worth being paid as much as $400k or even more?

Short answer: No.

If he wants that money he needs to be paid to earn it and prove he can be the player the club wants.
It’s not to say players can’t have off days, that is only natural but they shouldn’t fall into the thinking of doing it whenever they want to but it seems to be a regular occurrence in our game.
These elite players have nothing that separates them from the players on lesser salaries the only glaring difference comes down to experience and possible representative honours and even that is a petty comparison.

Compare Inglis to fellow Storm teammate Billy Slater. He too is a rep player but the big difference between them is Billy is performing and doing it consistently, it is very rare for him to have a poor game and if so it’ll be one everyone has at some point. Slater though appears to earn his keep and if anything proves he is one worth his pay check.

Eric Grothe Jnr is similar to Inglis in many ways, with so much hype but not delivering enough, only doing it when he wants to, which proves his ego is bigger than anything else. Fellow Eel Jarred Hayne is also in the same category though he’s fixed up a few areas in his game since.
Players need to be re-assessed for their salaries, have them weeded down to performance base games and work their way up from there. This time though the control must be with the club they determine how much the pay rise can go, and if player x wants to argue the point well they should walk the walk before talking the talk.
~~
749 words between '~' according to official word counter

 

[Big Pete]

Big Pete for the Gold Coast Titans (749 OWC) flies onto the ball for his first run at his new home.
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​

​

[FONT=&quot]
The Tale of a Tiny Titan
[/FONT]
[FONT=&quot]As a Rugby League fan, I have paid witness to some of the most talented players of the modern era. From the Andrew Johns' era through to Jarryd Hayne's, I have witnessed any number of spectacular feats on the rugby league field and even a few career-defining performances that have changed history in an instant. However, in all my time as a supporter, I am yet to see a player of such distinction as Preston Campbell. In a time when Rugby League has become increasingly more clinical and one-dimensional, Campbell continues to distinguish himself from the herd, and in doing so has caught the hearts of fans all around Australia.

Normally when writing a report, one would structure it in such a way that it almost reads like an in-depth timeline. However, with Preston, such a report would not do him justice. He’s an enigma, a model of individuality and in celebration of his skills this report will seek to highlight why Campbell has reached such prominence in the hearts of many, underlining why people speak of him so highly.

The first instance is barely a month old.

It was a cold and dreary night at one of Rugby League’s most feared stadiums, Brookvale Oval, as Preston and his men faced a red-hot Manly Sea Eagles outfit boasting eight international players. In the past, Brookvale had played host to a number of Titans thrashings including a debilitating 38-4 loss in the lead up to the Titans maiden finals appearance in 2009.

When the game started with an Anthony Watmough bust, the record didn’t look under threat as the Sea Eagles raced to a three tries to one lead in the space of thirty minutes. They could’ve been up by more had it not been for some desperate Titans defence and the presence of Preston. In one instance, just before halftime, the Sea Eagles placed a daring grubber inside the Titans 20m zone that ricocheted onto open pasture. Sensing his team needed him, Preston swooped on the ball and jinked down field before off-loading the ball to the lightening quick Kevin Gordon who’s try clawed the Titans back to an unlikely four-point deficit leading into half time.

Fast-forwarding 27 minutes into the second half and the Titans again found themselves down by ten, following a Steve Matai try. Tenacious Titan, Nathan Friend received the ball on the fifth play and daringly ran it up the centre of the park. The mercurial Preston bobbed-up out of nowhere in time to receive a miracle pass before spearing towards the line at full pelt and scoring adjacent the goal posts.

And just like that the Titans had put themselves back in the game. With the deficit back to four points, the Titans marched their way down to the Sea Eagles’ try-line. It was still relatively early in the set when Nathan Friend launched a well-worked ruck play with second-row Anthony Laffranchi who obliged by crashing over to draw level. However such a score-line would never satisfy the Tiny Titan as he prepared his conversion close to the eastern touchline. His teams’ fate was in his hands, it was he who would determine whether the Titans would conjure a victory or brave the torment of the Golden Point. Such a situation would visibly affect most players but if Preston had any nervousness, he was not showing it. He sauntered back, casually lined-up the ball and belted the bludger inside the goal posts, handing the Titans the most unlikely of victories, 24-22.

One moment that I feel deserves particular mention was not a successful one for the Titans but certainly one that defined Preston Campbell.

