Had to post this.
Hope everyone reading this is ok.
Trigger warning:
This post contains content about suicide.
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You are never alone.
“You may think people don’t [care], but one person always does." @MadKing1981 shares his story.
September is Suicide Prevention Month.
All Elite Wrestling is committed to the mental well-being of our talent, staff & our fans. We encourage anyone struggling to reach out & get help:
American Foundation for Suicide Prevention.
Source:
https://x.com/i/status/1572575120207462400
With the mental health thing it's in my family and you know my uncles and my dad there was no mental health thing back then and it was you're a man, shut up, hide it, protect the women and move on.
That's it. You're feelings didn't matter.
And you know they passed it on to their sons and so on and so forth and it sticks with you.
And I know when my dad finally realised that, not that something was off because there's nothing wrong with us if we have those kind of feelings. There's nothing wrong by the way. There's no such thing as normal. Let me put that out there. There's no such thing as normal. We make our own normal. My normal is not the same as the next man. Trust me. And vice versa.
But when my dad saw me going down that dark path, I'm his son and he said let's talk and he brought me to therapists and they just wanted to know not just why but more like how can we help? They accepted me for who I am and what I am. And helped me accept who I was and that's why I'm so open about talking about mental health because it was open in my house, because my dad lost a bunch of his friends from suicide. He didn't want to see his son go through that. I've lost a lot of friends to a suicide and I don't want anyone else dying no more.
You know what I mean? Because when you get in that dark place and get in that dark circle as I call it. Circling the drain. You just stop thinking that anyone cares about you. And you start thinking that you're worthless and that no one will care if you die tomorrow and that's not true. We put that in our own heads to justify our pain in our own minds. Our pain is already justified because we're human and we're feeling it. But we want everyone else to feel it and this and that.
There's no reason for that. You know? There's no reason not to talk anymore, there's no reason not to break the habits of the past. Every generation says they are progressing. My generation thought they were progressive and no this generation thinks they're progressive. Ok then let's be progressive about it. Why can't men talk about what they're going through? Why can't men talk about their feelings?
You can sit there and call me a clown or I'm soft or this and that, fine, but I'll be alive. I'll be with my friends and family. I'll be that soft but I'll be with them. And I'll still see my mother. You know? Everyone knows me I'm a mother's boy. But I'll still see my mother. I'll still see my dad. I can go wrestle and they'll be there.
Now imagine if that one time I was very close to suicide if I did it. None of this wouldn't happen. I wouldn't be here to talk to you today. And one of the hardest men I've met in my life, like a real straight OG with things I can't say because I'm not allowed to under the law, he talked to me about it and he saved my life. And he made me realise that people care.
You may think that people don't but one person always does. There is always one person. And when you hurt yourself it hurts that one person. Then it hurts that one person's friend. And that person's boyfriend or girlfriend and so on and so forth. And it becomes like a ripple effect. Like when you throw a rock or a pebble at a pond. You know? So people do care and you do affect people. And you're never really alone. You're not alone because I didn't think oh I'm special. Or because I go through this and I talk about that.
But when I see people come up to me at fanfests or they stop me and they tell me how they're going through their stuff, that makes me feel good. Because it reminds me that I'm not alone. It's an everyday struggle. For the past two weeks I've been going through it. Recently you know when I get in my own head and I beat myself up. And I'm sitting there in a house which I'm paying for which I should be happy about, but I'm sitting there beating myself up, because it's a never ending struggle and I don't know, I like the struggle now. Because you hear sayings and stuff without struggle there is no progress and never to suffer is to never be blessed, Edgar Allen Poe said, and I believe that. I believe when you suffer, you get past it you're a better person. And now that I'm in a position where I can talk to people about this I'm happy I progressed because now I can help and I just don't want to hear no more about people taking their lives because they didn't talk or I don't want to see a mother crying because her son is gone. Or a wife crying because her husband is gone. Or a son crying because their father is gone. I don't want to see it no more. I don't want to see that happen to anybody, I don't even have to know you, I just don't want to see it happen.
You know? Because we're only here for a cup of coffee man and when things hit you and you realise how short we are here for, you just want to live a happy life. And so does that mean medication? Fine go ahead knock yourself out there's nothing wrong with that. I'm on medication. I'm on Zoloft, I'm not ashamed of that. You make fun of me for that, you make fun of me, that's on you dog. God bless you. But I'm good.
You gotta do things that are right for you. And people say you can say this or say that and I get it all these buzzwords and whatever you have to say, but I truly inside feel this and I hope (as I'm sweating) everyone understands this: you are never alone. You're not. I'm telling you the God's honest truth here. There's always one person.
You may not have your family around anymore or maybe they've passed away this and that or maybe I remember there was a guy. There was an older guy who came to a bar that I used to bounce at and you know he was an older guy about 45 and didn't have his family, didn't have his wife and kids and he came to the bar every night and drank himself stupid. But he was a likable guy. And when I found out he committed suicide and the other bartenders found out, god that just ruined us. And we didn't even know the guy we just knew him from there. And that ruined us for like a week. All of us were just like we couldn't believe it. And we didn't even know him that well. Now imagine the people who knew him well.
There's always someone out there that you are going to affect. When you decide to take your own life and I just don't want people doing it no more.
Normal is another thing, get that word out of your head. There is no such thing as normal. That word is a lie. My normal is not yours. Do you think getting beatup for a living is normal? To me it is. Maybe not to you. Again that's my normal. We make our own. So I can blab on forever but that's the two things I want people to truly understand:
1. You're never alone, there's always one and that's all you need. All you need is one.
2. We make our own normal. We make it ourselves. No one else does.