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Western Pasifika Bid News

AlwaysGreen

Immortal
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48,294
The Western Pasifika Porcupines are pleased to announce the milestone of our 4 billionth member!
Kim Yo Jong became Porcupines member #4000000000 when she signed on at the Porcupines CoE in Pyongyang on Tuesday. Ms. Kim said: 'I am happy to be member of club that will destroy all other dullards'.

Spines up!!!!!!
 
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14,461
The Western Pasifika Porcupines are pleased to announce the milestone of our 4 billionth member!
Kim Yo Jong became Porcupines member #4000000000 when she signed on at the Porcupines CoE in Pyongyang on Tuesday. Ms. Kim said: 'I am happy to be member of club that will destroy all other dullards'.

Spines up!!!!!!
And what is the exact quota of vegans in the membership tally??
 

MugaB

Coach
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12,747
And what is the exact quota of vegans in the membership tally??
Zero, there was a trial match between the porcupines and the hunters, after the arduous match ended up in a tough well fought draw 16-16
They then shook hands and proceeded to eat the crowd.... vegans were the first to go, they were limp, and very slow willed and simply not fast enough to get away from the very agile and athletic 34 men (and 2 subs= 18th men, incase of concussions of course) vegans realy need to start eating proper red meat, you never know when Darwinism might kick in
 

AlwaysGreen

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48,294
Massive news for the Western Pasifika Porcupines. At our AGM it was decided that the glamour club will merge with the South Queensland Crushers to secure the 18th NRL licence. It was also decided to google AGM to see what the hell it meant.

SQ Crushers El Presidente Garrick Morgan presented the Crushers 27 non negotiables to the Porcupines board of directors, none of which was agreed to.

The South Western Crushed Porcupines will wear Aztec gold and Byzantium yellow and play 7 home games at historic North Sydney oval.

Spines crushed!!!!!
 

AlwaysGreen

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48,294
Western Pasifika Porcupines and the Federal Governments of Laos, Palau and Niger have worked together to provide a pathway for dole bludgers to work at our organisation. For minimum wage these stains on society will be given jobs such as corner posts, ground signage, urinals or wingers to get off welfare and contribute to society.

Applications can be sent to our welfare officer Dr Albert Speer:
Getajobbludger@spinescam.net.au


Spines up!!!!!
 

AlwaysGreen

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48,294
The Western Pasifika Porcupines wish to announce their new board of directors:

images-3.jpeg
This diverse group includes 4 golfers and in a first for the glamour club a squash player!

Spines up!!!!
 

AlwaysGreen

Immortal
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48,294
Great news for Western Pasifika Porcupines as club CEO Col'n Carpenter announced new pathways at the club.

"WPP is proud to announce an arrangement with French glamour club Pia Donkeys. All young Western Pasifika Porcupines players will have the opportunity to play for the Donkeys with 3 year scholarships of up to €12 and a bag of onions for our 37 most promising players".
In another coup for the Porcupines, a arrangement with English team Hull KR was also announced:
"12 players a year will be offered a chance to get out of abject poverty and depressing environment to play for the Porcupines' feeder club Kabul Krunchers. It's hoped the lads and lasses from Hull will be able to turn their lives around in a less hostile, and more hopeful environment."

Spines up!!!!!
 

AlwaysGreen

Immortal
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48,294
More massive news for the Western Pasifika Porcupines!
As part of our push into Asia we are pleased to announce that former rugby strongholds Cambodia, Laos and Burma have converted to rugby league and sworn subordinance to the Western Pasifika Porcupines.
WPP director of footy operations in Asia Mick Wong:
"The conversion of union to league is almost complete with all 27 billion former Asian union players now in the Porcupines pathways system. Only China's 97 billion union players remain before we achieve complete domination in Asia".

Spines up!!!!!!
 

MugaB

Coach
Messages
12,747
More massive news for the Western Pasifika Porcupines!
As part of our push into Asia we are pleased to announce that former rugby strongholds Cambodia, Laos and Burma have converted to rugby league and sworn subordinance to the Western Pasifika Porcupines.
WPP director of footy operations in Asia Mick Wong:
"The conversion of union to league is almost complete with all 27 billion former Asian union players now in the Porcupines pathways system. Only China's 97 billion union players remain before we achieve complete domination in Asia".

Spines up!!!!!!
Apparently talmololo and fisher-harris have signed on to the porcupines as starting props after there respective current contracts are completed, should the licence go to Western Pasifika this coming expansion, have even got a famous mega rich Hollywood celebrity involved, they will all be present next las vegas opener
 

AlwaysGreen

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48,294
Rumours continue to swirl around the 18th NRL licence:
The Bears will be back playing 27 games @ historic North Sydney Oval in a joint venture with the Waverley Bowling club mixed fours.
The Brisbane Bagels will be team 18 with Joe Bjelke Peterson as captain-coach.
Perth Pelicans have secured the 18th licence thanks to their 16 million trillion dollars investors and playing pool of 97 billion juniors.
Anthony Albanese has ceded north Queensland to PNG therefore allowing the Port Moresby Poppers to claim the 18th licence.
The IKEA Ibises have been granted the 18th licence as confirmed by their meatball chefs.
NZ II: This time its Personal have been granted the 18th licence and will play out of Hobbiton International Stadium.

All of these rumours are totally bunkum as Lord Peter V'landys faxed Western Pasifika Porcupines CEO Max Headroom the 18th licence last night.


Spines up!!!!!!!!!
 

MugaB

Coach
Messages
12,747
News today that the western pacifica bid is now going to hedge its bets and become both the NRLs 18th team AND become AFLs 20th team,
theyve thought long and hard about it, and realised they need to capture both markets to ensure that "OUR BRAND BECOMES UNIVERSALLY CONSUMED"
and that any fanday buses that are travelling around in china are found, no matter the code they would be supporting, and thus we can cater for both the people of Perth and Western Pacifika at the same time, just as the Dolphins has captured the imagination of Greater Brisbane/Queensland, we can capture the rest.
The colors will remain the same for both codes, to ensure stability and marketing brand awareness, there are also thoughts of aquiring or starting up a netball team also, but that wont happen till the new stadium build on rottnest island has the proper facilities to cater for the women, thus pushing out the NRLW amd AFLW squads till then also....
Spines UUUUUUP!!!!!
Yours truly MAX HEADROOM
 
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AlwaysGreen

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48,294
Vale Warriors.

Sad news out of New Zealand as the Vodafone Warriors announced they were giving up their NRL licence due to losing a few games.

After punching out Greg Florimo of rival bid The Everywhere Bears, Western Pasifika Porcupines CEO Vivian Vulture said: "We are ready to take the Vodafone Warriors license, territory and sponsors as well as all the players' women. The Siemens Western Pasifika Porcupines have the resources to be a powerhouse in the NRL and we are easily able to hold the 18th NRL licence as well as the Warriors licence."


Spines up!!!!!!
 

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