It was during a Friday night blockbuster at Suncorp Stadium against traditional rivals the Brisbane Broncos and part-way through the second half when Preston scooped up a skidding long-range kick. He then beat a tackler before running in between several defenders and scampering out of tackles steeled by sheer determination. The incredible part? He did all this with a broken rib.

It’s almost a crime that little is made of such an extraordinarily courageous player, especially in a time when robotic rehearsed drills are celebrated in both Queensland and New South Wales. Nowadays, when fans look for inspiration, they more often than not overlook Campbell and his prodigious talent. He may never pull on the Sky Blue, but the tiny Titan with the gigantic heart should be remembered as a New South Wales legend.[/FONT]

 

[griffo346]

griffo346 for the rabbits

My all time State of Origin team


In this article I will discuss the best ever state of origin side with a mixture of both New South Wales and Queensland by selecting players from each position cumulating into the best ever team overall if they where to play for the same state.

Fullback

Queensland

Robbie O’Davis

This was a hard decision with also having the choice of Darren Lockyer, I lent towards the choice of Robbie as I he was a safe fullback and pretty consistent also I don’t think I could of picked Darren in both positions of five – eighth and fullback..

Wingers

Queensland

Matt Sing

Matt Sing was a really good footballer in the late 90’s when he moved to the roosters from the panthers his talent was noticed more so as he went on to play 17 games for Queensland.

New South Wales

Rod Wishart

In the 90’s Rod was a dynamic winger in attack and defense either for his club the Steelers or New South Wales.

Centres

Queensland

Mal Meninga

Massive in stature Mal was a unit on all front with his massive hits in attack by palming off players, also was a pretty tough defender. Mal has more recently moved on to coaching his beloved Maroons having currently achieved 4 series victories in a row.

New South Wales

Michael O’Connor

Played 19 games for the blues spanning over 6 years he is more remembered for that goal kick to take the win game 2 in the 1991 series when he kicked a goal after the siren in pouring rain.


Five-eighth

New South Wales

Brad Fittler

Brad went onto play 31 State of origin games one of the best ball runners in the game had a great kicking game also was pretty solid in defense.

Half Back

New South Wales

Andrew Johns

In the panicle of his career Joey was the most successful New South Wales halfback although I cant compare his to his previous compatriots he was a great ball runner and formed a formidable partnership with Brad Fittler

Front Row

Queensland

Shane Webcke

Shane was an outstanding front rower and has extremely good mobility from his size and along with his front row partner they formed a combination that laid several platforms for there respective halves combinations.

Petero Civoniceva

His name pretty much says it all along with the player above they just got down to the business and has set Queensland a few platforms for victories.

Hooker

Queensland

Cameron Smith

I can’t say much about Cameron as he is extraordinary the best hooker to pull on a Queensland jumper has a pretty good passing game and also a pretty decent kicking game.

Second Row

Queensland

Garry Larson

Garry had massive emotional passion for the Queensland jumper and it was shown in everything he did as a representative player for the Maroons.

New South Wales

Nathan Hindmarsh

Hindy as he is known has one of the best defense abilities in the modern game and was unlucky in my opinion to miss out on this current side that is playing now as the current blues squad doesn’t have much passion for the jumper

Lock Forward

Queensland
Billy Moore

Moore was a regular selection for the maroon jersey for three seasons and notably shouted 'Queenslander! Queenslander!' to motivate an underdog Maroons team on their way out of the tunnel in 1995.

Interchange

Queensland

Steve Price

Steve is one of the games premier forwards and I believe in this team he would have massive impact coming off the bench.

Trevor Gillmeister

The axe as he is know was chosen in my team more so for impact then anything he had brutal defense and a decent offload to trouble most teams lines as he would run to the line and pop the offload to support players.

New South Wales

Steve Menzies

Steve is similar to wing as he can cover some positions like the back row and centre pretty solid defender went on to represent the blues on 20 occasions.

Craig Wing

Craig offered a fair bit when the interchange rule was changed to a limited amount as his utility role became more noticeable in the back end of each half when the forwards were tiring he went onto make 15 appearances for the blues.
Coach

Wayne Bennett

His name says it all really with a record like his I wouldn’t look past anyone else really.

References
http://www.rugbyleagueproject.org


738 words inc title

 

[TITs ANonymouS]

TITs ANonymous runs onto the field filled with joy after the display of the Queenslanders last night. 749 OWC between the lines.

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To Be or Not To Be?

