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Least favourite TV Commentator

Worst commentator of all time


  • Total voters
    88
Messages
11,592
Warne knows cricket but he simply doesn't have the voice for commentary - can't stand listening to him.

Brayshaw is just an annoying git, shouldn't be doing tests.

Chappell is a cure for insomnia. He wafts on and on telling those tales of his and at the end there's little meaning or punchline behind it.
 

age.s

First Grade
Messages
7,746
Wait, no Healy? Did I imagine him pissing me off this summer?

Of the options presented I'd go with all of them. Can't listen to ABC because of the delay. Tubby's about the only one that doesn't seriously irk me. Mark "huge emotion pouring out of every member" Nicholas is my least favorite, Healy runner up with Warnie taking out the "emerging dickhead" award.
 

snoozer

Bench
Messages
4,491
Can't listen to ABC because of the delay.
mate i love the delay. where i am it's about 5 seconds! i have the tv on and the radio blaring, usually doing stuff around the house. if anything exciting happens i sprint to the telly!
 

Danish

Referee
Messages
32,002
I'd take a dry anal raping over having to spend any time discussing sport with James Brayshaw.

Ian Chappell is the only other one I really get annoyed with as he is too much a "back in my day men was men" old codger.

The rest of the aussies plus Nicholas have their bad qualities but generally aren't too bad. Taylor actually goes alright when discussing tactics, as does Warne.

As a general rule whichever opposition commentator/s channel 9 brings in for a test series are usually the best. Bumble and Vaughan were both good additions this summer I thought
 

Cheops

Juniors
Messages
254
Have to go with Chappell. Brayshaw and the like are annoying, but they're a lot easier to tune out than Chappell's grumpy old man routine over the same damn things. How many times do we need to hear the Bell should have batted at 3? And then when he did bat at 3 and failed twice, that was only because be wasn't batting there all series. If he'd just batted 3 at Adelaide, he would have made 1000 runs for the series, solved all England's problems, won the series and probably cured cancer in his spare time.
 
Messages
3,907
Have to go with Chappell. Brayshaw and the like are annoying, but they're a lot easier to tune out than Chappell's grumpy old man routine over the same damn things. How many times do we need to hear the Bell should have batted at 3? And then when he did bat at 3 and failed twice, that was only because be wasn't batting there all series. If he'd just batted 3 at Adelaide, he would have made 1000 runs for the series, solved all England's problems, won the series and probably cured cancer in his spare time.

Chappell is obsessed with Bell.
When England came out here in 2010 all he did was whinge about Bell batting at 6 and Trott at 3. He reckoned they should have switched, even after Trott had scored his second century of the tour and England had retained the urn he still wouldn't give it up.
 

ek999

First Grade
Messages
6,977
Have to go with Chappell. Brayshaw and the like are annoying, but they're a lot easier to tune out than Chappell's grumpy old man routine over the same damn things. How many times do we need to hear the Bell should have batted at 3? And then when he did bat at 3 and failed twice, that was only because be wasn't batting there all series. If he'd just batted 3 at Adelaide, he would have made 1000 runs for the series, solved all England's problems, won the series and probably cured cancer in his spare time.

I can't believe I didn't hear him say that if his brother was captain he would have told him he was batting at three and if he didn't like he would have said bad luck that's where you're batting.
 

Patorick

Moderator
Staff member
Messages
8,992
Chappelli is slowly tuning into a more headstrong Neil Harvey.

Shame, because his sound morals are getting lost in all his hate-filled vitriol.
 

Cockadoodledoo

First Grade
Messages
5,045
They really should look to bring Vaughan and Bumble out here fulltime. It was like a breath of fresh air whenever they entered the commentary box. Maybe the poms will take a swap of Brayshaw and Healy.

Ironic that whilst they suck at cricket that their commentators are the most interesting by far.
 

Red Bear

Referee
Messages
20,882
Ironic that whilst they suck at cricket that their commentators are the most interesting by far.
Vaughan and Bumble were good, but the others are fairly shit. Botham is a whinger and a git, Gower is boring as batshit and well and truely up his own arse and Hussain and Atherton are fairly boring. Strauss goes alright (although again a touch dull).

And as for that line from the article, I agree with it, but he could be discussing any home commentary team frankly. It's a common factor the world over.

I'll just stick to ABC Grandstand, especially now that Test Match Sofa, a great station, is seemingly getting a new cast, with the current batch apparently retiring :(
 

veggiepatch1959

First Grade
Messages
9,841
Having watched the Big Bash over the past few weeks, no one annoys me more than that smug Victorian merkin Damien Fleming.

