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Random Wikipedia Rumble

Misanthrope

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Staff member
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47,624
Stole this idea from another site I read and thought it might make for an amusing diversion. Basically, I'll be doing a thirty man/woman/animal/object over the top WWE style royal rumble using participants decided by the Wikipedia random function.

This isn't just me writing and you reading. After each 'round', you'll be asked to vote on who you want to be eliminated. Votes are cumulative, so the more votes an individual picks up - the more likely they are to be eliminated as time goes by.

Who will triumph in the first ever FFB Random Wikipedia Royal Rumble?


Rules
1. 30 entrants, determined by...erm...the random page function on Wikipedia.
2. Vote for who you want to be ELIMINATED, not who you want to win.
3. Once a wrestler reaches 5 votes, they are eliminated.
4. After 5 votes have been cast, a new superstar will enter. (Sometimes after more than 5 votes, if I don't check the thread quickly enough.)
5. Once you have voted you may not vote again until somebody is eliminated, OR a new wrestler enters.
6. Every time somebody is eliminated, the vote total for each wrestler in the ring decreases by 1 (unless they are on 0. Then it remains 0).

1. Voina (eliminated by Buddy Lively)
2. Jose Mestre (eliminated by Joseph Ashe)
3. Buddy Lively (eliminated by Joseph Ashe)
4. Lydia Hearst-Shaw (eliminated herself)
5. Jessica Dunphy (eliminated by Joseph Ashe)
6. Sir Joseph Ashe
7. Louis Franceson (eliminated by Joseph Ashe and Ernest Augustus II)
8. Earnest Augustus II, Duke of Saxe-Weimar-Eisenach)

------

The lights go out at the Brooks Astronomical Observatory (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brooks_Astronomical_Observatory) as our commentary team of 43-1 boxing legend Riddick 'Sugar Man' Bowe (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Riddick_Bowe) and Tom Kraeutler, the co-host of the popular Money Pit Home Improvement Radio Show welcome us all to the show.

"Well sir," begins Kraeutler, "We're in for a real hammer and nails bout tonight. Yessir, it'll be all hands on deck with thirty participants using every tool in their toolshed in hopes of winning the first ever FFB Random Wikipedia Rumble. What say you, Sugar Man".

"Yep!"

And we're underway with our first participant en route to the ring. It's Russian performance art group Voina (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Voina). Are all of the groups dozen or so members getting into the ring? No! It looks like they're going to have some kind of performance art-off to decide.

After a nonsensical series of movements and some paint throwing, one of their number gets into the ring! How will this nondescript Russian person do tonight?

Some Portugese sounding music hits and on his way to the ring is Jose Mestre, the man made famous for having a 40cm, 5kg tumor on his face. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jos%C3%A9_Mestre).

The tumor is gone but the rage remains. Who will triumph in this battle between a Portugese post op tumor sufferer and a Russian performance artist?

Participants

Voina - 0
Jose Mestre - 0

Remember, you're voting for the person you'd like eliminated - not the one you'd like to win!
 
Last edited:

Didgi

Moderator
Messages
17,260
Tumourguy has a better sob story, he wins.

Vote: voina

I think I've been watching too much of the Voice
 

Misanthrope

Moderator
Staff member
Messages
47,624
Things are not starting well for our Russian performance artist who, despite the presence of 13 of his fellows at ringside, can't seem to get in any offense against a clearly fired up Portugese tumor-face.

Blow after knee trembling blow is landed by the irate Portugese man as the Voina member finds himself on the back foot from the get go. He's whipped hard to the corner and met with a flying head-butt. The titanium plates put into Jose's head during his facial reconstruction do some real damage. We've got blood on the mat already!

5...4...3...2...1

The crowd counts down as we await our next entrant and it's... former Cincinatti Reds occasional pitcher, Buddy Lively! (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buddy_Lively)

He's not coming to the ring empty handed though! He's got a baseball bat with him and he looks mad.

He slides into the ring and right away buries the baseball bat in Jose Mestre's stomach. The Portugese man doubles over and takes a hard blow to the back too.

Our Voina member turns around into a real home run style swing that sends blood, spit, and the Russian flying out and over the top rope!

ELIMINATION: The Voina Member (by Buddy Lively)

The former baseball...uh...'star' is on fire and Jose Mestre is down!

"Looks like he really hammered his advantage home there," quips Kraeutler, "What do you think, Sugar Man?"

"Yeah!"

Participants

Buddy Lively: 0
Jose Mestre: 0
 

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