The ultimate question, is it not? To be what? A rooster? A car? A super hero? No - rather, to be or not to be a Rugby League player?

For me, that’s easy. Of course I want to partake in the greatest game of all. Those reading this article are obviously avid league fans with a burning desire to see the game appreciated as it should be.

So why wouldn’t I want to be one? To begin with, maybe I want to be a union player or an Arial Fairy Leaper?. Jeeper’s creepers, maybe I even want to play in the NFL! Sacrilege! Burn them at the stake! Release the dogs!

So before we embark upon a path of unbridled vengeance against such traitorous scum lets look into WHY someone might no longer want to be a rugby league player.

This is easy. It boils down to the “Jerry Maguire Syndrome” or its more common name of “Show Me the Money”! Money, the root of all evil, well according to the religious pundits in the world, that is.

So we have two sides to this argument of players following the money instead of following the code they have played since childhood.

Tommy Raudonikis argued vehemently during the week against Israel Falou being selected for the Queensland team, given the strong likelihood that Falou will be leaving our sacred code at the conclusion of this season. According to Tommy, only those who hold true to the rugby league code of honour (as he sees it), should be given the ultimate honour of representative football.

I love ole Tommy, he doesn’t call a spade a spade, he calls it a (explanative) shovel! A true from the hip shooter, had Tommy been born in America back in the good ole days, his name would have been synonymous with Wyatt Earp, Billy the Kid and Jesse James.
Of course players should show some loyalty to the sporting code that not only provided them with enjoyment for so many years, but also bought them fame and some fortune along the way. Giving back to the game as much or more than it has given you is a rewarding feeling and many sportsman and women have done this in many codes, in many countries in the past. Hopefully they will continue to do so in the future.
At the end of the day though, this is their job. This it the livelihood that puts the bread and butter on the table for them and their families. Do we cast the same judgements on people with more traditional jobs who may work for many years with a company, receive advancements and specialised training and then, when offered another job with far greater financial rewards, jump ship? I think not.

Whilst I am not privy to the amounts of extra money on offer for the likes of Falou, according to the news media, it’s a substantial amount. These athletes, for the most part, are extremely loyal to their respective codes, but they have a higher responsibility to themselves and their families. They are not changing horses mid career for chicken feed, its big bucks, and I, for one, don’t blame them.

What needs to be addressed is how to make it financially rewarding for these guys to stay with their original code. The suggestion that the salary cap is at fault is a flawed train of thought. Yes, it does restrict the earning capacity of the players, but it is the best system that promotes a level playing field for all the teams and, more importantly, prevents spiralling salaries that send clubs to the wall financially.

The answer is already being looked at by the NRL and I think it’s the best option. The players being head hunted are obviously the best in their field and often represent their state and country. Here the NRL can step in and make those representative games extremely financially rewarding for the players. The money can be dolled out by the NRL from its vast sources of revenue. This would remove any undue, additional burden placed on the usually cash-strapped clubs.

So the real question is not “to be or not to be”, but why has it taken so long for the NRL big wigs to recognise the danger the code faces and find and implement a solution? (Not as succinct or easy to remember, I know!) But isn’t that what they are paid handsomely for?

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[tits&tans]

tits&tans for the Titans stomps on the pitch, making sure he flattens all the molehills.

747 words between the stars (OWC)

*****

Socialphobia

​

It’s the day before the big event and you need to prepare. You need your rest and you need to sleep. The next day will define yourself, your team, your career and your life. It’s not a small day.

How many of you have lain in bed on the eve of a crucial match and tried to predict what would happen if … ?

As much as we like to imagine the possibility of winning and of outperforming our coach’s and teammates’ expectations, the chance of seriously f**king up often eclipses such positive thoughts. We envisage all those nightmare scenarios in which we make a huge mistake, in which we embarrass ourselves, or in which we lose the game for our team.

Why is that? Why are our best thoughts so often overshadowed in such a way? A prerequisite for survival (hope for the best, plan for the worst?)? The negative influence of modern societal norms? Whatever the reason, this is a topic for another day and another article, methinks.

However, there is a small group amongst us that takes this pre-match worry and unintentionally converts it to a physical response. There are many names for this type of extreme reaction: performance anxiety, social anxiety (disorder), socialphobia, stage-fright or anticipatory anxiety. It is defined as “a marked and persistent fear of social or performance situations in which embarrassment may occur.”