His head is so far up his own arse, he should be looking like a ostrich who just visited a nightsoil field.
 

Notell

Juniors
Messages
635
ABC is so far and away above teleision coverage it is like comparing mountains with molehills. I only ever listen to the TV coverage when Bill Lawry is on. He is a great man, as anyone who saw him a couple of years ago present a baggy green to the latest player can surely attest.

From what I have heard from co-commentators when Bill is on, and the times leading to my banishment of ch 9 commentary, as well as watching in pubs and having no choice, my observations are:

Nicholas - professional presenter, likeable, knowledgeable, humble, a cut above the rest

Vaughn - Stifled by co-commentators and Nine's production. Excellent in assessments after day's play, articles and tweets. The former two flourished in the England tour by Australia. Would be excellent on radio.

Lloyd - A revelation to those who only watch our summer cricket. Has been a breath of fresh air for years now on our tours to England. His (deserved) popularity has seen him commercialised and battered. A prime example was in the ODI where he did an Elvis impersonation but was destroyed by Brayshaw on one side and Slater on the other. Steelers Wheel ought to use it as a film clip as a re-release of their hit.
NB Brayshaw went quite well in trying to stem the flood of stomach-churning, but was comprehensively outweighed by Slater. I thought Slater's performance singing Khe San at the AB Awards a few years ago was unbeatable, but I was proven wrong by his Buzz Lightyear that day.

Chappell - If you are at an RSL lucky enough to be talking to a veteran, you will respecfully and happily sit through the drone in order to pick up the gems. And be all the better for it. Listen to his whole dollar, and happily keep the 40 cents that makes it worthwhile.

Brayshaw - the less said the better. (Those should have been his instructions, by the way.)

Taylor - Too groomed to be effective on one hand, and too much a nerd when trying to be "one of the boys." If he were to just be himself, ie if you were having a few beers with him as a mate, would be peerless. Would be perfect on radio if told he was broadcasting only to the Surrey Hills pubs.

Slater - worst of all. His forced laugh is reminiscent of a pubescent teenager who knows he is out of his depth yet egotistically tries to get himself in with the big boys. Impossible that he knows how pathetic he is, otherwise he would no longer exist in public life. In my mind, the epitome and watershed moment in the catastrophic slide in the quality of channel 9 cricket commentary from B+ to Better off dead.

Healy - Terribly boring with his medical talk, his constant wicket-keeper lecturing a pertinent case in point (for all the Wade haters, I am sure that his coaching of Wade destroyed him psychologically - can you imagine being mentored by him?) Offers nothing in batsmenship expertise, bowling likewise. Ought to re-invent himself into being the person he is known and loved for. Straight-talking sledger. Forget all the technical stuff.

Warne - Would benefit from being a part of a 2 commentator system, the other beng a professional a-la Jim Maxwell, Richie Benaud. Totally wasted when with people he has no respect for. If complemented wisely, a potential gem.
 

undertaker

Coach
Messages
10,871
agree, Vaughan and Bumble are by far the best

One of the very few good decisions Ch9's sports department have made, bringing back overseas guest commentators. Vaughan (although he only did the Ashes) and Bumble were definitely a breath of fresh air and added a new dimension to the commentary.

Vaughan and Bumble were good, but the others are fairly shit. Botham is a whinger and a git, Gower is boring as batshit and well and truely up his own arse and Hussain and Atherton are fairly boring. Strauss goes alright (although again a touch dull).

And as for that line from the article, I agree with it, but he could be discussing any home commentary team frankly. It's a common factor the world over.

I'll just stick to ABC Grandstand, especially now that Test Match Sofa, a great station, is seemingly getting a new cast, with the current batch apparently retiring :(

Botham got a run on Ch9 during the 98/99 summer (how he and Chappelli didn't get into a massive punchup that summer I will never know, especially that staged appearance on A Current Affair), Gower was brought out here during the '92 World Cup and the following 92/93 summer, and Atherton was guest commentator during the 02/03 Ashes.

Gower is a pompous, upper-class snob, Hussain and Atherton's accent is annoying to listen to after a while and are both dull. Strauss is ok in commentary, although he was a tosser when captain (who could forget that blatant false catch he claimed in the '09 Lord's test?).

The person from Sky Sports I do miss is Bob Willis, who's now been confined to the on-camera roles alongside that prominent cricket journo from the UK (first name is Charles, can't remember the surname). Yeah, he's got an annoying voice but like Bumble he's a real character, sharp-shooter and one of the few non-PC commentators arround
 
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