You wont stop our group sex romps: NRL player

[$$Poor Boy Blues$$]

you know, we are all dancing around the real issue here, and the media are playing up to the fact that NO ONE REALLY wants to touch on the real issue

The girl. (because when you get to her, the whole case falls apart...poor Matt!)

She was consensual to it all.

She really is just emmotionally fragile. Some girls are wackjobs, some are great. You cant come in and say yes please boyz, fk me wild, then try and destroy everyone afterwards.

Why isnt she taking some responsibility for her actions and going "I agreed to it, i must admit now i think about it, its not my cup of tea, i do regret it, but its time to move on to something more positive in my life"

(im married now with 2 kidss but) I've dated many women. I've lost count. More than 50-80. Keep going. I would like to think Im just average as most guys I know personally have done about that. Now let me tell you out of that number, 80% of the women to my mind, just dont fit with me. Lots are just plain crazy.

Its got nothing to do with standards, or picking the wrong girl...its seriously just a probability/numbers game.

And this is why I feel sorry for Matt. How the hell was he to know that this chick was a wack job. Between you and me and the public, girls who go for group sex - usually are little bit 'out there'.

It takes a special kind of 'compromised' girl to love group sex. Compromised temporarily in that she wants to try something rebellious/new/whatever...or compromised indefinately in that she perhaps had a messy upbringing/bad ideas about love and enjoyment.

The healthiest kind of sex is the one on one kind. There is a difference between the guys using it for fun and HER using it for therapy!

So yes, I do feel sorry for Matt.....as the girl needs to own up to herself and get over it. IF it was consensual, and the boyz, the cops and her all said it was at some stage.

Thats what I dont get. Johns is really the fall guy, and this chick from nz looking for payback is a total b!tch.

We all make bad choices everynow and then, but this guy is paying for it over the top....he did nothing wrong apart from being unfaithful.

____

In society there is nothing more taboo than sex. Gallops comments are totally out of place here. It was group sex, so what, it was consensual, she's a wack job, and the media are lapping it up....because the majority of people still have a stigma about sex.

Those who get lots of sex - believe me - dont have a stigma....but with most guys getting only 4 or 5 sexual partners in a lifetime, its no wonder stigma exists.

 

[Shorty]

Whoever this player is, has done nothing to help the image of the club....I mean it's probably made it even worse.

 

[$$Poor Boy Blues$$]

Whoever this player is, has done nothing to help the image of the club....I mean it's probably made it even worse.

I tend to think its a made up person myself. Papers love to do this when they just HAVE to get their opinion out there and add some juice to the story.

 

[God-King Dean]

This actually pissing me off for once.

Question: Why do people give 2 sh*ts about what footy players (& celebrities for that matter) do ?

 

[Will De Ness]

The issue is we all have different morals

Some find group sex immoral and disgusting, others love it.

Some in this world would never back against their own team whereas others ...

 

[herbert henry1908]

This actually pissing me off for once.

Question: Why do people give 2 sh*ts about what footy players (& celebrities for that matter) do ?

I think its a combination of things.

The good old tall poppie syndrome plays a part.

I also think many out there like to blame poor behaviour of their children on celebrity influence rather than look at their own home for reasons.

Its also great for some people to feel morally superior to others.

Either way if the tables were turned and we started looking into every joe blogs private life im sure many peoples opinions would change.

much of celebrities/sports stars lives are for public consumption however , but there needs to be a line drawn.

 

[God-King Dean]

Another question.

Why are footy players role models ? People only decided they are when the media started saying that are. Why do the media want to them to be seen as role model ? So when there's a scandal they can cause moral outrage to sell more papers.

Anyone that thinks players being portrayed as role models isn't about $$$ is very naive.

 

[Firey_Dragon]

F*** me...I've heard some dumb conspiracy theories on the forum over the last few days but this well and truly takes the cake.

