That's so awful
I've seriously thought about suicide, myself, multiple times.
The only thing that has stopped me from doing it is thinking that it would end my pain, but my wife, and son, would feel pain that would not heal.
But I understand how things can deteriorate to a point that you just can't take it any more.
And I also understand all too well why people often don't see it coming - people can hide it very well.
Mental health is just such an important part of your overall well-being.
I've struggled with depression for 22 years, and it is tough.