Storm Chaser, alcohol is a disinhibitor, amongst other things, even in mild doses. A big night can definitely cause anterograde amnesia from a certain point in the evening.
Euphoria (BAC = 0.03 to 0.12%)
- Overall improvement in mood and possible euphoria
- Increased self-confidence
- Increased sociability
- Shortened attention span
- Flushed appearance
- Impaired judgment
- Impaired fine muscle coordination
It gets worse after that
While it's a legitimate mitigating factor to a party snog, it's his reaction that'll be the important thing. Is there genuine remorse and regret and a desire to make amends? If not why not? He might be deeply ashamed and not very good at dealing with it or he might just think it was no big deal and you're being silly to even raise it. Ultimately it depends on how you feel about him, your relationship, yourself, the way he handled the situation and what you think is likely to happen in the future. It could be the start of the corrosion that eventually ends things or an inflection point that leads to a more mature and loving relationship going forward. Only time will tell.
To Mr Radich - Jokers Wild makes good points, but ask yourself - is doing the same stuff for the rest of your life really going to make you as happy as you think it will? Are you taking a balanced view of what it means to be a parent? You seem to be only looking at the negatives. I have 3 kids, 13, 10 and 7 - g,b,b). As an example - I used to get up early, hit the beach with mates and surf all morning, come home, have a beer, chill out with the TV or a movie, maybe dose off, hang out with some people I like. A good day. Sunday I went to Kings beach with my family - spent a while shoving the 7 year old onto waves on a boogie board and teaching him a bit about sets, banks, rips etc, helped my 10 year old out the back on his board and was stoked to see him getting better, looked in rockpools with my 13 year old got her to appreciate that surfing can be something a girl can do too (she's now very keen on the boogie board). Hung with the wife on the beach and went for a swim etc. Went home, had a beer, watched a movie and hung with my family and a few drop-ins.
In other words - like the old days a lot, but way better. I didn't catch a lot of waves, but thats OK, I've caught a lot and frankly I had more fun helping my kids start catching theirs.
I had my first kid when I was 28. I thought it was a bit early, but there are lots of very good reasons for women to not have kids too late, it was important to my wife and so thats what happened. It turns out to have been a great decision. We made it work and work well. I was the first of my friends to do it, we have no family support structure to speak of (death, geography etc). Its not easy when they're really little, but it's not as bad as most people make out either. The people I know who had the hardest time adjusting tended to be intrinsically selfish and lazy to begin with. Some really turned around and grew into much better people, others got resentful.
I love my kids and wouldn't go back to the old single, childless life for anything. I love them more than it's possible to explain. Life changes, but change is good. As human beings, we need to evolve. At least I think so. My biggest decision was the third one. I was really done at 2 - one boy, one girl. My wife really felt like she wasn't done. We talked about it a lot and in the end I just figured that if I loved the first 2 so much, how could one more be a bad thing? I was worried about a lot of things with an extra one, including the cost, but let me tell you, I would NEVER go back and I don't regret it for a second. The 3 of them are like their own little pack too. They squabble sometimes, but watching them grow up together is one of the purest joys in my life.
Lastly - Make sure that your thinking is right, or your reactions will be wrong. Have a look at this link and think about how you're reacting and thinking right now.
http://psychcentral.com/lib/2009/15-common-cognitive-distortions/