Maybe she is only able to deal with this situation after seven years. We are not her. We have not been through what she has been through. We can not judge her situation. We can only base things on her version of the event against Johns version of the event.

The ABC wouldn't have paid for the story and I certainly don't think they would have allowed a thrid party to pay for the story. How f***ing stupid...

You are aware that current affairs programs quite often pay for interviews, including four corners?

I'm not suggesting that she was or wasn't, but it is a poor assumption to state outright that she wasn't paid.

 

[myanonymoususername]

you know, we are all dancing around the real issue here, and the media are playing up to the fact that NO ONE REALLY wants to touch on the real issue

The girl. (because when you get to her, the whole case falls apart...poor Matt!)

She was consensual to it all.

We don't know that. Johns says she was. She says she wasn't - at least to some of it. Who do you believe?

She really is just emmotionally fragile. Some girls are wackjobs, some are great. You cant come in and say yes please boyz, fk me wild, then try and destroy everyone afterwards.

Correct, but again who knows in this case if thats what happened.

Why isnt she taking some responsibility for her actions and going "I agreed to it, i must admit now i think about it, its not my cup of tea, i do regret it, but its time to move on to something more positive in my life"

Reasonable point assuming it was consensual all the way, which we don't know.

And this is why I feel sorry for Matt. How the hell was he to know that this chick was a wack job. Between you and me and the public, girls who go for group sex - usually are little bit 'out there'.

Characterising her as a wack job relies on believing what Johns says is actually what happened. Her old boss described her along the lines of "the last person you would expect to be involved", one of the police described her as "a very young 19".

Now I know those people are in no position to know everything about her. She may well have gone from librarian material in the day to gangbang groupie after hours, but you are making assessments of her character and mental state based on what? Johns' version of events.

So yes, I do feel sorry for Matt.....as the girl needs to own up to herself and get over it. IF it was consensual, and the boyz, the cops and her all said it was at some stage.

Again, this is all assumption based on your choices to afford Johns more credibility than her. She may well incentive to lie about it, but so do the "boyz" if their joining in, watching and wacking off was non-consensual. In fact I think they have more to gain by lying than she does - she's not the one going to jail if what she says is true and they are lying.

Thats what I dont get. Johns is really the fall guy, and this chick from nz looking for payback is a total b!tch.

Again, you must choose to believe Johns to assume she is looking for payment and is thus a bitch. I agree she is after some payback - she said her motives for speaking to 4 Corners included to let the players wives and girlfriends know what they did to her. I don't think that is unreasonable of her if her version of events is what did happen.

As for him being the fall guy, he has control over that, as do the other guys that were in on the gangbang.

We all make bad choices everynow and then, but this guy is paying for it over the top....he did nothing wrong apart from being unfaithful.

According to him. She says there was more wrong - although even by her account it doesn't look like Johns did anything non-consensual - except perhaps setting her up for the rest to happen and not stopping even if he thought something was wrong.

____

In society there is nothing more taboo than sex. Gallops comments are totally out of place here. It was group sex, so what, it was consensual, she's a wack job, and the media are lapping it up....because the majority of people still have a stigma about sex.

No problem with group sex if it was what everyone wanted. However you have to believe Johns' story to be able to say it was consensual and that she's just a wack job who had post gangbang regrets. His version is no more credible than hers.

 

[Lambretta]

thanks , but im not.



If the women ( or men) involved is consenting she is not being treated as a piece of meat. Really its that simple.

and if there is a view that a group romp is somehow degrading to all women thats just ludicrous.

If an individual woman wants to get involved in group sex with multiple males that is her choice.

Have you ever discussed these issues with a woman?

Go on. Have a good long, open and frank discussion with a woman about this.

Tell her about your opinions on consent.

You might be rudely awakened.

Consenting sex with one man, or two men...... can be slightly different to what the woman feels like if four or five other men burst into the room and start demanding to join in.

Where does consent go if no one stops to ask the woman if she is ok with it and they assume that silence = consent?

Is that consent?

