Hi, I'm Bert Newton, and welcome to another instalment of cheap, lowest-common denominator TV. To begin: an announcement, we've finally received our first ever fan letter! legend_ss werites: "Dear Bert, 20 to 1 is my favourite show in the whole world, however Darius Boyd is the worst player in the whole world. He was even dropped from the Australian Squad! How crap is that!" Now I'm not sure who Darius is, legend_ss, but our writers have no better ideas, in fact no ideas, period, so why not devote a show to the person you've mentioned?yes i do.
we bring him down from Brisbane cause he was suppose to be a great player but he never really showed his worth at the Dragons like he did at the Broncos.
He was even dropped from the Australian Squad.
all these tries that he was to scored he was lucky to get 1 or 2 for the whole season, he went missing all season the only thing i can agree with was his defence other then that he brought nothing to the club.
so i think you better write that list now. :lol:
Number 20: Safest fullback in the comp. Cue anonymous channel 9 "celebrity": "Is it true he only fumbled one kick all season?" Cut to second even more anonymous "celeb": "Yeah I remember that dropped kick. It was against the Warriors. I picked up my dole cheque the same day"
Number 19: Positionally outstanding. Cut to Tracey Grimshaw: "Even for a rookie player he always appears to be in the right position, except when he was caught in the cubicle up in Brisbane. Shameful *shakes head*".
Number 18. Try savers. Some dude from the AFL Footy Show "As a AFL person, I don't know much about tackling." Cut to Underbelly cast extra number 31: "The trysaver against Melbourne where he nudged Tomane over the sideline, is slightly better, imo, than the ball-n-all hold up of Michael Luck over in Aucckland"
Number 17. Was his attack so poor? Hi 5 cast: "Some his try assists and line break assists were quite fab! High five! Yeah! Threw plenty of nice ones to B Moz to set up tries, and several to Coops to put him into space."
Cut to commercial. Sham-wow!
Welcome back to 20 to 1, the fan request edition. Our fan has been loving it!
Number 16. Tackle breaks. Peter Overton: "When I'm in bed with my mrs Jessica Rowe, I'm all about submission - but Darius never seems to submit in the tackle!" Dude from the fishing show: "Darius has broken more tackle than I have. I read that he had 134 tackle breaks for the year - among the best in the NRL"
Number 15. Return metres. Gay dude from the Today Show "Darius brings it up hard from the back" Anonymous "comedian": "Yep, more metres per game than any Saints player for the year. More than Morris, Weyman, Sailor, anyone."
Number 14. Line breaks. Fishing show dude: "Darius has broken more line than I have"'
.... ok I need to do some proper work today, that's enough ffs