Favourite Movie Quotes

[Generalzod]

 

[horrie hastings]

You're Really Going To See That Marshall Bitch -Ava Gardner -Earthquake

Davey, That's Deeeeeep Water - Bette Davis -Burnt Offerings.

 

[Jim Rockford]

" I understand you have taken exception to my calling you whores. I'm sorry. I apologize. I ask you to note that I did not call you callous-ass strumpets, fornicatresses, or low-born gutter sluts. But I did say "whores." No escaping that. And for that slip of the tongue, I apologize." Paul Newman - The Life and Times of Judge Roy Bean.

 

[Wizardman]

Pain don't hurt - Patrick Swazye (Roadhouse)

 

[Mark B]

“Batman..can somebody tell me what kind of world we live in, where a man dressed up as a bat! Gets all my press. This town needs an enema.”

 

[mongoose]

one of my favs from The Crow just before Brandon Lee gets shot for real....

"well.... I see you have made your decision... now lets see you enforce it"

 

[Captain Apollo]

"One man is born a hero, his brother a coward. Babies starve, politicians grow fat. Holy men are martyred, and junkies grow legion. Why? Why why why why why why? Luck! Blind, stupid, simple, doo-dah, clueless luck!" - Two Face, Batman Forever (1995).

 

[Generalzod]

one of my favs from The Crow just before Brandon Lee gets shot for real....

"well.... I see you have made your decision... now lets see you enforce it"

One of my favourite films of tyhe 90s..

 

[Jim Rockford]

One of the great 80s comedies is D.C Cab. There are a tonne of great quotes in that movie. Here's some of the best-
Dell: Why are women so uptight? They've got half the money and all the pussy.

Tyrone: ...and don't think I feel sorry for you 'cause your daddy died. My father came back from the Korean War with his brains so scrambled, he thought he was Jesus! They put him in a nuthouse for five years, when he came out, he didn't think he was Jesus no more, he thought he was God. Which made me Jesus. This shit got pretty heavy.

Tyrone: [shouting in megaphone] You better come out now, you scumbags!
Harold: Cops don't talk like that.
Tyrone: They do to me.

Samson: Look! We found it! It says Bruce Leigh
[pronounced Lee]
Samson: .
Buddy: But that says Bruce Leg!
[thinking Leigh is pronounced Leg]
Samson: Didn't I tell you two to go back to school?

FBI Chief: Did Albert ever discuss his political convictions with you?
Dell: Albert don't have no political convictions. He's an American!

Dell: [to Tyrone and Albert] Listen, let me tell you something. You're lucky those porkchops didn't shoot you and say you're crazed on PCP, 'cause that's what they always say about everybody they shoot. And I think they're lacing the bullets with PCP, that way they got an alibi for killing everybody. Now think about it.

Tyrone: Where are you at?
Mr. Bravo: Don't you know you're not supposed to end a sentence with a preposition?
Tyrone: Ok. Where are you at, *asshole*?

Xavier: [to a worker in the hospital] Are these sheets changed every day? And I don't mean from room to room!

 

[Jim Rockford]

"The trained mind does not need a watch. Watches are a confidence trick invented by the Swiss." - Chiun(Joel Grey) - Remo Williams:The Adventure Begins

 

[Jim Rockford]

From the truly awesome Catch 22 (both the novel and the film)

Yossarian: I am the most renowned killer of fish in the whole United States Army Air Force.

Maj. Major Major Major: Is something wrong?
Tappman: No, no. I... just thought I saw something.
Maj. Major Major Major: A naked man in a tree?
Tappman: Yes, that's it.
Danby: [looking through binoculars] That's just Yossarian.

Danby: Yoassarian, you're fighting for your country.
Yossarian: I fought for my country for 3 years, now I'm fighting for myself.
Danby: Suppose everybody else thought the same way.
Yossarian: Then I'd be a damn fool to think otherwise.

Yossarian: He was very old.
Luciana: But he was a boy.
Yossarian: Well, he died. You don't get any older than that.

Danby: Weather conditions have improved tremendously over the mainland, so you won't have any trouble at all seeing the target. Of course, we mustn't forget, that means that they won't have any trouble at all seeing you.

