Funniest Simpsons lines ever

[Raider_69]

Homer: Why you here?
Marge: We are going to get Arman back
Homer: Why am i here?
Marge: Because the city is no place for 3 unescorted ladies
Homer: Why are the kids here?
Marge: Cause we couldnt find grandpa to baby sit
Homer: Why is grandpa here?
Grandpa: Cause jasper didnt want to come alone
Homer: Ok
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Homer: Homer, homer simpson, he's the greatest/smartest guy in history, from the town of springfeild, he's about to hit a cheastnut tree.... D'OH!
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Ralph: When i grow up i want to be a principal or a catapiller, i love you principal skinner
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Ralph: Hi super nintendo chalmers
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Gill: You should of seen me honey i was.... no no but i was this close... hey who is that? is that bill?... OHh ya said it was over... no dont put him oHI BILL, how ya been?
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[JessEel]

Homer - I am so smart, I am so smart, S M R T, I mean, S M AR T

 

[Bazal]

Mr Burns-"Can't we thin this herd with some smallpox infected blankets?"

Mr Burns-"Non-violence never solved anything"

Barney beats Homer and becomes an astronaut, they celebrate with champagne.....
Barney-*Gulp*"It begins!" Drinks the bottle, steals a jetpack, crashes into the roof of a pillow factory and falls off etc
Scientist-"But I don't understand, that was non-alcoholic champagne. Oh well, I guess Homer wins."
Homer-"Woohoo!"(clebrates, can't remember exactly what he does/says, but I know he gets clubbed with a nightstick!)

Homer-"Operator! Get me the number for 911!"

Homer-"Kill my boss? Do I dare live out the American Dream?"

Homer-"Old people don't need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use."

Bart-"There's no such thing as a soul. It's just something they made up to scare kids, like the boogeyman or Michael Jackson."

Mr Burns-"I could crush him like an ant. But it would be too easy. No, revenge is a dish best served cold. I'll bide my time until ... Oh, what the hell. I'll just crush him like an ant."

Mr Burns-"Bad corpse! Stop ... scaring ... Smithers! "

Mr. Burns- "This anonymous clan of slack-jawed troglodytes has cost me the election, and yet if I were to have them killed, I would be the one to go to jail. That's democracy for you."
Smithers- "You are noble and poetic in defeat, sir."

 

[Dr Crane]

(clebrates, can't remember exactly what he does/says, but I know he gets clubbed with a nightstick!)

Default! Default!

 

[Bazal]

(clebrates, can't remember exactly what he does/says, but I know he gets clubbed with a nightstick!)

Default! Default!

Ahh yes that's it.....fuzzy memories, haven't seen that ep in a while

 

[Feez_Giggles]

Homer - I am so smart, I am so smart, S M R T, I mean, S M AR T

i say that all the time :lol:

 

[Anonymous]

Duffman-'Duffman can't breathe! Oh no Oh!

Duffman-'And now, to present you with your calendar, the Duff vice-president for calendars and fake id's...'

:lol: Duffman

 

[Feez_Giggles]

Duffman - funniest icon ever

 

[Bazal]

"Duffmans pension, has been mismanaged! Ooh yeah!"

 

[DJ Raida]

New thoughts are forming in Duffman- What would Jesus do?

 

[Mr Saab]

Duffman - funniest icon ever

up there with Disco Stu

 

[Feez_Giggles]

:shock: duffman owns disco stu

 

[Feez_Giggles]

can you imagine what it would be like if they had a fight. like an icon off or something. hahahahahahhaa

 

[Raider_69]

Duffman is thrusting in the direction of the problem. OHH YEA!!

 

[Mr Saab]

:shock: duffman owns disco stu

owns is a little strong.
Disco Stu has had some funny moments. Like when Homer was auctioning off some stuff and disco stu was dancing (george bush episode)

and when he tries and chats up marge, but then see she has children and Stu backs off.

 

[Dr Crane]

Sorry, Duffman rules Disco Stu, oohhh yeah.




Duff Exec: Homer, we have made an additive which makes beer extra malty, do you want to try it?
Homer: Wait, you aren't going to drug me, are you?
Duff Exec: No, of course not. Duffman!
*Duffman brings in the beer with malty additive, injects Homer in the arm*
*Duff Exec drings beer*
Duff Exec: Man, that is malty. Pity he'll never know about it, hahahaha.

 

[Raider_69]

:shock: duffman owns disco stu

and when he tries and chats up marge, but then see she has children and Stu backs off.

Stick it in, shoot it out, disco lady

*kids run to marge scream mum*

Back away, not today, disco lady

 

[Feez_Giggles]

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: that is a funny disco stu moment

duffman has a greater percentage of funny moments though

 

[Feez_Giggles]

Googlewar
"Duffman" 55,300 results
vs.
"Disco Stu" 25,800 results


The winner is:
Duffman

Google War doesn't lie

 

[Dr Crane]

Duffman, is top, ohh yeah.