Many people can get self-conscious on occasion, but socialphobia is more than just shyness or occasional nerves. Your fear of embarrassing yourself is so intense that you go to great lengths to avoid situations in which you’ll be watched or evaluated by others. I would imagine that the opening game of SOO ‘10 at the ANZ Stadium in front of 80,000 scrutinizing fans would trigger such feelings!

How such intense feelings of worry affect us depends on the individual and his or her success in dealing with or blocking them. One of my former teammates used to go through an intense rush of physical responses before an important game which included dry-wretching, leg-spasms and sudden temperature changes.

These may manifest themselves in a number of physical ways:

• a mysterious cramp before or during the game;
• shortness of breath when running out on to the field;
• a tightening of muscles sending passes wayward and dropkicks into the stands;
• fumbled catches through a miscalculation of trajectory.

Our in-built survival instinct gives us, in general, three options when faced with something that may cause anxiety:

• If it looks weaker than me, I’ll fight it.
• If it looks stronger (but slower) than me, I’ll flee.
• If it looks stronger and faster than me, I’ll freeze and hope it can’t see.

In the case of most NRL players, the immediate reaction would be option 1 (unless you are a NSWder). I would like, for the sake of completion, add three more possible options that would only apply to a select few in the NRL world:

• If it looks better than me, I’ll f*** it.
• If it happened whilst intoxicated, I’ll forget it.
• It is comes in a bottle, I’ll fuddle it.

Scouring academic reference material and self-help books, I have found a plethora of methods to deal with this “debilitating ailment”. However, upon closer inspection, these strategies don’t seen particular useful. I would like to briefly mention a few such ideas, followed by my own personal opinion.

Thought-stopping: You snap a rubber band against your wrist when you have an anxious thought. Come on! The more you tell yourself not to think of something, the more you’ll think about it.

Eat bananas: Nature’s beta-blockers, which block the body’s response to adrenaline. What this particular physician fails to realize is that adrenaline is essential for dealing with anxiety-stimulating situations.

Use tranquilizers: Would be tricky when about to exert yourself. Although would make some matches pretty funny.

Breathe: Damn, I knew there was a reason why I was getting anxious, I wasn’t breathing!

Reattribute your arousal: Something that seems to happen way too much in modern NRL already.

Hypnotherapy: I’ve seen what they make hypnotised people do on the telly – no way!

Self-centredness: Remind yourself that they're not here to see or hear you, unless you're a very famous person. Well, … actually … they kinda are.
​

With respect to all those who may suffer from socialphobia, I think perhaps the best advice to be given is what my former teammates’ dad used to shout from the sidelines: “Suck it up, and get stuck in.”

********
References:
Clarke, E., Davidson, J.W., Windsor, W.L., & Pitts, S. (2000) Distance Learning Module: The Psychology of Performance
Hayes, N. (1999) Teach Yourself Psychology
www.eugenetherapy.com/Treatment of Social Anxiety with CBT.doc

 

[Amadean]

Amadean does the helicopter, stunning a nearby mullet, whilst badly mouthing the words to the French national anthem. For the Titans: 691 below the bars.

****************************



Masochism and Machismo are different things.

“Doctor, Doctor…. it hurts when I hit my head against this brick wall.”
“Well, stop doing it.”


Not a very good joke. Certainly not a new joke. Not a joke you would re-tell. Possibly not a joke you would admit to having laughed at in the past. Absolutely the funniest statement ever uttered by a person, according to my 7-year old cousin.

No, I doubt I’ve acquainted you with any new knowledge, yet. Most sober, non-masochistic folk would agree that the best way to stop self-inflicted pain is to stop inflicting it upon yourself. Those masochists among you would agree the best way to stop pain is with a safety-word, duct-tape, a fresh lemon and a movie of your parents as children, you sick buggers. Get help.

No, not even if I had published the above humourous epistle in the Sydney Morning Herald would I have found a single reader who was surprised by the punchline. Not even those members of society who read their newspaper whilst self-flagellating with birch twigs (you crazy, sexy Fins you) would raise an eyebrow over their morning depression-and-vodka cocktail.

Yet, on Tuesday those same NewSouthWelsh newspapers abounded with confident predictions of victory. On Thursday, the back pages were litanies of faint praise for Queensland and comforting rubbish for their cockroach team. “It hurts…”

“Stop doing it”

Now really bluepondscum, it isn’t complicated. Have Kimmorley or Gidley ever looked like winning a series off their own brilliance? No? They have not? Well, stop picking them.

