1st Chappell/Hadlee Trophy Match AUS v NZ @ WACA

[beads6]

Quick everyone lay the boot into Johnson while you have the chance...

 

[shiznit]

A Kiwi walks into the local unemployment office, marches straight up to the counter and says, "Hi! I hate being on welfare, I'd really rather have a job."

The clerk behind the Centrelink desk says, "Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur/bodyguard for his nymphomaniac daughter. You'll have to drive around in his Mercedes, but he'll supply all of your clothes.

Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll be expected to escort her on her overseas holiday trips. You'll have a two-bedroom apartment above the garage.

The starting salary is $200,000 a year".

The Kiwi says, "You're bullsh*tting me!"

The Centrelink officer says, "Yeah, well, you started it".

WTF??? NZ's unemployment rate has consistently been the lowest in the OECD... i know... i work in policy for MSD in NZ.

we have centrelink officials coming over to us all the time getting ideas how to lower your guys rate...

 

[attila_the_gorilla]

Couldn't do any worse than Fulton today.

They`re both pretty woeful as far as I`m concerned, in limited overs. But maybe Flynn does have the edge over Fulton.

 

[beads6]

Easiest way to lower the Aussie unemployment rate is to send all the dumb kiwis back where they came from...

 

[African Monkey]

Easiest way to lower the Aussie unemployment rate is to send all the dumb kiwis back where they came from...

Nah you can have them.

 

[attila_the_gorilla]

Elliot is looking pretty solid, though I think a bit of pace can probably shake him up.

 

[beads6]

They are playing Tait like he is under arming it to them. This is the time where we need to introduce a decent spinner

 

[El Diablo]

A Kiwi walks into the local unemployment office, marches straight up to the counter and says, "Hi! I hate being on welfare, I'd really rather have a job."

The clerk behind the Centrelink desk says, "Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur/bodyguard for his nymphomaniac daughter. You'll have to drive around in his Mercedes, but he'll supply all of your clothes.

Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll be expected to escort her on her overseas holiday trips. You'll have a two-bedroom apartment above the garage.

The starting salary is $200,000 a year".

The Kiwi says, "You're bullsh*tting me!"

The Centrelink officer says, "Yeah, well, you started it".

i posted this some time back, but its not bad

A Kiwi walks into his bedroom with a sheep under his arm and says:

"Darling, this is the pig I have sex with when you have a headache."

His girlfriend is lying in bed and replies:

"I think you'll find that's a sheep, you idiot."

The man says:

"I think you'll find I wasn't talking to you."

 

[hineyrulz]

They are playing Tait like he is under arming it to them. This is the time where we need to introduce a decent spinner

And where do we find him????

 

[shiznit]

Easiest way to lower the Aussie unemployment rate is to send all the dumb kiwis back where they came from...

yeah... then the NRL would turn to sh*t... :lol:

 

[African Monkey]

And where do we find him????

Playing grade cricket atm.

 

[Tonearm Terrorwrist]

shaun tait really knows how to f**k up

 

[shiznit]

what does Elliot average??? i thought i saw it come up on the graphic as 70 odd.... was thinking they must have mixed up his bowling average with his batting one... :lol:

 

[African Monkey]

what does Elliot average??? i thought i saw it come up on the graphic as 70 odd.... :lol:

It was 73.50 before he came out to bat today.

 

[beads6]

And where do we find him????

ummmmm it is just a thought. I think it is madness to not have a decent spinner in Australia I can't understand how the CA let it happen.

Take your pick..
Hauritz
Krejza
Doherty
Heal
Casson
Smith
Cullen
O'brien

 

[hineyrulz]

i posted this some time back, but its not bad

:lol::lol::lol:

 

[beads6]

shaun tait really knows how to f**k up

Would Hilfenhaus do any better?? Tait is a myth he lasts 2 overs absolute joke they pick him.

 

[hineyrulz]

ummmmm it is just a thought. I think it is madness to not have a decent spinner in Australia I can't understand how the CA let it happen.

Take your pick..
Hauritz
Krejza
Doherty
Heal
Casson
Smith
Cullen
O'brien

Fail....

 

[Tonearm Terrorwrist]

who mentioned hilfenhaus? wtf has hilfenhaus got to do with tait's garbage going down leg side

i posted this some time back, but its not bad

the all time best seller;

An Australian ventriloquist visiting New Zealand walks into a small town and sees a local sitting on his porch patting his dog. He figures he'll have a little fun.

Ventriloquist: "G'day Mate! Good looking dog, mate. Mind if I speak to him?"

New Zealander: "The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Aussie."

Ventriloquist: "Hey dog, how's it going old mate?"

Dog: "Doin' alright."

New Zealander: (extreme look of shock)

Ventriloquist: "Is this Kiwi your owner?", pointing at New Zealander

Dog: "Yep"

Ventriloquist: "How does he treat you?"

Dog: "Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food, and takes me to the lake once a week to play."

New Zealander: (look of disbelief)

Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your horse?"

New Zealander: "Uh, the horse doesn't talk either...I think."

Ventriloquist: "Hey horse, how's it going?"

Horse: "Cool."

New Zealander: (extreme look of shock)

Ventriloquist: "Is this your owner?" (pointing at New Zealander)

Horse: "Yep"

Ventriloquist: "How's he treat you?"

Horse: "Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me down often, and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements."

New Zealander: (total look of amazement)

Ventriloquist: "Mind if I talk to your sheep?"

New Zealander: "The sheep's a liar.

 

[hineyrulz]

Playing grade cricket atm.

Mo Matthews????