Redneck Redfaces

[POPEYE]

If a bear sh*ts in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?

For the answers to these questions and more, stay tuned to REDNECK REDFACES! And now here is your host...POPEYE THE SAILOR MAN...

(cue intro music:

Wipe Your A**
Watch Yourself
Wipe Your A**
Show me what you're working with)

Never far away from your luckless leader are you. Inspiring as it may seem to you I don't think he needs
a loose canon on the deck when he's struggling to keep his feet. Better if you impress him by just carrying
his battered body back to some thread an old lady that has no idea is trying to post in

 

[POPEYE]

To all and sundry, the night's entertainment is over as there are more pressing matters.
The rednecks may want to carry on without me and I'm sure their entourage will back
them up but hardly worth staying up late for. I will be back in the morrow to tidy up

 

[Silent Knight]

Night POPEYE. You don't want to miss MATLOCK! I'll cya tomorrow for another episode of REDNECK REDFACES and we'll sort out the turnips from the yabbies.

Too eassssssillllllllyyyyyyy!

 

[sensesmaybenumbed]

You're relying on naivity as the only game plan . . . could come back to bite where your balls once were.
How long before people realise you progressed from cholesterol to a clot. You think those on this forum
are dumb enough to lose interest in reading my posts when they have to climb over 200mm of bling.
Not to mention the contents of the links you have obviously garnished over many hours for this occasion.

I'm actually flattered that you think I require such an effort. I know that you want to be the Julia Gillard
of the rednecks but like her you will soon run out of options . . . believable ones anyway

Sorry for stealing your Bellamy inspired gameplan.

I'm actually unsurprised that you think I require such an effort. I know that you want to be the Craig Bellamy of the yabbies but like her you will soon run out of filing cabinets . . . Second ones anyway

 

[AlwaysGreen]

Good night sweet prince. May all your dreams be of Bellamy.

 

[POPEYE]

Seems the Sharks have finally set off on the only path that a club who is battling against the odds can take.
Wanted to make up the numbers, operating from a place of perceived insignificance, lambasted by many
including myself for not taking a way out when it was presented and generally seen as just a nuisance on the field.

They've found a coach and told him the club is not interested in immediate results, more so a steady improvement
with as few backward steps as possible. They have a player renowned as being the best in the world in his position
who refuses to leave the joint. Outcasts are welcome as long as they turn up when they're told and do what's asked of them on the field.

Another breath of fresh air for me to suck in . . . great not to be confined to the land of the one-eyed demon

 

[AlwaysGreen]

They call him flipper, flipper,
Faster than lightening
No one you see is faster than he.

There's no better feeling in life than following a great coach. When I was a young turnip I was the king of the tee ball diamond and I can thank Mrs Marsh for that. She was the Bellamy of my generation but with a body that had you thinking with your one eyed demon. Valvoline, you know what I mean.

 

[POPEYE]

Amongst those out there who are waiting for my comeuppance there must be some who pity me for
the incessant attack I'm apparently enduring. Don't bother yourselves. The rednecks will never understand
but I need them . . . as long as they remain homogeneous.

 

[AlwaysGreen]

Amongst those out there who are waiting for my comeuppance there must be some who pity me for
the incessant attack I'm apparently enduring. Don't bother yourselves. The rednecks will never understand
but I need them . . . as long as they remain homogeneous.

Ooooooh, kinky.

 

[POPEYE]

To all you heading out to two-up good luck. If all else fails look for a woman who only wins now and again
and bet against her. Women are stubborn and won't walk away if they're doing their arse.

You could also try just watching the centre and if two heads are thrown in a row bet big against the third.
Never change the size of your bet and at the end of the day you'll finish in front. The odds of more than 50%
of the tossers throwing three heads in a row to claim the centre are very poor.

Unles of course the tossers are AG, smbn or SN . . . I'd bet against them every throw

 

[POPEYE]

Any of you whining about pay tv should join the rest of us watching the best game of the week, Monday night footy,
and the rest of the games without ads. A Fox replay of a nine game not only cuts out the ads and shows what happens
the entire game but does away with some of the Gus/Rabs garbage.