It is neither difficult nor time-consuming, dear roachcock selectors. Back away from the mirror, put down the razor, press pause on the remote control – freezing the action of your Auntie Sarah’s downy moustache being licked by ice-cream lips, get the Bulldogs on the phone and tell them they can shove their septuagenarian halfback up where the sun don’t shine. Then, call Campese’s mum, or anybody else's mum for that matter, and ask if her little boy can come out and play Wednesday three weeks from now.

It beggars belief, it really does. Yet disbelief has an answer, finding hints and hues of a conspiracy to lead the almost-mighty Bleus down a path of stagnation. Incompetence of this magnitude cannot be coincidence. For they are many and various, those who dreams of S-S-SouthWhales’ eternal downfall. Various, and powerful.

I am of course not referring to Queenslanders who, as science has proven, are 94.3% godliness by volume. We blessed people need no skulduggery to force our lowly, lowly opponents into the mud.

No, NsouthWail’s enemies, warped and twisted, lie within in between the borders of Queensland and Mexico. Amidst dank fens of sorrow they lurk, their mournful presence only betrayed by the hiss of blackened spittle between their lips as they morbidly mouth their own pathos. Wallowing in the ebon swill of their own denigration, these scum-filled bile-balloons feed on the worst of human emotions, creating an entire society of twisted caricatures of decency.

Who are they, these Gog and Magog of embodied pity? Why, none other than the Neu Psouf Whelsh folk themselves. You fans of Les Bleus, you are entirely responsible for the performances of your team: celebrate your achievements. Your tall-poppy bitchiness, your envious rumours, your insistence on conformity… you have thrown rotted rushes across your bestial bower, now slumber away in deserved peace.

‘Oh noes!’ It seems such peace is not to be had. No, these roachcocking fans would rather trample their cake underfoot and eat someone else’ too! Ah, well. That they haven’t grasped cause-and-effect (mock players, select morons based on bad journalism, mock players, mock coaches, select morons based on bad journalism, complain about losing) is pitiable. That they still search for excuses is, perhaps, slightly, almost, a little non-despicable.

Were it not for the fact that they seem to enjoy the pain of losing, these BaloooSuffWeels fans would be almost comprehensible. Instead, we’re left with the sickening knowledge that, to them, Wednesday night was as much fun as you can have without a sharp knife and someone else’s urine.

Dear Masochists of New South Wales,

Get help.

Love,

Queensland.

 

[byrne_rovelli_fan82]

Interchange for Bunnies: miccle off
rabs on

 

[Marshall_magic]

Marshall Magic dives over to give the bunnies a late chance.

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Nice Car, Now Where are the Keys?​

Over the past 5 weeks, I have watched my beloved Wests Tigers go from one of the most entertaining and exciting attacking football teams in the comp, to pathetically inept and borderline embarrassing. Those excellent tries they would put on through slick and entertaining backline play all but dried up, and going through games barely putting double figures on the scoreboard. When something like this happens, you just stop and ask yourself, why? How does it all turn pear shaped, seemingly overnight? The key elements are still there, Marshall, Farah, Lote, Lawrence, but the points won’t come.

Then it hit me. We have not got a halfback who can release them. A halfback who can mix it up enough to be threatening with the ball, as well as create chances for those around him. We had one by the name of Tim Moltzen for the first month of the competition, and when he wore the number seven jersey, we were unbeatable. In fact, every game he has been in the seven, we’ve won, including a long streak in 2009 and a short one at the start of 2010. However, he’s gone now, injured for the year in a freakish incident.

The way I began to see it with him gone, was waking up with a Porsche in the driveway, but without the keys. Yeah, sure, it still looks good to have there, it’s still an incredibly fast, attractive and powerful car, but what’s the point in having it if you can’t drive it anywhere? Just like the Tigers. We have tremendous strike power in our backline. We can put 40 points on strong defensive units, but we don’t have the key to unleash that power without Moltzen in the side.

Friday night in Newcastle may have been a little different, in winning with Lui at halfback, but, there was a lot of other factors contributing to the win, including the ineptness of the Knights, some strong performances by our forwards, and of course, a good performance by Robert Lui. However, there are still big question marks over Lui’s head. Can he lead us to a top eight finish? Can he consistently put on good performances? Can he mix it up enough to be a threat with the ball in hand?