 

[typicalfan]

I think the message in the initial post is about player freedoms in their private lives moreso than just group sex.

Unless something illegal transpires then I don't want to know about it.

 

[muznik]

Have you ever discussed these issues with a woman?

Go on. Have a good long, open and frank discussion with a woman about this.

Tell her about your opinions on consent.

You might be rudely awakened.

Consenting sex with one man, or two men...... can be slightly different to what the woman feels like if four or five other men burst into the room and start demanding to join in.

Where does consent go if no one stops to ask the woman if she is ok with it and they assume that silence = consent?

Is that consent?

I guess the players believed she gave consent when she turned to them as a group and said something along the lines of "Well c'mon someone f**k me!" "No not you you're ugly, anyone but you"

Thats if we believe Matt John's story.

Which after watching both programs i am inclined to.

 

[Lego_Man]

Silence does equal consent IMO, unless you have rendered her unable to protest in some way.

 

[Alex28]

You are aware that current affairs programs quite often pay for interviews, including four corners?

Four Corners aren't in the habit of paying for stories dude...yet to hear back from my mate but as soon as I do I'll post...

 

[Big Time]

This actually pissing me off for once.

Question: Why do people give 2 sh*ts about what footy players (& celebrities for that matter) do ?

Because people spend good money watching these players, buying merchandise etc. We pay these players, so when the f*ck up we don't like it.

 

[Big Time]

Regardless of everything, this is not a good look. The blokes all know where they stand now. They need to be mature adults and decide whether they are willing to continue running the gauntlet. They know that they can engage in group sex, consensual or otherwise, but if it comes out they need to accept that this could end their career. They are big blokes, and all can make the choice. The general public don't accept this as a norm, no player is going to change the publics view, so its up to the player to decide what they do. I know women throw themselves at these blokes, these blokes need to realise though that occasionally these women are going to talk. If you get caught out tough luck, you knew the consequences before you did it so you are just going to have to cop it on the chin. These blokes are role models and treated as super heroes, they might not like it, but most people also don't like working 50-60 hours a week.

I think the public have a right to demand the game cleans up its act, especially in regards to how players treat women. These blokes unfortunately are out of touch with reality. They cry poor and expect the world but are quite prepared to accept the money that is handed out for playing a sport. In reality it is the public who pay these players. They buy the merchandise, they go to the games and buy the hot dogs and beers, they go back to the leagues clubs and pump money through the pokies, etc etc. If the public says enough is enough, ignorant gents like the bloke in the interview, need to maybe give up on the sob story and open their ears.

I am a league supporter, love the game and have played the game for a number of years. I just do not understand this culture, or the reasons behind why some blokes feel they have the right to do some of the things they do. It would be ludicrous though to suggest this is simply a league problem. Thing is though, we need to clean up our own backyard, then when we do the other codes will start to stick out like dogs balls when they take a wrong step.

It all comes down to education and I believe the NRL are doing the best they can in this area. Unfortunately you still have a few old heads around feeding the young blokes coming through the stories of their adventures and making hereos of themselves. Maybe the clubs need to identify these players and start weeding them out. Clubs like Bulldogs have obviously gone in that direction. They have rid themselves of some very talented players but in return have signed the likes of Kimmorley and retained an ageing El Masri, both who are obviously people they see as strong role models for their younger players.

 

[God-King Dean]

Because people spend good money watching these players, buying merchandise etc. We pay these players, so when the f*ck up we don't like it.

I go to watch footy, for footy. Not for the Days of our Lives.

 

[Phillips]

Because people spend good money watching these players, buying merchandise etc. We pay these players, so when the f*ck up we don't like it.

maybe people should worry about there own lives?

 

[God-King Dean]

Exactly.

Those who worry about other peoples business, have no business of their own. Gossip is for women & losers.

 

[Pete Cash]

Well as I said in the other thread women (and losers I guess) are an important demographic.

Mothers have a huge say in what sports their children play and follow.