If you're a smoker and can't give it away cut down a pack a week and replace it with Foxtel or Austar.
If you're a pisspot cut back on the grog, improve your health and watch footy on a real League oriented channel.
If you're tubby and are trying to convince yourself not to shove junk down your throat think of the footy you could afford.
If you're a rev head spend a little less on juice during the footy season.
If you're partner is giving you the shits find one that really loves you and likes the footy.

To everyone else I sympathise

 

[AlwaysGreen]

The above posts by old mate were excerpts from his soon to be released book: Popeye the Failure Man's guide to better living. This. Beautifully handcrafted 11 page pop up book tells the world how our resident turnip connoisseur, Bellamy lover and all round crackpot views his little life. Dedicated to the almighty Redneck in the Sky this book is a must have for all those who are considering a lobotomy and want to know what life is like after the operation. Available at all good book outlets for 5 yabbies.

 

[POPEYE]

I've just about come to the end of my tether with you . . . you're f**king hopeless. I give you plenty of new material and you're still stuck in the proverbial mud. Doesn't your brain have a gearbox.

 

[sensesmaybenumbed]

Unles of course the tossers are AG, smbn or SN

Figured out the shift and caps keys, POPEYE has!

I've just about come to the end of my tether with you . . .

At the end of his tether, he is!

 

[POPEYE]

Figured out the shift and caps keys, POPEYE has!

At the end of his tether, he is!

You're way behind the times. Your effeminate leader charged me with a CAPITAL offence after just a few posts
in this forum over a year ago. If I remember correctly he abused me after my very first post because I used paragraphs.
So, I began a crusade against you rednecks and it continues still.

By the way, what does 'sensesmaybenumbed' mean. Were you drug f**ked and now in rehab, killed too many
brains cells on Jack or just can't get it up. I tried to change from caps to lower case at the beginning when I saw
the typo but administration denied me for some reason, maybe along with 1970 they did some fishing of their own . . . could be my reputation preceded me

 

[POPEYE]

So there you have it. Wonder if Buderus was happy with the scorelines from ANZAC Day. For the first time in a while
I felt sorry for the Roosters, and not just because Smith is their coach. Considering 'benefit of the doubt' changes from
game to game the Roosters were the better side. If it had to be given to the winners Weyman was man of the match imo.
Why Mini was the only one trying to diffuse a short kickoff, and a pisspoor attempt at that, bemuses me.

Record books . . . doncha love 'em. Storm thrashes Warriors. Both teams clearly suffering from the Test but they went
through the motions anyway and the game deserved no more or less than a draw. It was player loss versus player
tiredness and discipline won, only on the scoreboard.

The best thing to come from the game was next year's new half for the Warriors, Pita Godinet. If he's not wrapped up they better get their fingers out.

As a postscript . . . hands up all those who think that slow motion should be banned from replays

 

[AlwaysGreen]

POOR POPEYE, STILL STUNG BY THE RESPONSE TO HIS FIRST RATSHIT RAMBLE :lol: YOUR REPUTATION DID PRECEDE YOU OLE MATE - YOU WERE SPOTTED FOR A CLICHE RIDDEN TROLL FROM A HUNDRED YARDS.
IF YOU CAME OUT OF THE CLOSET AND ANNOUNCED YOU WERE A STORM FAN AND SALARY CAP RORT APOLOGIST STRAIGHT AWAY RATHER THAN THIS 'I SUPPORT GOOD COACHES' YABBIE SHIT YOU MIGHT NOT BE SEEN AS THE LIVING JOKE THAT YOU ARE.

TOOOOOOOOOO EASSSSSY.

SIGnEd ThE GlOrIOuS LeAdEr.

 

[POPEYE]

See how easy it is folks. Their bark is the only thing they've got . . . they bite like a puffer.
You might ask why I keep their springs wound up. I can't keep this thread on the board without
their help but my telling you this won't stop them . . . conceitedness will always get their better.

I even got the grandeur delusional turkey to admit he thinks he's their leader . . . wonder what
the cattle will say

 

[sensesmaybenumbed]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e0mx5ERj1eI

 

[POPEYE]

Here's another one. These links are not for my benefit because I don't look at them. Anyone who talks with pictures is no good to me.

You can bet he's been sitting up all night and has got an arsenal.