In our long run of missing the top 8 (which gets harder and harder to take every year), this on paper is probably the best squad we’ve had, in terms of attack and defence. In fact, I would say it’s the best squad we’ve had any season we’ve been in the NRL (on paper obviously, we fall well short of the 2005 crew when it comes to heart, determination and passion) yet we’re stuck without a consistent yet skilful halfback. On our day we will beat, even thrash, any team in the competition, we just have that flare about us, but on other days we will make an average side look a million bucks (case in point, Round 10 vs Souths at the SCG).

So, the mighty tigers have got this wonderful backline, outside a questionable 7 (who could well do the job for us this season, and I bet everyone from Campbelltown to Leichhardt is praying that he does), behind a top forward pack. The 7 is wedged between two of the best players in the game today, although the form of one of them (Farah) is below the standard we’ve come to expect from him). Based on that statement alone, the Tigers should walk into the top 8, and push for a top 4 birth, but based on what we’ve been seeing, they could well cruise along outside the top 8, struggling to string wins together, and push for a bottom 4 finish.

Just a side note, do I think Tim Moltzen is the best halfback in the NRL? No, I probably wouldn’t rate him in the top 8 halfbacks in the NRL. However, the Tigers do not play a conventional style of football. Farah is not your usual hooker, Marshall not your usual 5/8, and the game plans are not from any textbook. However, when it comes to doing the job you have to do to get your side over the line, Moltzen is very good at it. His job is to link together all the individual elements of our team and to get them to run, like car keys, but these keys have been lost.


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747 words

 

[madunit]

Pens down!

 

[Titanic]

5v3 sadly tells it all. Good effort team to scramble home after last nights' festivities.

Bunnies, we apologise for the chaos that is the Robina traffic... see you next time.

Over to you Antonius.

Thanks 'Unit... lovely clock.

 

[antonius]

Titans

Titanic
Anarchy
733 Words
A piece on the structure of clubs, and the game. Who runs it, who’s in charge if you like?
The writer explains why there always has to be a boss.
Score 85

Big Pete
The Tale of a Tiny Titan
749 Words
How good is Preston Campbell? This piece attempts to explain why the writer sees him as an enigma of the game. The writer uses a couple of moments in games to do this. The subject really needs more than 750 words.
Score 83

TITs Anonymous
To Be or Not To Be?
749 Words
Players leaving the game for more money.
In this piece the writer puts forward the argument that players selected to play representative games should receive higher payments for those games in order to supplement their income. Well written.
Score 86

tits&tans
Socialphobia
747 Words
How many of us have suffered this? The fear of stuffing up and how to cope. (not sure about some of the suggestions)
Score 86

Amadean
Masochism and Machismo are different things.
691 Words
Somewhere in amongst the 691 words of this piece I think the writer was telling us that NSW selectors are various forms of life who enjoy losing. The second last paragraph seems to have gone astray a little? I found this hard reading.
Score 75



Rabbits

byrne_rovelli_fan82
P.A.Y.E.
749 Words
The writer suggests a structure by which players should be paid. I won’t delve into the proposal he puts forward.
The piece is poorly written, poor spelling, and long sentences make for difficult reading. The errors are minor. 10 minutes spent proof reading, would make the piece so much more readable and thus produce a higher score.
Score 60


griffo346
My all time State of Origin team
738 Words
The writer gives us a list of his best-combined State of Origin players to make up his all time best team.
Let me start by saying again that teams need to proof read each other’s articles. This piece is littered with poor spelling and poor grammar. Writers are only going to improve if they get some help from their teammates. The articles subject is fairly basic.
Score 55

Marshall Magic
Nice Car, Now Where are the Keys?
747 Words
Good reading. Why have the Tigers faltered in a season that started so promisingly? The writer looks at the effect that Moltzens injury has had on the Tigers performances since his departure. Simple, but nicely constructed, and readable.
Score 86

Result
Titans 415 defeated Souths 201

POTM
TITs Anonymous, tits&tans, Marshall Magic.

As pointed out in the scoring, it pays to have your teammates read through each other’s articles, some of the errors are basic and easily fixed if a little more time is taken before posting.

 

[madunit]

while taking nothing away from the great work of the Titans writers, I think it was the work of my clock which got them over the line ;-)

 

[Titanic]

Thanks all & sundry for the comments and general camaraderie. Onward, Titans onward. Enjoy the bye this week.

Antonius, it has been mentioned that your new persona should be Quick Draw.

What do you call a clock wearing sunglasses? A cuckoo clock.... boom boom.