General Dreedle: Get back in the car, you smirking s**t!

 

[Jim Rockford]

An alltime classic exchange from I'm Gonna Git You Sucka!

 

[hineyrulz]

An alltime classic exchange from I'm Gonna Git You Sucka!

Absolute classic movie.

 

[nöyd]

Snatch is loaded with classics.

Turkish: "What's up with those sausages Charlie?"

Charlie: "2 minutes Turkish!"

* 2 or so minutes later *

Turkish: "What's up with those sausages Charlie?"

Charlie: "5 minutes Turkish!"

Turkish: "You said 2 minutes 5 minutes ago!"

______________________________________

Turkish: "f**k me ol' Tom! What's that!?"

Tommy: "It's me belt Turkish"

Turkish: "No Tommy, there's a gun in your trousers. What's a gun doing in your trousers?"

Tommy: "It's for protection"

Turkish: "Protection from what? Ze Germans?"

 

[Parra]

Try not to suck any dick on your way back to the parking lot

 

[bileduct]

A few from a massively quotable movie - The Adventures of Ford Fairlane

"What are your names, Neil and Bob, or is that like what you do?"
"Conversation with Zuzu Petals was like masturbating with a cheese grater: slightly amusing, but mostly painful."
"What's the definition of a vagina? The box a penis comes in."
"It's alright. If you fall, I'll make it."
"[falling off roof of Capitol Records building] My hair. My hair."
"I coulda been a fisherman. Fishermen, they get up, they fish, they sell fish, they smelt fish. Reminds me of this girl I used to go with, Yvonne, she smelled like fish."
"I'm so terrific I have my own toll-free number: 1-800-UNBELIEVABLE."

"Johnny was the only guy who could out-disgust me. When we were kids we had gross-out contests. I coughed up a pile of phlegm on the table, he said "nice try" and pulled out a straw."

I *hated* Andrew Dice Clay's standup act, but The Adventures of Ford Fairlane is one of my favourite films.

 

[Jim Rockford]

The Outlaw Josey Wales

Josey Wales: Yeah, well, I always heard there were three kinds of suns in Kansas: sunshine, sunflowers, and sons-of-bitches.
Lone Watie: I didn't surrender, but they took my horse and made him surrender. They have him pulling a wagon up in Kansas, I bet.
Captain Terrill: Not a hard man to track. Leaves dead men wherever he goes.

 

[Mark B]

From the classic Stripes. The scene where Sgt Hulka is getting all the recruits to Introduce themselves.
Cruiser: “I joined the army because my father and brother were in the army. I thought I better join before I got drafted”
Sgt Hulka: Son, there ain’t no daft no more.”
Cruiser: “There was one?”

 

[Jim Rockford]

2010: The Year We Make Contact

Dave Bowman: "My God! It's full of stars!"

 

[Jim Rockford]

From arguably the greatest sports movie ever - Slap Shot (1977)

Jim Carr: Hi, Jim Carr again. Denis, I know that some in our audience don't know the finer points of hockey. Could you tell them, for example, what is icing?
Denis Lemieux: Well, um, icing happen when the puck come down, bang you know, before the other guys you know. Nobody there, you know. My arm go comme ça then the game stop then start up.
Jim Carr: I see. What is high-sticking?
Denis Lemieux: High-sticking happen when the guy take the stick, you know, and he go like that
[high-sticks Jim Carr]
Denis Lemieux: you know. You don't do that.
Jim Carr: You don't do that?
Denis Lemieux: Oh no, never, never.
Jim Carr: Why not?
Denis Lemieux: Against the rules. You know, you're stupid when you do that. Just some English pig with no brains, you know.
Jim Carr: Uh, what is slashing?
Denis Lemieux: Slashing is um, like that
[demonstrates on Jim Carr]
Denis Lemieux: you know.
Jim Carr: Mm-hmm. And there's a penalty for that?
Denis Lemieux: Yeah and for the trip also, you know like that
[demonstrates]
Denis Lemieux: . And for hook like this
[demonstrates]
Denis Lemieux: . And for spear, you know, like that.
[demonstrates]
Denis Lemieux: You do that, you go to the box, you know. Two minutes, by yourself, you know and you feel shame, you know. And then you get free.